The People's Cube - Political Satire

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"Oh Great Gore, help us!" Pleads a Boston Comrade as she digs her way out of snow, "Bring us the great prophesy."Another poor person without a snow blower for miles. Her bicycle under a yard of snow and more snow comes her way. What happened?

Boston was the where the spring came early and cherry blossoms sprang out just in time for Valentines, but where are the cherry blossoms now?

Old Man Winter is up with his shenanigans and hid those blossoms as well as some of our comrades under snow. He is not to blame. Old Man Winter needs to be reeducated.

Is it because of a natural phenomenon?

Oh please, it is global warming climate change caused by those dirty companies and their carbon emissions. This is war, I tell you - war, and they are to blame for so much winter. We must gather our pitchforks and torches, and stop this problem before it floods over.

You know the Great Gore did tell us what to do a few years ago; maybe he has more to offer.

Forward!

The avalanche of snow and frigid temps are BECAUSE of global warming.

Soviet Mike Komsomolets wrote:The avalanche of snow and frigid temps are BECAUSE of global warming.

Global warming caused glaciers, that is what the Great Gore told me.

Soviet Mike Komsomolets wrote:The avalanche of snow and frigid temps are BECAUSE of global warming.

You have that exactly Korrekt, Comrade Komsomolets.

I see that you have been paying attention during our daily broadcasts of propaganda Current Truth ™ .

An extra ration to you, Citizen! Would you prefer beets, or vodka?

Mikhail Lysenkomann wrote:
An extra ration to you, Citizen! Would you prefer beets, or vodka?

Professor, I have the best teachers. Thank you for your kind recognition. I prefer the beets, as you see I only consume vodka in moderation, much like the indiscretions of Bill Clinton. Besides my illegal still supply and ongoing provisional access bribery of officials assures that when and if I choose to dose my depression over Global Warming Climate Change Climate Disruption Carbon Pollution with the curative effects of distilled spirits I may.

Hammer and Loupe wrote:...Oh please it is global warming climate change caused by those dirty companies and their carbon emissions. This is war, I tell you war, and they are the blame why we have so much winter. We must gather our pitch forks and torches. We must stop this problem before it floods over. .....

Komrade Alexy Gorebachov's "global warming" narrative had to be revised by politikal scientists when many, including collective farmers and tank factory workers, began to notice that winters were becoming colder and more severe. I mean, when the frigid winter wind blows the ushanka from your head and starts making your face numb, it's difficult have korrekt thinking.

Now, thankfully, the new "climate change" narrative covers all situations: hot, warm, cold, dry, snowy, rainy, icy, windy, etc. Whatever the weather is doing out there, komrades, it's now far easier for the proletariat to align their thinking with the narrative. The message is now clear for everyone to understand: The US is evil, particularly its capitalist system. It is destroying the planet by creating and sustaining a free society with the highest standard of living in the world.

Komrades, we must support Komrade Glorious Leader, komrade Gorebachov, and other high party officials by doing our part to save the planet. Our goal is to cut carbon emissons by reducing our standard of living to that of the average Mexico City garbage dump resident. Once our carbon footprint is reduced, and we are living in poverty and total misery we and our children will be completely reliant on totalitarian government and easier to control "safe" in the world of Next Tuesday™.

Komrades, a number of people need re-education. Some people allowed the news to slip out, and to be published, that the Yale meeting on Global Warming was canceled due to the cold weather and snowfall.

Bill G wrote:Komrades, a number of people need re-education. Some people allowed the news to slip out, and to be published, that the Yale meeting on Global Warming was canceled due to the cold weather and snowfall.

What!?!?!! Scramble the Happy Keepers, we need to find who made this rumor.

We can pass out this handy guide.

Comrades,
The above measurer of degrees makes perfect sense. Lyin' Brian had a expose on this very point,but was unable to deliver the oration.
Realistically, the white area would float depending on what part of Siberia you are visiting. The Black Swan is nice at any time of year.

Just a refresher to accompany tomorrow's forecast, lest anyone lose faith in the Party™ line.

Konservative_Punk wrote:Just a refresher to accompany tomorrow's forecast, lest anyone lose faith in the Party™ line.

Well, komrade Punk, if Komrade Junk Science Minister Bill Nye says it's "proof," then you can bet your bottom ruble on it.

Gummipuppe wrote:

Konservative_Punk wrote:Just a refresher to accompany tomorrow's forecast, lest anyone lose faith in the Party™ line.

Well, komrade Punk, if Komrade Junk Science Minister Bill Nye says it's "proof," then you can bet your bottom ruble on it.

Speaking of PROOF, I just checked the label on my monthly ration of Beet Vodka, only to find that Komrade Bill Nye has testified as to the Proof of it's warming qualities as well, and I for one, wholeheartedly concur with his assessment. And furthermore, I'd not only stake my last ruble on it, but I'd bet the Kollektive Farm™ on it as well.

Konservative_Punk wrote:........ but I'd bet the Kollektive Farm™ on it as well.

Very well, komrade. Just don't buy the Kollektive Farm™ drinking it.

Gummipuppe wrote:

Konservative_Punk wrote:........ but I'd bet the Kollektive Farm™ on it as well.

Very well, komrade. Just don't buy the Kollektive Farm™ drinking it.

Well they don't call it No. 2 for nothing.