12/26/2012, 12:59 pm
Formal Appeal to Comrade Red Square, People's Director of the Department of Unanimity and Visual Agitation and Chairman of the Plenary Committee for Oversight of Intellectual Security and Standardization
Comrade Red Square!
In order to fully implement the Socialist dream of an Amerikan proletarian utopia, it is imperative that party organs must identify and properly subjugate conflicting intellectual concepts that may cause those with non-conformist tendencies to question the Party and its efforts to improve the condition of the people through Socialism.
As we all know, correct thought, led by the Party, is the only thing that will keep the people progressing in the correct direction. Therefore, the Party must properly indoctrinate the proletariat so that cooperation can be voluntarily achieved and the Socialist vision can be quickly and efficiently implemented.
Besides, having to forcibly liquidate non-conformists is embarrassing and expensive. Therefore, in keeping with your most recent example, I propose that the Plenary Committee create a Directorate to collect examples of intellectual non-conformity, such as:
Corporations are poisoning our food with preservatives and GMOS – but we are living longer than we ever have. In order to live longer, we must eat healthy food – but food without additives is what our ancestors ate and did not live as long. Our ancestors had unhealthy lives, and so the government helped regulate our food to make it healthier - allowed all the unhealthy preservatives and GMOS to get into our food
For the sake of the masses in need of proper indoctrination for their own welfare, I appeal to the Department to collect these falsehoods and properly expose them to public ridicule!
Comrade Red Square!
In order to fully implement the Socialist dream of an Amerikan proletarian utopia, it is imperative that party organs must identify and properly subjugate conflicting intellectual concepts that may cause those with non-conformist tendencies to question the Party and its efforts to improve the condition of the people through Socialism.
As we all know, correct thought, led by the Party, is the only thing that will keep the people progressing in the correct direction. Therefore, the Party must properly indoctrinate the proletariat so that cooperation can be voluntarily achieved and the Socialist vision can be quickly and efficiently implemented.
Besides, having to forcibly liquidate non-conformists is embarrassing and expensive. Therefore, in keeping with your most recent example, I propose that the Plenary Committee create a Directorate to collect examples of intellectual non-conformity, such as:
- Americans are getting sicker - but we are living longer than we ever have
- We are living longer than we ever have - but our medical system is broken by corporate greed
- Our medical system is broken by corporate greed - but corporations will be in charge of the new system
- Corporations will be in charge of the new system - but government supervision will help us get healthier
- Government supervision will help us get healthier - but the government has been supervising us before while we were getting sicker
Corporations are poisoning our food with preservatives and GMOS – but we are living longer than we ever have. In order to live longer, we must eat healthy food – but food without additives is what our ancestors ate and did not live as long. Our ancestors had unhealthy lives, and so the government helped regulate our food to make it healthier - allowed all the unhealthy preservatives and GMOS to get into our food
For the sake of the masses in need of proper indoctrination for their own welfare, I appeal to the Department to collect these falsehoods and properly expose them to public ridicule!
