The People's Cube - Political Satire

In light of Magpul's resistance to the Common Sense(TM) magazine capacity and gun control laws being pushed in the People's Republic of Kolorado, President Obama has ordered a drone strike in order to prevent them from leaving and taking jobs with them.

Dear Leader is quoted as saying "It is imperative that Magpul understand they cannot simply object to policies and laws that I approve of, nor can they threaten the economy of a progressive state by threatening to leave. This sort of economic terrorism must be stopped. "

President Obama went on to further say "Not that it really matters, these baby killing military grade assault clips, and the tactical assault stocks that they make should not be sold to civilians. I support the 2nd amendment, but this is going too far. We will nationalize Magpul, and restrict their products only to military and law enforcement, as opposed to untrained civilians."

But Comrade Colonel-What's more important: Magpul or The Children? Or maybe it's that the move "...could cost hundreds of jobs and upward of $85 million in potential spending this year." Da?

I have it on good unsubstantiated rumor that drone strikes have also been ordered against Larue Tactical, Cheaper That Dirt, Olympic Arms, Extreme Firepower LLC, Templar Custom, York Arms, and possibly Spikes Tactical, for no longer selling any weaponry to law enforcement that can't be sold to civilians, starting with the state of New York.

Who do these people/companies think they are, anyway??

Clearly there are too many targets for the Guvmint to handle alone. We will need to recruit volunteers with homemade devices to eliminate dissenters.

I am full of Progressive joy that we, the Special Elitist Peoples of the Cube, know what BO's drone policy truly is! Long live the King!!

Anyer Marx wrote:We will need to recruit volunteers with homemade devices to eliminate dissenters.

You really didn't think all those flies hovering around Dear Leader were just flies did you?

Whew, for a moment I thought the headline read, "Obama orders drone strike against Nazgul."

One Obamaphone to rule them all, One Obamaphone to find them,
One Obamaphone to bring them all and to the Democrats bind them.