9/3/2014, 10:33 am
[img]/images/Marijuana_Colorado_Poster.jpg[/img]
Dear Comrades,
Due to a $21 million shortfall in Collectivization goals for Colorado Oblast, the Colorado Regional Soviet has declared that all citizens under its jurisdiction are to immediately increase their consumption of State-sponsored marijuana products in order to meet the Party's plan for $33 million in taxes for the first six months of marijuana legalization.
Kulaks and those hoarding People's Dollars can expect a visit from the Oblast's Drug Enforcement Agency, which is tasked with enforcing consumption and checking each citizen's government-mandated supply of marijuana, both in smoke-able and non-smoke-able forms. Any citizen found without evidence of his receiving his fair share of marijuana will be brought to his local dispensary in order to meet his obligatory goals according to the Party's compulsory Marijuana Usage Chart.
Citizens must, on demand from law enforcement officials, produce receipts from State-regulated dispensaries demonstrating they have obtained their marijuana through government distribution centers, which also collect taxes for marijuana. Anyone found buying marijuana outside the State system, such as ‘black market' marijuana which does not bear the Oblast's tax stamp, may be required to work in one of the State's hemp fields for remedial labor.
Comrades who have already met their marijuana consumption goals are strongly encouraged to show their patriotism and commitment to social progress by increasing their purchases of marijuana above their set allotment. Those comrades with exceptionally high consumption can expect extra time off from assigned labor duties and increased food rations.
Faithfully submitted to the Collective of the People's Cube,
Comrade Nomenklatura-climber
Dialectical Progressivism Translator
Dear Comrades,
Due to a $21 million shortfall in Collectivization goals for Colorado Oblast, the Colorado Regional Soviet has declared that all citizens under its jurisdiction are to immediately increase their consumption of State-sponsored marijuana products in order to meet the Party's plan for $33 million in taxes for the first six months of marijuana legalization.
Kulaks and those hoarding People's Dollars can expect a visit from the Oblast's Drug Enforcement Agency, which is tasked with enforcing consumption and checking each citizen's government-mandated supply of marijuana, both in smoke-able and non-smoke-able forms. Any citizen found without evidence of his receiving his fair share of marijuana will be brought to his local dispensary in order to meet his obligatory goals according to the Party's compulsory Marijuana Usage Chart.
Citizens must, on demand from law enforcement officials, produce receipts from State-regulated dispensaries demonstrating they have obtained their marijuana through government distribution centers, which also collect taxes for marijuana. Anyone found buying marijuana outside the State system, such as ‘black market' marijuana which does not bear the Oblast's tax stamp, may be required to work in one of the State's hemp fields for remedial labor.
Comrades who have already met their marijuana consumption goals are strongly encouraged to show their patriotism and commitment to social progress by increasing their purchases of marijuana above their set allotment. Those comrades with exceptionally high consumption can expect extra time off from assigned labor duties and increased food rations.
Raise your goals for getting high, and lift up the Proletariat! Marijuana use is uplifting and Progressive!
Faithfully submitted to the Collective of the People's Cube,
Comrade Nomenklatura-climber
Dialectical Progressivism Translator
