3/30/2014, 9:31 pm
Comrades, it has come to my attention that an effort to control liberate the masses by establishing clearly-designated "Gun Free Zones™" has met with, well, less-than-equal results.
I theorize that it has in part to do with a conflict in goals with our redistributive education agenda ("Communist Core™") to dumb-down pacify liberate the minds of the masses from excessive information load. I will let the appropriate committees examine that issue in greater detail, but for the time being, it is not unrealistic that the subjects dumbass laborers peasantry citizens should get the message of the below signage easily enough:
Alas, it seems to have the opposite effect, as some of our brethren are still caught up in the Spirit of the Revolution and are still prone to doing the exact opposite of what authority dictates them to do to live in an orderly and peaceful society.
Knowing the poverty limitations liberated-from-materialism economic model and taking into consideration the ensuing reduced unemployed occupationally sodomized liberated labor force, the Committee of Recognizing And Progressivizing Potentially Inadequate Endeavors (AKA the C.R.A.P.P.I.E. Initiative) has developed a cost-effective solution to this problem that requires no reinstallation of new signage.
In fact, it will leverage the talents of our idle indigent lazy-ass mooching newly-liberated street artists by outfitting them with cans of spray paint to slightly alter the original signs to something akin to the following:
It accomplishes three tasks at once:
1.) It creates jobs for the unemployed.
2.) It will certainly reduce the amount of bloodshed violence crime unrevolutionary meanness that has been an unfortunate by-product of these zones (a C.R.A.P.P.I.E. study is still pending) by erasing the very thought of bringing in weapons to these areas!
3.) It reinforces our glorious ideal of free stuff in exchange for keeping our sorry heinies in power dom!
Win-win-win all around, comrades!
I theorize that it has in part to do with a conflict in goals with our redistributive education agenda ("Communist Core™") to dumb-down pacify liberate the minds of the masses from excessive information load. I will let the appropriate committees examine that issue in greater detail, but for the time being, it is not unrealistic that the subjects dumbass laborers peasantry citizens should get the message of the below signage easily enough:
Alas, it seems to have the opposite effect, as some of our brethren are still caught up in the Spirit of the Revolution and are still prone to doing the exact opposite of what authority dictates them to do to live in an orderly and peaceful society.
Knowing the poverty limitations liberated-from-materialism economic model and taking into consideration the ensuing reduced unemployed occupationally sodomized liberated labor force, the Committee of Recognizing And Progressivizing Potentially Inadequate Endeavors (AKA the C.R.A.P.P.I.E. Initiative) has developed a cost-effective solution to this problem that requires no reinstallation of new signage.
In fact, it will leverage the talents of our idle indigent lazy-ass mooching newly-liberated street artists by outfitting them with cans of spray paint to slightly alter the original signs to something akin to the following:
It accomplishes three tasks at once:
1.) It creates jobs for the unemployed.
2.) It will certainly reduce the amount of bloodshed violence crime unrevolutionary meanness that has been an unfortunate by-product of these zones (a C.R.A.P.P.I.E. study is still pending) by erasing the very thought of bringing in weapons to these areas!
3.) It reinforces our glorious ideal of free stuff in exchange for keeping our sorry heinies in power dom!
Win-win-win all around, comrades!