The People's Cube - Political Satire

Greetings and very Soviet salutations, Komrades!

By now you have all heard about the terrible injustices and atrocities committed by the suburban-kulak George Zimmerman, who in a fit of racial animosity set out from his house some rainy winter's eve to assassinate the first minority child with Skittles he could find. It didn't take him long to find just the person he was looking for: a small child named Trayvon, with a striking resemblance of the current President.

ZimmVermin thought that he would get off the hook because he and the Sheriff had both gone to police academy together, but little did he know that thatWhite BlackAfrican-American Knight of Justice, Al Sharpton, would come riding in to save the day. ZimmVermin was arrested and sent to court.

But what should have been an instant hanging turned into a judicial circus. All this talk of "innocent until proven guilty," "right to remain silent," "right to impartial judge and jury," "no double jeopardy," "evidence,"…. we have none of this in Soviet Russia. Why do we need it here?

But even though the bourgeoisie jury found the ZimmVermin innocent, there is still hope for Social Justice! After great social agitation by the National Association for the Advancement of Certain People, the Great and Honorable Eric Holder has announced that he will review the case under the Civil Rights Division of the Justice Department in the name of Social Justice.

It is suspected that Holder will use a new Progressive tool to decide ZimmVermin's guiltiness or double-plus guiltiness called the Social Justice Race Card.

Unlike other race cards which are often used indiscriminately and without much thought or reason, this Social Justice Race Card is based upon past atrocities and allows the Judge Purger to determine guilt or innocence merely by comparing the colors on the card with the guilty party's skin tone. INSTANT JUSTICE!

The Social Justice Race Card traces its origin back to the 1970s with the Black Panther Movement and borrows greatly from the Sherwin Williams Paint sample card. In recent years, it has gotten more attention under the SmartJustice™ division of the Obama Justice Department, which seeks to find more efficient ways to promote social justice. The administration has also indicated its intentions of applying the Social Justice Race Card on a global scale for the allotment of valuable Karbon Kredits.

Censor's Editor's Note: Sherwin Williams, although partially credited with the creation of the Social Justice Race Card, in no way supports its use or implementation. *SPIT!*

We are also pleased to see plans for the "Double Jeopardy Civil Suit". We believe the seriousness of the charges against Zimmerman warrant suits beyond civil and the legal system must be amended to allow for additional public suits, common good suits, fairness suits and any number of other suits until our desired result is achieved.

And what a relief it is to be done with that silly, antiquated single jury system.

WE DEMAND (another) SHOW TRIAL!!!

And to insure the People's outcome, there will be a change of venue to southern Kalifornica where it doesn't matter that the attorney who is supposed to lose his client's case blows it intentionally so his friends won't desert him and he can get reservations for lunch under his own name. But none of that matters. What does is, Zimmerman is Not a celebrity, and the guy he capped Is, because the People adore such agents of expropriation once referred to as Thieves by all nonprogs. Want of Justice is contingent on what emotional satisfaction the People want. There's still two weeks before the network anchors go on vacation. So...?

I was able to fix [color=#C0392B]ThePeoplesComrade's[/color] observation when he wrote:We are also pleased to see plans for the "Double Jeopardy Civil Suit". We believe the seriousness of the charges against Zimmerman warrant suits beyond civil and the legal system must be amended to allow for additional public suits, common good suits, fairness suits, orange suits and any number of other suits until our desired result is achieved.

And what a relief it is to be done with that silly, antiquated single jury system.

I was able to fix Comrade Putout's comment when she wrote:I'm going to like the way you finally look. I guarantee it.

I've heard that some ladies enjoy spending time around men in prison. I believe that could be arranged, comrade.

I was also capable of fixing [color=#C0392B]Captain Craptek's[/color] comment when he wrote:I've heard that some ladies enjoy spending time around men squirrels in prison. I believe that could be arranged, comrade.

Comrade Putout wrote:I've heard that some ladies enjoy spending time around men squirrels in prison. I believe that could be arranged, comrade.

I'm looking forward to this trip, Comrade Putout. When do we leave?

the biker dudes on the left seem to be close friends...