The People's Cube - Political Satire

It's Earth Day, Comrades!!! And you know what that means, yes? It's The Holy Prophet Vladimir Lenin's Birthday!!!!

Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday dear Comrade Lenin!
Happy Birthday to you!

This is nothing more than a coincidence, comrade, like the labeling of the Red and Blue states for Republican and Democrat respectively.

Zampolit Blokhayev wrote:It's Earth Day, Comrades!!! And you know what that means, yes? It's The Holy Prophet Vladimir Lenin's Birthday!!!!

Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday dear Comrade Lenin!
Happy Birthday to you!

Dedhedvedev wrote:This is nothing more than a coincidence, comrade, like the labeling of the Red and Blue states for Republican and Democrat respectively.

Comrade! Comrade! Comrade! Check The Current Truth™- Comrade Director Red Square himself has written on even back in 2005.... The official New York Times (courtesy of Comrade Square) posted in his article:


SO! Time to CELEBRATE!!!!

Earth Day! Established in 1970, for more than four decades, more than a generation, almost half a century, we've been sending a strong message to the masses worldwide that while it isn't too late yet, if we don't begin to discuss the necessity to come together very soon to start thinking about ways we can raise awareness of how much we care about the need to identify the necessary steps we require to take action now to save the planet from complete and utter annihilation at the hands of humanity, it WILL be too late!

Denial is futile! The debate is over! The science has long since been settled—and it has long since been settled that only ten years remain until catastrophe! Calamity! Cataclysm! Disaster! Destruction!

So join us, comrades, as we celebrate the 44th anniversary of the ten years we have left to save the Earth!

Earth Day Parade
Lyrics by Irving

In your commie earth day bonnet, with all the peoples awards upon it
You'll be the grandest commissarka in the earth day parade.
I'll be all in clover and when they look you over,
I'll be the proudest fellow in the commie earth day parade.
On the avenue, fifth avenue, the photographers will snap us,
And you'll find that you're in the youtube-gravure.
Oh, I could write a sonnet about your commie bonnet,
And of the commissarka I'm taking to the earth day parade.

I hope I don't get the shovel-whack if I can't make the math work out...

Even my worst state school arithmetic is bogging down at the 44th anniversary of ten years remaining....

I hope Dear Leader and Algore have this thinking already done.

Comrade Tovarichi, I am sure Commissarka Pinkie will be gentle. Remember though, there is no math in the Glorious World of Next Tuesday™! There are only feelings and fear to guide the masses, generously dispensed by Glorious leader with the help of Pinkies more-than-generous shovel whacks. Delicately dispensed by the Commissarka herself, which I intend to collect right after a few more rations of Beet Vodka.

At times like this I like to remember the immortal words of Neddie Seagoon:

"Lenin?"
"No, Len's out."

Dear Leader is doing his part! He could have burned much more the the 35,000 gallons of fuel and emitted more than the 375 tons of CO2 than he did, Comrades. How he sacrifices for us!

Khruelchev wrote:rations of Beet Vodka.

Precisely why we need the People's Arithmetic! How are we to know how much more ration to negotiate in order to achieve equality? How am I to know how many of my comrades' beets I need to put in my basket to meet my quota? I have to use a math to determine how much ill- gotten gain must be redistributed from Rethuglikkan teabaggers to my collective!

Fear not, Tovarich Tovarichi! The Party always takes care of their own.

Behold! The People's Math:

https://thepeoplescube.com/current-trut ... t1583.html

(Hint: the answer is "X.")

Tovarichi wrote:I hope I don't get the shovel-whack if I can't make the math work out...

Even my worst state school arithmetic is bogging down at the 44th anniversary of ten years remaining....

I hope Dear Leader and Algore have this thinking already done.

Comrade, you simply need to use Common Core Math™!

Observe:

1) From the four decades, take away one shovel of beet field dirt from each
2) Add 1 lobster each to the 1st and 3rd shovels full
3) Add 1 tamale each to the 2nd and 4th shovels full
4) Add a pinch of dirt from the White House Garden™
5) Now add the shovels full of dirt back into the decades

Viola! 44 years, Comrade!

Comrade Ivan, I saw the dates, tha's old skool, we noo skool up in here.

Observe the befuddlements caused by this mathematics:

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:Earth Day! Established in 1970, for more than four decades, more than a generation, almost half a century, we've been sending a strong message to the masses worldwide that while it isn't too late yet, if we don't begin to discuss the necessity to come together very soon to start thinking about ways we can raise awareness of how much we care about the need to identify the necessary steps we require to take action now to save the planet from complete and utter annihilation at the hands of humanity, it WILL be too late!

Denial is futile! The debate is over! The science has long since been settled—and it has long since been settled that only ten years remain until catastrophe! Calamity! Cataclysm! Disaster! Destruction!

So join us, comrades, as we celebrate the 44th anniversary of the ten years we have left to save the Earth!

For one brief instant I wondered if it might all be over before I finished your first glorious sentence - but I see I'm still here! Praise Obama!

Ah, my little bushy-tailed comrade! Be assured that lots of verbs and continued funding to bolster settled science is all that stands between Earth and its inevitable, imminent end!

Komissar Blogunov wrote:

I know this may be a thought crime, and I hesitate to mention it, but shouldn't Lenin lead by example and go green? How much energy is being used to refrigerate his carcass?

Oh, dear...this may get messy............

Well, he WAS cool before it was cool to be cool...

Pantheopianism.

--KOOK