The People's Cube - Political Satire

Dear Comrades,

Out of his mercy and compassion, Comrade Party Chairman and Future President Barack Barackovich Obama has commuted the death sentences of more than 1 million insurance policies that were scheduled for liquidation under the Affordable Healthcare Act.

However, the commutations are only temporary, and so citizens will be comforted in knowing that their substandard insurance policies that have been temporarily permitted to continue will be executed in a year.

By use of a Presidential Edict, the commutations were so ordered so that the workers and peasants of the USSA would have more time to adjust to the new realities of Healthcare Collectivization, which is difficult for many of the Proletariat to grasp after years of Capitalism oppression.

Many kulaks have been shocked to find that their policies under-confiscated their hoarded wealth, and so the cancellations gave the State the opportunity to impose new policies by which healthcare Means of production could be extracted from their greedy grasp and given to those of the Working Class in the most desperate of conditions.

The White Fortress has promised that executions will most definitely resume after the temporary commutation, in keeping with Comrade Obama's promise to the USSA, “If I like your healthcare plan, you can keep your healthcare plan. Period.” Liquidated policies are those not in keeping with Comrade Obama's wishes of better plans for citizens.

Next year, citizens will once again say goodbye to their retrograde policies and embrace the new Obamacare policies that will be fairly priced according to the Class Preference Tables of the Department of Compulsory Health and Mandatory Human Services. Those citizens with acceptable policies will immediately receive their new, fair-share pricing this year.

Insurance Commissars from the various Oblasts are busy working to reverse the executions by issuing new Terminations of Policy Terminations. Those citizens who have received Policy Termination notices will receive the new Termination of Policy Termination Notices in 4-6 weeks, depending on processing times and possible computer glitches due to Gremlin activity.

Because of the uncertainties at this time, citizens are requested to not become ill or have accidents during this difficult time for State authorities. Citizens seeking medical treatment during this time are subject to investigation by the Department of Homeland Security and the Internal Revenue Security Service.

Obama shows mercy by commuting death sentences for insurance policies! Termination of Policy Termination Notices reveal the compassion of the President!

Faithfully submitted to the Collective of the People's Cube,
Comrade Nomenklatura-climber
Dialectical Progressivism Translator

And for those plans already terminated in anticipation of Law, will they be raised from the dead by the hand of the Exalted One? Oh, all-merciful is he!

(Well, at least partly merciful, since resurrected and commuted ones will be rekilled next year after elections.)

RedDiaperette wrote:And for those plans already terminated in anticipation of Law, will they be raised from the dead by the hand of the Exalted One? Oh, all-merciful is he!

(Well, at least partly merciful, since resurrected and commuted ones will be rekilled next year after elections.)

Not since Lazarus of Bethany has such a miracle been done. The messiah emerges from the pit with the resurrected heathcare insurance policies!

It's gratifying to see Dear Leader's plan unfolding so smoothly before our eyes - thus proving once again that proper planning and execution are the keys to success.

This picture holds a striking resemblance to the celebration of Affordable Healthcare Act by the Lumpenproletariat in the USSA.

THE RADICAL'S ARMS: Satirical cartoon from England lampooning the excesses of the French Revolution as symbolized through the guillotine

Oh joy. The Terror has been momentarily interrupted due to the upcoming elections.

We should have renewed confidence in the Affordable Tax Act, The One's "signature law," that changes with his signature by Imperial Order! A law that allows The One to resurrect dead insurance policies, notwithstanding the greedy, evil, kapitalistic insurance companies who would keep these poor substandard policies 6 feet under for the gain to their <spit> shareholders <spit-spit>. All hail modern healthcare laws that can heal themselves!