The People's Cube - Political Satire

**6/6/2015, 11:44 pm**

This thread has been created as a safe space for you to come out as trans, with full community acceptance, and no judgement, H8, bigotry or Christianity.

As a gesture of solidarity, join in and post your trans name below. #ProgPride!

**6/7/2015, 2:02 am**

**6/7/2015, 7:21 am**

My new name is Valerian "Val" Melatonin and I'm tired of this divisive BS. Can't we all just play with ourselves and STFU.

**6/7/2015, 10:01 am**

My name ... Jose Jimenez.*

Do not use pronouns at all. Pronouns are patriarchal impositions of logocentrism. Except pronouns such as "I," "me," "my," and "mine," which are fully approved by Dear Leader.

* [OFF] Cubists of a certain age will recognize this.

**6/7/2015, 10:13 am**

I choose the name "Billie Burke", Komrades! Not only does the name work both ways (depending on how I feel on a given day) but I look awesome in a pink sequin chiffon maxi dress:

**6/7/2015, 11:08 am**

Putin on the Ritz wrote:
Kommissar Uberdave wrote:I choose the name "Billie Burke", Komrades! Not only does the name work both ways (depending on how I feel on a given day) but I look awesome in a pink sequin chiffon maxi dress:

You are very Brave Comrade Uberdave.

I intend trying out each of the 56 and counting genders one at a time:

Confused by All the New Facebook Genders? Here's What They Mean

…And they call "Caitlen" Jenner "courageous"…. HUMPH!

**6/7/2015, 11:28 am**

Putin on the Ritz wrote:You are very Brave Comrade Uberdave.

There is soooo much bravery in this thread! It warms my trans heart.

Kommissar Uberdave wrote: Confused by All the New Facebook Genders? Here's What They Mean

…And they call "Caitlen" Jenner "courageous"…. HUMPH!

"Facebook offers 56 options. You can use up to 10 of them on your profile."

Why only 10? Some people may identify with 11 or more. Who is Facebook to decide the limits of someone's gender? Sounds transphobic to me.

**6/7/2015, 12:13 pm**

Olga Photoshopova wrote:"Facebook offers 56 options. You can use up to 10 of them on your profile."

Why only 10? Some people may identify with 11 or more. Who is Facebook to decide the limits of someone's gender? Sounds transphobic to me.

Tovarisch Photoshopva!

The only reason Fascistbook would not allow for more than 10 genders at a time can only be due to RIGHT-WING-HATE! ™

They must be denounced immediately and without fail!

**6/7/2015, 3:14 pm**

RedDiaperette wrote:My name ... Jose Jimenez.*

Do not use pronouns at all. Pronouns are patriarchal impositions of logocentrism. Except pronouns such as "I," "me," "my," and "mine," which are fully approved by Dear Leader.

* [OFF] Cubists of a certain age will recognize this.

Hey, I know how to Google!

**6/7/2015, 4:36 pm**

Ha! All this time you guys thought I was a girl!

Silly Comrades.

<prog off>

I tried to put visuals of my “real self” but, just could not do it. If you wish to take the time to help me, please feel free to do so. My Avatar is up for grabs! I had a hard time silhouetting it for prog usage.

Oh yes, please include my new name: Pamela Canal

Do mention that I can take you around the world, from the Pacific to the Atlantic and vice versa. (I go both ways)

Thanks, Comrades! I'm a bit deficient providing visuals for this.

Please don't feel obligated because of my Photoshop deficiencies. Just wanted to submit what I think is very funny. ; • )

**6/7/2015, 7:15 pm**

I know [color=#C0392B]Olga Photoshopova[/color] is really the brave one here even though she wrote:
There is soooo much bravery in this thread! It warms my trans heart.

.
(BTW - I retain a little water in my hips, lips, and buttocks when I'm lugging around a mattress.)

**6/7/2015, 7:28 pm**

Superb, Comrade Putout!

But, what about me? Is that too much to ask?

**6/7/2015, 10:36 pm**

Nonpretransgendered monogamous lesbian male (now that's Progressive™). I think I want to look like this...

**6/7/2015, 10:42 pm**

It's a good thing we have this post. Otherwise, some people might mistake this man for an example of true courage, and he was straight!

**6/7/2015, 11:02 pm**

**6/7/2015, 11:38 pm**

Comrade Putout wrote: .
(BTW - I retain a little water in my hips, lips, and buttocks when I'm lugging around a mattress.)

olga-photoshopova-is-eye-candy.jpg

Nice chainsaw placement. It makes me feel so gender fluid!

**6/8/2015, 12:15 am**

Having found his doppelgänger, [color=#C0392B]Komissar al-Blogunov[/color] wrote:
Nonpretransgendered monogamous lesbian male (now that's Progressive™). I think I want to look like this...

.
Where is his/your keyboard?
.

.

**6/8/2015, 7:06 am**

Ooh, this looks fun, I'll try...

Call me John. White heterosexual Christian bitter clinger job-holding, land-owning, tax-paying male.

Eeew.
I need to go wash my hands after typing that.

**6/8/2015, 8:31 am**

Comrade Putout wrote:
Having found his doppelgänger, [color=#C0392B]Komissar al-Blogunov[/color] wrote:
Nonpretransgendered monogamous lesbian male (now that's Progressive™). I think I want to look like this...

.
Where is his/your keyboard?
.

Komissar al-Blogunov-doppelganger.jpg
.

