The People's Cube - Political Satire

Dear Comrades,

Comrade Party Chairman and President Barack Barackovich Obama summoned all members of the Party's Committee of Poet Laureates to prepare 19 Executive Orders on Gun Control, which are expected to be added to the new State Common Core mandatory reading list for all students starting in the Third Grade, that will then be implemented largely through the new Obamacare Program.

Joe Biden: White House eying 19 executive actions on guns

Deputies from the People's Congress have been gathering with Comrade Vice-President Josef Iosifovich Biden to offer their support and gratitude to Comrade President Barack Barackovich for taking up the matter personally and not allowing the important task of universal pacification to be slowed by ‘democratic' processes. The Masses, through their unanimous election of B. B. Obama, have vested him with the Will of the People, and so he does not have to be concerned with using regular channels for what should normally be a legislative process.

The Executive Orders will largely place the matter of bourgeois violence under the Department of Mandatory Heath and Human Services Office of Disease Control, which will take measures to identify members of the populace in need of medical treatment associated either with violence or the overwhelming need to own guns.

These citizens, often known as ‘Bitter Clingers,' use their weapons ownership and superstitious religious practices to treat their mental disorders.

The Party, in its compassion for the Masses, has resolved itself to provide mandatory psychological treatment until all citizens are free from such confining delusions and open themselves to the warm embrace of State protection.

Other Executive Orders being prepared will place counter-revolutionary activity (i.e. weapons ownership) under the Department of Social Justice.

Centralization of citizen information is the key to providing the People with adequate protection from the threats of reactionary elements, otherwise known as gun owners, who refuse to follow the Party's direction toward the complete pacification of the workers and peasants of the USSA.

By placing all public information in the hands of the Department of Social Justice, all citizens may be equally monitored and evaluated for potential counter-revolutionary activity through local arms of the State Security Services.

Comrade President Barack Barackovich is also contemplating the outlawing of high-capacity magazines (those containing more than three to seven rounds) and requiring citizens to follow a permitting process.

The Committee for Universal Felon Voter Access has been assured that the Department of Social Justice will not attempt to force citizens to produce identification during elections, for fear of discrimination against oppressed minorities recognized by the Directorate for Minorities Ranking of the Office of the Commissar for Equality Enforcement.

The People should rejoice that our Glorious Leader, Comrade President Barack Barackovich, is setting this important precedent for social action through Executive Orders. Future presidents will likely rely on this important feature of State authority to further the goals of pacification and collectivization.

We should soon expect more State literary gifts that will help not only inspire our children to read, but also result in the de-Kulakization of the USSA through repossession of Kulak properties and proper redistribution of the People's Wealth.

Down with slow legislative processes!
Forward to Social Progress through Executive Orders!

Faithfully submitted to the Collective of the People's Cube,
Comrade Nomenklatura-climber
Proletarian Red-noser

From The San Marino Real Estate Report -

Neighborhood Update – Poet's Quarter, by Carrie Benuska

There is something very poetically ironic about this description:

Nestled between Sierra Madre Boulevard and the Huntington Library with California Boulevard toward its upper edge, Poet's Quarter is a divinely fantastic neighborhood....

Poet's Quarter does not see a lot of turnover, because many residents have lived in their gorgeous homes for decades.... Who would blame them? Living in this wonderful part of town is a true blessing. Currently there is only one listing in the Poet's Quarter at a listing price of $3,288,800.

Chances are, these residents will soon be seeing some "poetic justice."

Speaking of which, does anyone else think this Poetry Slam poster looks like a bloody massacre?

Oh yes. Here's our famous poet laureate in action:

[img]/images/Che_Ban_People_Not_Guns.png[/img]

Dear Comrade Director,

It is good to see that the State is exempting these Poets from the de-Kulakization Program. We all know that writers and poets are not paid well by Capitalist standards. Clearly, their identification with the suffering of the Masses, through their use of Che Posters, should exempt them from mandatory collectivization... up until their services are no longer required by the Party.

At a news conference on Monday, exactly one month after the school massacre in Newtown, Conn., Mr. Obama said a task force led by Vice President Joseph R. Biden Jr. had “presented me now with a list of sensible, common-sense steps that can be taken to make sure that the kinds of violence we saw at Newtown doesn't happen again." He added: “My starting point is not to worry about the politics. My starting point is to focus on what makes sense, what works.”

