The People's Cube - Political Satire

The media controversy sparked by Barack Obama's statement 'If I had a son, he'd look like Trayvon' has prompted many prominent citizens to come to his defense by declaring, in the I-am-Spartacus fashion, "If I also had a son...":

Nancy Pelosi: "... he'd owe China $256,000,000 before he reaches puberty."

George Soros: "... he'd own a chauffeured tricycle."

Bill Clinton: "... he'd know what 'is' is."

Hillary Clinton: "I already have a son and his name is Bill."

Michael Bloomberg: "... he wouldn't be eating trans fats - or he'd be out of the will."

Harry Reid: "... he wouldn't smell like the unwashed masses visiting the Capitol."

Sheriff Joe Arpaio: "... his birth certificate wouldn't have PDF layers."

Donald Trump: "What Sheriff Joe said."

Al Sharpton: "... he wouldn't be a honky or one of them Jews."

Michael Moore: "... I wouldn't eat him as long as he doesn't get between me and the fridge."

Joe Biden: "I have a son? Have we met?"

Rosie O'Donnell: "... I'd keep him in a cage and train him to attack toupees, and then I'd invite Donald Trump over and open the cage."

Oprah: "... I'd keep him away from Rosie O'Donnell."

Anita Dunn: "... I'd name him Mao Tse-Dunn."

Eric Holder: "... I'd tell him he was conceived during fast and furious sex, then I'd smuggle him into Mexico."

Occupy Theoretician Elizabeth Warren: "... I'd wait for him to crap all over himself, then throw him at the police."

Debbie Wasserman Schultz: "... I'd hire Bill Maher to teach him manners and Anthony Weiner to teach him photography."

Safe Schools Czar Kevin Jennings: "I'd teach him to have safe sex - with me."

HHS Director Katherine Sebelius: "I'd give him an exemption from ObamaCare."

Mitt Romney: "I'd give him an exemption from RomneyCare."

John Edwards: "... I'd bequeath to him my secret to silky, sensuous, and coquettish man-hair."

Al Gore: "... I'd cut his feet off so I wouldn't have to worry about his carbon footprint."

Science Czar John Holdren: "I can't have a son; I cut my testicles off so I can sleep at night not worrying about overpopulation."

An anonymous Georgetown Law Student: "Having blown my entire trust fund on contraceptives, I damn well better not get pregnant with a son!"

Supreme Court Justice Ruth Ginsberg: "... I'd send him off to South Africa, they have a better constitution."

CNN host Soledad O'Brien: "... I'd read him fairy tales, starting with Critical Race Theory."

MSNBC host Chris Mathews: "... I'd tell him bedtime stories of the adventures of the heroic knight, Sir Barry Obama, unless instructed otherwise."

Robert F. Kennedy XXXLXVII: "... I'd name him 'Robert F. Kennedy XXXLXVIII.'"

Charlie Sheen: "... I'd pay him to go away."

____________________
Additional reporting by Robert Fine

I saw Dear Leader's son on FNSunday. I could imagine hearing Bill Ayers in the background hollering "You tell 'em!' as David Plouffe artfully dodged and lied his way through every question Chris Wallace threw at him.
It's not Team Mao
It's Team PAO, Plouffe Ayers Obama.

Too bad they levied such a heavy white-boy tax on tanning beds, 'cause plouffe could use a few rays...... but need some suggestions on how to fix that Rep Weiner look-a-like pencil neck ...........

The shovel-ready jobs seem to go to only those at the top.
Is this what paradise is supposed to look like Karl Marx?

He may not have a son, but he has an uncle by adoption.


Joe Stalin was Uncle Joe to FDR.
Robert Mugabe is Uncle Bob to Jimmah Carter.
I am sure Jimmah will not mind sharing Uncle Bob with Dear Leader.

If he had a son would he have a birth certificate? Now we know why he is pushing the Dream act so hard. He's an illegal immigrant and needs to become a citizen!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jrQp6qS ... e=youtu.be

George Bush: "It would be my fault!"

Komrad Phobianov wrote: Is this what paradise is supposed to look like Karl Marx?

When Dear Leader finally gets a Y chromosome thru all that estrogen / birth control - paradise will indeed be reborn!