You know, that's a good question. I was out enjoying a day on the lake thinking about which comrade to denounce next when I laid down the keyboard for a moment, just a moment. I was enjoying the scenery when I heard a little commotion, and saw a squirrel in a tutu and sneakers take my keyboard overboard to use as a paddle board. I reached for the RPK, but he was gone before I could get a good shot.

And thanks for the cool shemagh, but now that leaves me conflicted. Is it sexist to call it a shemagh? Shouldn't there be an equal number of hemaghs and itmaghs? What about LGBTQmaghs? I need another day at the lake.

**6/8/2015, 8:35 am**

Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:Ooh, this looks fun, I'll try...

Call me John. White heterosexual Christian bitter clinger job-holding, land-owning, tax-paying male.

Eeew.
I need to go wash my hands after typing that.

The hate of that comment burned through my screen. You must have been joking. How did the "h" and "C" words get past the censors?

**6/8/2015, 10:18 am**

The goal is to call yourself something else, no?

<off>

I left off the part about being a Veteran, having two parents, and a graduate degree...

<on>

A good exercise in creative writing, I say.

**6/8/2015, 10:18 am**

Reminding us all, once again, what a big pain in the buttocks [color=#C0392B]Captain Craptek[/color] is, [color=#C0392B]Komissar al-Blogunov[/color] wrote:I was out enjoying a day on the lake thinking about which comrade to denounce next when I laid down the keyboard for a moment, just a moment. I was enjoying the scenery when I heard a little commotion, and saw a squirrel in a tutu and sneakers take my keyboard overboard to use as a paddle board.

I knew it was you!
.

**6/8/2015, 11:20 am**

I am a cisgendered domsexual (Unsolicited physically domineering personality) who just needs a hug.

**6/8/2015, 1:01 pm**

Comrades,

I would like to help you all by posting some Transgender names, formally known as gender neutral names.

Taylor, Hillary, Jessie, Dallas, Rory, Ashley, Morgan, Hunter, Logan, Oprah, Lilly, Nancy, Patty, Lennon, Lenin, Stalin, Joseph, River, Iosif Vissarionovich, Vladimir, Putin, etc.

**6/8/2015, 1:10 pm**

Im a lesbian trapped in a mans body! It feels so good to finally say it and come out!

**6/8/2015, 4:05 pm**

I have not yet decided, but I felt I needed to denounce Ivans bragging.

**6/8/2015, 4:08 pm**

Well, someone in my house feels the need to point out my confusion. I went to my sisters bridal shower, stayed long enough to get drunk and then spent the rest of the day target shooting with my son...what does this mean???? Oh, the confusion.

**6/8/2015, 5:20 pm**

.
What are the odds of finding this image of an old 'gentlemen's' magazine online today? They are pretty high... right?!!!
.

**6/8/2015, 6:22 pm**

**6/8/2015, 6:23 pm**

Call me Ishmael.

**6/8/2015, 6:49 pm**

Comrade Putout wrote:.
What are the odds of finding this image of an old 'gentlemen's' magazine online today? They are pretty high... right?!!!
.

pamela-canal.jpg

Thanks so much, dearest Putout! I feel so much better now. (Sigh.)

Actually, I think the Panama Canal was up for grabs around then. Yeah, I think it was. I proceeded to employ the current marketing ploys at the time and made a fortune as Pamela Canal!

Oh and, you'd be most surprised at the images men want to see today. They would just love the one you posted. Trust me. They would. Don't doubt me!

**6/8/2015, 11:59 pm**

I am he and you are me!

**6/9/2015, 1:20 am**

Ugh, Comrade Putout! I used the evil capitalist Google and my eyes! The images! I fear I may require brain bleach or some rusty clam fork therapy for my eyes. For now I will double up on the beet vodka.

**6/9/2015, 9:47 am**

I am declaring myself a brain surgeon. Also a ballerina. And a coloratura soprano and basso buffo. And a plumber and stonemason, as well as a choo-choo driver.

Now anyone who will not hire me for any or all of the above is obviously a transcareerophobic.

**6/9/2015, 4:38 pm**

Henceforth, I shall be known as Sheena, Queen of the Jungle. Please address me thus, as that is the only name, noun, or pronoun I shall answer to.

**6/9/2015, 5:01 pm**

Which picture is of you, Sheena? -- the blonde or the one with the long pretty teeth? And exactly what do you mean by "Queen"? Hmmmmm?

**6/9/2015, 8:31 pm**

OksanaTheTerrible wrote:... I will double up on the beet vodka.

You go right ahead, little Comrade, someone will be along shortly to take advantage of assist you...

**6/9/2015, 8:44 pm**

Great Stalin's Ghost wrote:

Absolutely hilarious! Never saw that one. Thanks for posting.

**6/13/2015, 1:58 pm**

Comrade Pamalinsky! Er Panamalinsky! What a sheltered life you've led! Another clip from the same film:

**6/13/2015, 5:29 pm**

Comrade Kelly,

Please tell me this clip isn't from The Life of Brian, because that's the only film of MP that I remember seeing. And, I don't remember seeing these clips. It was so long ago. One thing I notice while getting older is that I forget the plot details of many films. This enables me to watch them again as if I'd never seen them before. Saves money. And, I get to have fun.

Actually, I like to think of it as “being in present time”, a state most valued in today's society. Or, you could conclude that my memory banks are almost full! Yeah, that's the ticket!

Comrade Putout,

In your illustration of me, you made a reference to a Peter Obdisk. A very obscure reference, indeed. Even when I Googled him I couldn't get a straight answer. PETER OBDISK? Are you serious? (How did you find out?)

The People's Cube - Political Satire

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