The People's Cube - Political Satire

Comrades, I have some breaking news that will surely be a disappointment to many of you. In a stunning development, Diebold accidentally released the results of the upcoming election. Needless to say, the shadow government puppet masters are not pleased.


<a href="https://www.theonion.com/content/node/7 ... o">Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 2008 Election Early</a>

Staged assassination hmmmm? I wonder who the shadow government will choose. Or are we the shadow government? I forget. If we are, then I hope the winner is decided by gladiatorial death match.

My thoughts exactly! But he may have just been teasing us!

What? Diebold still decides elections? Then how did the Party score such a massive victory (and MANDATE) in the 2006 Revolution?

I just hope we get a split Democratic convention and have Our Beloved Empress, Hillary and Sultan Obama fight for the delegates! Ah, the smell of tear gas and the sounds of riots and catfighting between Hillary and the Sultan's wife at the convention!

Komrade Zarkof, that would only bring new meaning to the term, "Death By Chocolate"

It is clear, the shadow government puppet masters wish to destroy the rethuglican party while at the same time initiating the United Socialist States of America, thus McCain was declared the victor.

Funny story, our Progressive Democrat Neighbor (to protect his identity, we'll call him Comrade Paul) was at the polling booth the same time as my wife on election night in 2006. Mrs. Parasite overheard Comrade Paul lament that the "ballots were confusing." Ha, I told Mrs. Parasite, the Liberal fax machines were whirring up a storm the night before, obviously. Little did he know, to fear not! The cause won out and such tactics were as pointless as Trotsky's helmet.

It is troubling still that this story leaked out. It could depress the vote even more that the MSM announcement of non-person G;s victory over Bushitler in Florida, Sure, the puppet masters have chosen the next president already, but we still want it to appear that it was a fair selection of the president.

We must by all means plant the idea of the Right-Wing puppet masters planning everything for the masses! We must drive that point at every opportunity until we can no longer talk, until we puke, or until the masses get absolutely desentisized to the idea (whichever comes first).

And once the masses get desentisized to the idea that their so-called democracy is a mockery and begin to believe that they are indeed helpless and voiceless under the thumb of totalitarian overlords, it is only a one-step operation for us to move in and become the real overlords. If they have become indifferent to democracy they will not defend it. As overlords we will come off more caring and benevolent that the fictional ones which we had put in those stupid proletarian heads of theirs. THe proles will be happy. The few that will riot will be quickly eliminated along with the witnesses even before the rumor of rioting reaches unauthorized ears. We'll do it for the children.

I think the plan of the Puppet masters is perfect! By choosing the Socialist-lite candidate McCain, they will have destroyed the rethuglican party forever. But as the leak revealed, they may already have a staged assassination in mind, which no doubt will be used to put one of our own in power.