Tim Tebow: My wife would trade him for Peyton Manning's kid

Ben Bernanke: I can't have children due to quantitative easing

Energy Sec'y John Chu: He wouldn't own a toy car

Treasury Sec'y Geithner: We could learn to use Turbo Tax together!

Warren Buffett: I don't need any more tax deductions, I already pay far too little

Senator John Kerry: I was against having children before I was for it

Alan Grayson: I'd teach him to stay off of cross-town busses when daddy's driving

Kim Jong-un: He'd have any woman he wants and one day be unanimously chosen leader of North Korean utopia by the will of the People! What the hell did you expect?

Alec Baldwin: I'd have someone to hand my cellphone to when the plane takes off

Sen. Chuck Schumer: He'd take pictures of ME!

Thomas Friedman: I'd have to adopt a Chinese kid because western ones don't work quite as well

Jerry Brown: We'd have the best set of trains in the world!

Sherrif Clarence Dupnik: Damn that Palin for making me pregnant!

Fidel Castro: He'd take over for Raul when he finally dies, and live to be 120.
Ted Kennedy: I'd tell him to watch out for bridges...*hic!*
Bashar al-Assad: I inherited power from my father was elected fairly when my father died, and my son will inherit power from me be elected fairly like I was.
Ahmad Yasin (Hamas founder): He'd blow up so fast.
Vladimir Putin: He'd be Czar Vladimir II.

Eliot Spitzer – he'd be client 9.5

Medvedev – I'd tell Vladimir about him

Jeremiah Wright – “Dem Jews” would be keeping me away from him

Aw come on now, Obama, why don't you just get down to the nitty gritty and say what you mean? Let's consider a new National Anthem! Get real, Mr. President!
If I had a son, blah blah, blah… Hows about: If I had a Hammer? Huh! Get with it, man!

Comrade Putout!

Excellent post, but you are dangerously drifting toward reality! Be careful, my friend!

if I had a shovel I'd make job to feed son but jobs all done. Hey comrade can you spare a stale bun??

slaveworker#121667 wrote: Hey comrade can you spare a stale bun??

Comrade, the collective is all about sharing and hears your cry, you can have this one.

spa-see-ba comrade, but suddenly I am no longer hungry. The campaign rhetoric of Great Leader will sustain me until summer harvest but I thank you.

Comrade Putout,
Can you supply us with an enlargement of what Dear Leader is holding (these bad boys)? I just can't see it, sorry! X!

Evidently Dear Leader simply cannot have a son. With his coupling with Michelle, his genes just don't go "that way."

Just sayin'

Comrade Putout wrote:Pamalinsky - I enlarged the 'device'... do they have permission to use your likeness?

Comrade Putout!

As a wiser comrade (Biden) once said, "This is a BFD!"

Permission? Who cares! The publicity this will engender for me is stupendous and the exposure, alone, could snag me Kathleen Sebelius's job as Secretary of HHS! In fact, Putout, this could go viral! Brilliant idea! I, in turn, and to show my gratitude, will duly appoint you as my Publicity Agent. Think of all the power and money we'll have!

And, to top it all off, I can sleep well at night knowing I have done my part to stem the flow of STDs, for The Children™ of course.

Sandra Fluke, eat your heart out!

Pamalinsky wrote:
And, to top it all off, I can sleep well at night knowing I have done my part to stem the flow of STDs, for The Children™ of course.

You have also stemmed the flow of children!

These Obama condoms are real. I saw them myself on sale in a Washington souvenir store.

Condom users of the world, unite!
THIS FIGHT IS FOR THE CHILDREN! ™
We are all here only because our parents didn't have access to free government condoms!

Capt. Commie wrote: You have also stemmed the flow of children!

Shhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!

If i have son in these times. I call him Unlucki. Unlucki Sonovbetch.

slaveworker#121667 wrote:If i have son in these times. I call him Unlucki. Unlucki Sonovbetch.

Actually, and in support of your post, if I had a son, or a daughter, I would name either of them Comrade Goofinov!

It's a trend these days, dontchaknow?

Red Square wrote:These Obama condoms are real.

Unreal!

(Jeesh, I wish I had thought of this, I'm must be in the wrong business!)

