The People's Cube - Political Satire

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There is a famous brainteaser, attributed to Einstein, which our reader Jeffrey has modified for our more politically correct, post-racial Obama presidency, where the objective is to sort the various groups of hyphenated-Americans.

It is said that only 2% of the world's population can solve the original brainteaser. Today it would be more politically correct to say that 99% should be able to solve the updated version. Let's see if you're the 99% or you're the reviled one-per-center.

Einstein-Obama Brainteaser

FACTS:

There is a row of five houses, each owned by a different hyphenated-American, with different occupations and recreational activities. Each has a favorite historical figure and a son pursuing higher education.

CLUES:

1. The Moslem-American supports his family as a taxicab driver.
2. The favorite historical figure of the English-American is Winston Churchill.
3. Gardening is the hobby of the Mexican-American.
4. The pimp lives next to the drug dealer.
5. The pimp enjoys competing in the knock-out game for recreation.
6. The most admired historical figure of the hyphenated American whose son is training to be a Navy Seal is Gandhi.
7. The hyphenated American who is a brain surgeon has a son at Stanford Medical School
8. The hyphenated American who lives in the middle house enjoys yoga in his spare time.
9. The African-American lives in the first house.
10. The hyphenated American whose most admired historical figure is Einstein lives next to the house with a son at Oxford University
11. The house with a son at Stanford Medical School is next to the hyphenated American whose most important historical figure is Mohamed
12. The hyphenated American whose favorite recreational activity is car-jacking no longer has a son. His son was killed in a drive-by shooting.
13. The Jewish-American has a son at Stern Business School.
14. The African-American lives next to the house whose owner runs a $20 billion hedge fund.
15. The house whose owner enjoys astronomy as a hobby lives next to the hyphenated American with a son at Oxford.

QUESTION:

In which house the most admired historical figure is Rodney King?

* * *

See if you can give a politically correct answer without thinking. Then compare it with the approved answer by clicking on the Mystery Item No.1.

Jokes like that are going to bring New Paradigm parachuting in.

It really has a 2 part answer:
1.) It's Bushes fault.
2.) That is soooo racist

Clinging to floating debris from a shipwreck in the Pacific, the currents finally take the sole survivor towards a unique island with twin volcanos, which he recognizes as an island populated by two tribes: The Nobles, who are kind to strangers and always tell the truth, and the Savages, who always kill strangers and always lie.

As he approaches the shore, the survivor sees a native, who shouts, "I am a Noble. You are welcome to come ashore here." The waves push the survivor further along the shore, and later he sees two natives standing on opposite sides of a waterfall with paths from each side leading to the shore.

He sees both natives waiving at him and gestering for him to follow the path to each of them respectively.

He hears the native on the right-hand side shout a greeting, but the sound of a crashing wave prevents him from understanding what the native said. He put his hand to his ear to indicate he had not heard well, but that native did not understand what that gesture meant.

Then he sees the native on the left point towards the native on the right and shout: "He said he's a Noble, but he is a savage and I am a Noble."

How can he know which native to trust?

(I hope my feeble mind didn't prevent me from accurately stating the puzzle.)

KOOK

KOOK wrote:Clinging to floating debris from a shipwreck in the Pacific, the currents finally take the sole survivor towards a unique island with twin volcanos, which he recognizes as an island populated by two tribes: The Nobles, who are kind to strangers and always tell the truth, and the Savages, who always kill strangers and always lie.

As he approaches the shore, the survivor sees a native, who shouts, "I am a Noble. You are welcome to come ashore here." The waves push the survivor further along the shore, and later he sees two natives standing on opposite sides of a waterfall with paths from each side leading to the shore.

He sees both natives waiving at him and gestering for him to follow the path to each of them respectively.

He hears the native on the right-hand side shout a greeting, but the sound of a crashing wave prevents him from understanding what the native said. He put his hand to his ear to indicate he had not heard well, but that native did not understand what that gesture meant.

Then he sees the native on the left point towards the native on the right and shout: "He said he's a Noble, but he is a savage and I am a Noble."

How can he know which native to trust?

(I hope my feeble mind didn't prevent me from accurately stating the puzzle.)

KOOK

Comrad Kook,

This island is inhabited by oppressors and the oppressed, and we must invade free them of their wealth and send them to camp for reeducation. Therefore trust none on the island and only trust the People's Social Republic.

Comrade Kook, this is an easy one. They are all natives and are therefore to be trusted.

The white invaders hoping to impose capitalist Jeffersonian Democracy upon free first nations peoples of color under the false flag of "manifest destiny" are not to be trusted.

Cleverness like this may be dangerous to your health.