So naturally, His Obamaness will enact a proclamation to ban the importation "assault weapons"* and possession of high capacity magazines because neither of these items were used in the Sandy Hook shooting. In addition, he will announce a DOJ crackdown on private gun sales and selling guns at gun shows, mainly because neither of the weapons used at Sandy Hook were acquired in this manner. If we are lucky, he will ram home a complete ban on the ownership of assault weapons and see to their confiscation, reversing the ugly trend** that has taken place since the assault weapon ban lapsed in 2004.

___________________________________
*An Assault Weapon is defined as any projectile weapon capable of resembling a military weapon, because things like a bayonet lug and flash supressor make the bullet the weapon fires a whole lot more dangerous.

**Since the Assault Weapons Ban lapsed in 2004, incidents of gun violence have decreased dramatically, thus endangering a source of immediate crises needing Party exploitation. We must preserve this vital political resource by once again disarming the law abiding citizen to make sure the predators have sufficiently defenseless environments in which to operate.

Comrades, does it not warm your hearts to know that, even now, beautiful facilities like Bitter Clinger Estates, pictured here, are being established all across our glorious country?

In these lovely retreats, where the non-politically-correct and thought criminals will lodge for re-education, one of the main curricula will include Party Poetry™, which the residents will be forced to repeat have the opportunity to learn, in a peaceful, non-intrusive environment.

It's a beautiful thing, comrades.

Hopefully one of those poets is addressing the problem of Pyrodex. Each can could contain hundreds of loads to fuel a deadly musket rampage. There should be a five load limit per can; same for sales of round ball.

Dear Comrade Anyer,

Don't worry: with the nationalization of the USSA's raw materials, lead will not longer be available without a background check and a permit, rpoving that it is for use to meet the Needs of the People!

I heard Dear Leader is going to surround himself with children tomorrow for his civilian disarmament announcement! So progressive! Glorious!

https://washingtonexaminer.com/article/ ... PXfiWedUxE

White House Press Secretary Jay Carney announced this afternoon that President Obama will unveil a “concrete package” of gun control proposals including assault weapons bans, high capacity ammunition magazine bans, and closing loopholes on background checks.

Carney said that the president will be joined by Vice President Joe Biden as well as children who wrote to the president after the Newtown shootings.

“They will be joined by children around the country expressing their concerns about gun violence and school safety, along with their parents,” Carney confirmed.

The press conference will take place Wednesday at 11:45 a.m.

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:Comrades, does it not warm your hearts to know that, even now, beautiful facilities like Bitter Clinger Estates, pictured here, are being established all across our glorious country?

In these lovely retreats, where the non-politically-correct and thought criminals will lodge for re-education, one of the main curricula will include Party Poetry™, which the residents will be forced to repeat have the opportunity to learn, in a peaceful, non-intrusive environment.

It's a beautiful thing, comrades.

The Bitter Klinger Facelift.

Out with the OLD; IN with the NEW — Plantation, that is. See what improvements can be made (with a little Government help?)

The idea that governance in society is something done by State dictate is one of the most ugly and pathetic lies of collectivism. Self government isn't a vote for which man is to decide or which ideas are to be foisted on society by whom but is so organic to governance that only laws against actually harming a person or their property by another, provable in court by evidence are what the State is interested in. In other words, the Rule of Law is the only kind of mechanism of governance that the State is in charge of. All else are dictates. Regulations and Legislative Acts are dictates and have no place in free society.

But, you damn commies have a million and one rationalizations for why we can't live in a free society and you damn commies have a million and one dictates to make certain we don't live in a free society where the self government of our selves can reign and civilization flourish.

$.$. Halliburton wrote:But, you damn commies have a million and one rationalizations for why we can't live in a free society and you damn commies have a million and one dictates to make certain we don't live in a free society where the self government of our selves can reign and civilization flourish.

Comrade. It simply wouldn't be fair™.

It boggles der mind to see the kollektive so distrusting of the kare and protektion of the State! Do they aktually believe they have a right to such instruments of destruktion!? Unbelievable! Such defiance of State mandate must be quashed swiftly and harshly as a message to the masses!