Your pal,

Sandra Fluke Pamalinsky

We should demand that " The Supreme Whatever " should allow The Cube's Drygoods Store # 86 to carry these, so that we all could obtain for ourselves a little keepsake that is symbolic of Dear Leader's treatment of America.

Krasnodar wrote:We should demand that " The Supreme Whatever " should allow The Cube's Drygoods Store # 86 to carry these, so that we all could obtain for ourselves a little keepsake that is symbolic of Dear Leader's treatment of America.

Whew! I feel so much better now, Kraz. (I was startin' to hyperventilate!)

Good to hear from you!

My son would be a white hispanic, like after ABC News photoshops a brown hispanic. He would also be a very good shot especially when shooting innocent, helpless little black children for no known reason... except maybe to swipe their Skittles...

Saw it on the Internet:

If I had a dog, it would look like the one Obama ate.

This Dog Scandal (Doggy Gate) is not going away. (The hoodie is just too much and proves racism. What next, claims that the dog is not working?) Source

From If I had a dog he would look like the dog Obama ate.

Good day comrades .

Hey, I saw that photo. That was comrade Anthony Brown sitting on President Obeyme's lap last week in Maryland.

If Obama had a son, he'd look like Micah Johnson.

Red Square wrote:

The media controversy sparked by Barack Obama's statement 'If I had a son, he'd look like Trayvon' has prompted many prominent citizens to come to his defense by declaring, in the I-am-Spartacus fashion, "If I also had a son...":

Nancy Pelosi: "... he'd owe China $256,000,000 before he reaches puberty."

George Soros: "... he'd own a chauffeured tricycle."

Bill Clinton: "... he'd know what 'is' is."

Hillary Clinton: "I already have a son and his name is Bill."

Michael Bloomberg: "... he wouldn't be eating trans fats - or he'd be out of the will."

Harry Reid: "... he wouldn't smell like the unwashed masses visiting the Capitol."

Sheriff Joe Arpaio: "... his birth certificate wouldn't have PDF layers."

Donald Trump: "What Sheriff Joe said."

Al Sharpton: "... he wouldn't be a honky or one of them Jews."

Michael Moore: "... I wouldn't eat him as long as he doesn't get between me and the fridge."

Joe Biden: "I have a son? Have we met?"

Rosie O'Donnell: "... I'd keep him in a cage and train him to attack toupees, and then I'd invite Donald Trump over and open the cage."

Oprah: "... I'd keep him away from Rosie O'Donnell."

Anita Dunn: "... I'd name him Mao Tse-Dunn."

Eric Holder: "... I'd tell him he was conceived during fast and furious sex, then I'd smuggle him into Mexico."

Occupy Theoretician Elizabeth Warren: "... I'd wait for him to crap all over himself, then throw him at the police."

Debbie Wasserman Schultz: "... I'd hire Bill Maher to teach him manners and Anthony Weiner to teach him photography."

Safe Schools Czar Kevin Jennings: "I'd teach him to have safe sex - with me."

HHS Director Katherine Sebelius: "I'd give him an exemption from ObamaCare."

Mitt Romney: "I'd give him an exemption from RomneyCare."

John Edwards: "... I'd bequeath to him my secret to silky, sensuous, and coquettish man-hair."

Al Gore: "... I'd cut his feet off so I wouldn't have to worry about his carbon footprint."

Science Czar John Holdren: "I can't have a son; I cut my testicles off so I can sleep at night not worrying about overpopulation."

An anonymous Georgetown Law Student: "Having blown my entire trust fund on contraceptives, I damn well better not get pregnant with a son!"

Supreme Court Justice Ruth Ginsberg: "... I'd send him off to South Africa, they have a better constitution."

CNN host Soledad O'Brien: "... I'd read him fairy tales, starting with Critical Race Theory."

MSNBC host Chris Mathews: "... I'd tell him bedtime stories of the adventures of the heroic knight, Sir Barry Obama, unless instructed otherwise."

Robert F. Kennedy XXXLXVII: "... I'd name him 'Robert F. Kennedy XXXLXVIII.'"

Charlie Sheen: "... I'd pay him to go away."

____________________
Additional reporting by Robert Fine

This is genius. got me lol