The People's Cube - Political Satire

Dear Comrades,

The Civil Rights Limitation Commissar of the Department of Homeland Security has ruled that all electronic devices carried by citizens of our glorious USSA are collective property of the State and subject to inspection while citizens are in public places.

Under this new definition of ownership, the State retains the right to inspect all electronic devices which citizens are ordinarily allowed to possess for personal use, since public safety demands that such bourgeois ideas as ‘private property' are not only anti-progressive, but potentially hazardous.

The State guarantees the safety and security of all citizens, and we should all feel glad that our State Security apparatuses are vigilant in protecting us from violent reactionary elements that lurk amongst us.

By guarding our borders, patrolling our airports, and searching our trains for rogue intelligentsia who may be blogging about offensive topics or oppressing women and minorities through hate speech, the Department of Homeland Security will use this new definition of property to keep us even more closely guarded.

By using ‘suspicionless' searches, which do not question the loyalty of citizens being detained by authorities, the State can determine a citizen's electronic activities and record findings in his Department of Justice file using your Social Security number. Those citizens with questionable interests or activities can either be arrested immediately or released for further monitoring by Security organs.

Comrades, we can even look forward to a time where DHS personnel will inspect our personal electronic devices for such violations as copyright infringements, illegal duplication of restricted materials, or agitational propaganda from counter-revolutionary organizations like the National Rifle Association, a known hate group and advocate of anti-pacification activities!

People who keep secrets have something to hide, and so we who are honest and loyal citizens should welcome inspection to prove our cooperativeness and allegiance to our fellow peasants and workers.

Protect our glorious nation through the abolition of private property!
Denounce citizens who keep secrets from the State!

Faithfully submitted to the Collective of the People's Cube,
Comrade Nomenklatura-climber
Dialectical Progressivism Translator

Is our government pager-friendly?

No comrade, ALL electronic devises MUST be placed in the bucket. Failure to comply will at the VERY least force our benevolent comrades in the TSA to repeat themselves AND they will bring out the hose to teach you a lesson you will not soon forget!

The poet Beria once said that 'compliance is like a moisturizing lotion for the Socialist spirit.' I must get one of those TSA-approved buckets...

[img]/images/clipart/Prog_Off.gif[/img]
As the left falls more and more into the growing circle of State authority, they are awakening. Unfortunately, dupes seldom notice the truth till it's too late to resist.

Denounce citizens who keep secrets from the State!
Achieve peace and security by abolishing private property!

It's good to know the Inner Parties VIP communication devices are excluded, no?

I don't mind the TSA searches so much as the feeling that they are just going through the motions. I mean a scented candle and some flowers would be nice, you know? Make me feel like a lady for once.

Gulag 4 Alfred wrote:It's good to know the Inner Parties VIP communication devices are excluded, no?

Copy of Biden-ear.jpg

Gulag 4 Alfred wrote:It's good to know the Inner Parties VIP communication devices are excluded, no?

Copy of Biden-ear.jpg

Ah, it's good to see Comrade Biden with his shoe to his ear instead of in his mouth for once.

All privy stall doors must be removed or remain open in case of electronic communication.

Is it possible to incorporate one way mirrors in urinals? I must look into this...(for the Children)

This calls for a caption contest. The picture below previously seemed to be deserving a caption out of the "Employee of the Month" category.

In light of the new developments, however, electronic communications are getting closer towards the category of bodily functions that require complete privacy.

The new caption could well be "Emergency Data Dump in Progress."

Speaking of data dumps - Advisory for all thought criminals: Keep your thoughts to yourself!

Digital Security - Executive Order "Don't get caught with your pants down".