The People's Cube - Political Satire

Washington DC -- Get ready for a complete redrawing of the states of the United States of America. Gone will be the old familiar state lines. These will be replaced with the new States of America.

President Obama today stated that the old regional separation of states has no real meaning in today's world. "We as a people have evolved beyond the artificial boundaries of old norms," he said. "Today, more and more, the American people identify with states our forefathers never could have conceived. The LGBT people's identify and belong to that state of community, the immigrants of our nation belong to the state of that particular community. Minorities belong to their respective communities. The old states of the Union have lost all meaning. The new states are real and they are not served by the old norms of representation in our society."

"They are the real states of our Union. Each one of these states has its own needs, issues, and right to be a part of the governing process of this nation," President Obama said. "It is time to redraw the map of the United States of America. the old states have very little meaning anymore except as an anachronism of a world long gone by," stated the President.

"I want each and every one of you to help me to work to transform the nation by recognizing the new states of the Union for what they are: the actual states today. I want you to help me to redraw the map of America. I want you to help me to achieve real representational politics in our national government. It is a long time coming,"

I propose this as the new States of America map:

How about State of Depression, State of Fear, State of Apoplexy, State of Nausea, State of Redistribution, State of Revulsion, State of Confusion, State of Self Loathing.... just to name a few......

trashmouth wrote:How about State of Depression, State of Fear, State of Apoplexy, State of Nausea, State of Redistribution, State of Revulsion, State of Confusion.... just to name a few......

State of Hypnosis, State of Kollephorneeya, State of Sedation...

State of Acute Delirium near the Potomac River

Looks like you boys got a pretty good handle on this Unification. What could be better than a society with overpriced forced free healthcare, LGBTXQVZ units redefining our value system, and Empress Hillary deciding our futures for the next decade? I'M just happy to confirm my intense lesbian status and hope one day they let me in the female locker room at my health club . . . oh the pain I have endured.

Comrades:

The Peoples Cube is six-sided, at least until it is reviewed by the Supreme Arbiters of Truth and Social Justice. In the meantime, the proletariat suggests that Amerika must reflect cubist values, and thus have six states. The current proposal is that the northeast, from Philadelphia through Baltimore and up through Maine, shall be the state of New Karl Marks. The western coast shall be divided at the fortieth parallel into the states of Chavez-Huerta {south of the parallel} and Chairman Mao {north of the parallel}. What was once the Florida peninsula shall be New Cuba, and Miami shall be renamed Castro. The District of Columbia shall become Cube Central. All remaining area will form New Siberia, home of the bitter clingers. Da or Nyet Comrades?

All I know is that nobody that claims that they're something other than what they were born as is getting citizenship in my half-acre state.

They could be named after the levels of hell. If we only have 9 states, the Obamacare exchanges might be less bankrupt!

OksanaTheTerrible wrote:They could be named after the levels of hell. If we only have 9 states, the Obamacare exchanges might be less bankrupt!

Comrade Oksana, His Excellency's exchanges are NOT bankrupt. The Supreme Soviet has ruled that they are not.

The problem with His Excellency's exchanges is obvious. The Evil ReThugLiKKKans and their relentless assault on His Most Serene Excellency's most compassionate and most fiscally burdensome healthcare program.

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HAIL OBAMA!!!

OksanaTheTerrible wrote:They could be named after the levels of hell. If we only have 9 states, the Obamacare exchanges might be less bankrupt!

Oksana,

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