The People's Cube - Political Satire

Dear Comrades,

Comrade Party Chairman and President Barack Barackovich Obama has announced sweeping plans to reform the American education system by introducing new socialization programs for 4-year-olds. The new program, now being referred to as the ‘Young Knuckleheads Federal Education Initiative' will teach post-toddlers the basics of obedience to authority and openness to indoctrination, which will help them become successful students later in their educational process.

The term ‘knuckleheads' comes from the distinctive salute the program has adopted from other successful international education programs. Given the proven effectiveness of early passivity training throughout the world, the Young Knuckleheads Initiative is expected to continue the standards of excellent that our teachers and educational professionals have provided to our glorious USSA.

Since 4-year-olds are developmentally unable to begin reading government literature or learning their numbers, our States heroic and dedicated educational professionals will be developing programs to teach our Young Socialists the skills they will need to succeed under Party supervision.

Along with learning patriotic songs extolling the virtues of the Party and our leadership, children will be trained to march and participate in group activities that focus on team-building. Behavior modification experts will also develop special curricula to help educators develop conformism and compliance from children suffering from inadequate parents or natural resistance issues.

Children are impressionable, and their characters are not fully developed until six years of age according to experts, and so the President is hoping that through early intervention, schools can help shape the character and disposition of American students in a way more favorable to the Collectivist lifestyle advocated by the Party and labor union movement.

Since there is still a great deal of inequality in America due to centuries of Imperialism and decadence under Capitalism, such programs are essential to guarantee the complete equality of the next generation, so that all children can assume the roles set for them by the Party through future Five-Year-Plans. Children who are not trained in the virtues of obedience and compliance will not be able to fully share in the joys of Socialism, since they will be unable to meet the requirements and duties of citizenship.

The State wishes to minimize the number of citizens who must be compelled through non-voluntary means into compliance with State directive. The Young Knuckleheads Initiative promises to help children rise to the grand vision given to them by the Proletariat through our Socialist state.

Support the Young Knuckleheads!
Help the Party shape the children of today into the workers and peasants of tomorrow!

Faithfully submitted to the Collective of the People's Cube,
Comrade Nomenklatura-climber
Dialectical Progressivism Translator

A is for Activist Knucklehead

In order to be a true success, early childhood [brainwashing] education must start no later than the third birthday.

It is in these trenches that the Kulturekampf will be decided. Vouchers and localism or Goobermit driven homogenization? The trenches extend from collegia to pre-K but if only the parents gain exclusive control the statist will fail.

This program is essential to our "Kids Say the Progressivest Things" photo-ops with Dear Leader Obama.

[img]/images/clipart/Prog_Off.gif[/img]
Be afraid...

[img]/images/clipart/Prog_On.gif[/img]
Rejoice...

Dedhedvedev wrote:This program is essential to our "Kids Say the Progressivest Things" photo-ops with Dear Leader Obama.

I love that show!
So much more equal than the old stogy pre-USSA cold war version.

The reactionary right-wing educator Mary Grabar at the subversive Dissident Prof website linked to this editorial in her latest article -

We the People Fighting Common Core!

... which she illustrated with the 1895 painting titled "Mental Calculations" by Nikolay Bogdanov-Belsky, who could have been the Russian equivalent of Norman Rockwell if he hadn't rejected communism and chose to die in exile, forgotten and unappreciated.

Try as I might I do not understand the methodology of that example of Common Core math at the link. If you want to find out how many more books Madison has than Leslie then, I was taught, you simply subtract Leslie's books from Madison's: 25-20=5. I can't make head or tail out the example sets of numbers and how to use them to do simple math. Does anyone understand what the hell Common Core math is?

$.$. Halliburton wrote:Try as I might I do not understand the methodology of that example of Common Core math at the link. If you want to find out how many more books Madison has than Leslie then, I was taught, you simply subtract Leslie's books from Madison's: 25-20=5. I can't make head or tail out the example sets of numbers and how to use them to do simple math. Does anyone understand what the hell Common Core math is?

Common Core math is that math which defies common sense, and contains nothing at its core. It is very possibly the reason we are tied with Latvia in international math proficiency ratings at #25. (I suspect many students won't understand what I just said, because we are ranked #12 in reading)

Comrades, we have enough to keep us busy with all the Cultural Diversity Training and Life Style Sensitivity Indoctrination, not to mention School Color Condom Distribution. Math of any type, common or exotic, will need to wait its turn. In the mean time, if counting is necessary, don't deal with numbers in excess of your total number of toes and fingers.