The People's Cube - Political Satire

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As we know, in a revolutionary push for true democracy, a petition was initiated to smash the fraud perpetrated by Riggin' Trumpster and bring Her Highness back to the Oval Office, as it was She who WON THE POPULAR VOTE !

To this minute, uncountable trillions of intellectually nuanced Americans already signed that document - a true banner of democracy, which pales the yellowed racist Declarations of This-or-That. Baseball bats, iron bars, etc. were used to sign - such is the yearning of the masses!

A stunning piece of blitz-research* reveals that there is much, much more than just THE (nationwide, summa summarum) POPULAR VOTE majority to support Empress' righteous demand!

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Some of the cardinal disclosures are presented below (with numerics ripped out, to not obscure and/or bore).

Wyoming : That state has two diagonals (see map). Take the longer one, in miles (Dm). With E for Empress and T for Trump, let vE resp. vT denote the correct resp. the incorrect popular vote for E resp. T. Now, multiply vE by Dm (vE×Dm) and simultaneously divide vT by Dm (vT/Dm). With that correction, Wyoming - both popular and electoral vote - goes clearly to Empress!

Oklahoma : Here, take the rank of that state in an alphabetically ordered list of US states (N=36). Now calculate vE raised to N (vE^N), and compare it to the N-th root of vT (√vT). Bingo! Empress clearly won!

Alaska : Take the radius of the smallest circle enclosing that state, in inches (Ri). With that gigantic number in hand, go to your favorite Differential Calculus Suite ... once here, you perform your progressive computations, et voilà! Empress on top!

Generic : Just recall the glory of the Exp/Log concept!
As you know from school, Exp - for exponential - heavily expands things, while Log - for logarithm - radically contracts everything. For instance - ATTENTION, Comrades of gender M! - if your peter appears a bit tiny, use Exp(peter)!, and vice versa - if your peter is a Peter, and you're sick & tired of that social injustice, then just Log(Peter)!
And back to Empress/Trump votes vE/vT : just Exp(vE) and Log(vT), done!

And so on . . .
Just state by state . . .
Can there be any doubt who won the election ???


* study funded by MoveOn and Comrade Podesta's CAP.

The first stage of Democrat party grief: denial.

The second stage of Democrat party grief: shoot self in foot.

The third stage of Democrat grief: demand everyone shoot self in foot.

The forth stage of democrat party grief: blame self inflicted wounds on Republicans.

The fifth stage of democrat party grief: parley those lies into a springboard for the next election.

The sixth stage of democrat party grief: destroy the country as much as possible before losing the next election.

Fhalkyn wrote:You forget the seventh, ongoing stage, Comrade Halliburton: continue to tighten the stranglehold on education and indoctrinate the children! Who cares if liberals have the highest abortion rates? They don't need children. They'll just indoctrinate yours.

That comes under the third stage of democrat party grief.

$.$. Halliburton wrote:

Fhalkyn wrote:You forget the seventh, ongoing stage, Comrade Halliburton: continue to tighten the stranglehold on education and indoctrinate the children! ...

That comes under the third stage of democrat party grief.

yet, indeed, I also thought of "seventh stage", the seventh stage - possibly missing.

The seventh stage of Democrat party revolutionary consciousness (after been kicked away from power by losing election) would be:

Community-organize-yourself back to power
& Go back to stage one & Proceed through all stages again
& Do that recursively until the Glorious Day (also known as Next Tuesday)
when you finally can sigh with relief: O, Marx - thy work is done! Finis coronat opus!

Comrades,

Has anyone read - and actually understood - the 12th Amendment to the Constitution? (if you answered yes, take this free pass - you're entitled to immediate psychiatric attention at the nearest Jiffy Lobo clinic) I tried reading it and woke up the next morning in Comrade Putout's linen closet under the rubber sheets. You say, "Then, amend the 12th." No, comrades - the 12th is un-amendable because it's un-readable. It's time to repeal it. And while we're at it, let's save time and repeal the whole Constitution, The Bill of Rights, and all that old, dead, white guy stuff. Then, we can get on with the important business of Changing The World. I'm tired of waiting.

Captain Craptek wrote:... the 12th is un-amendable ... time to repeal it ... and repeal the whole Constitution, Bill of Rights, and all that old, dead, white guy stuff. Let's get on with the important business of Changing The World ...

Genosse Dummkopf wrote:... The seventh stage of Democrat party revolutionary consciousness (after been kicked away from power by losing election) would be:

Community-organize-yourself back to power ... & ... & ...

Everyone of a genuine Kubically Progressive Mindset can see, in real-time ― and by Marx, I ain't the first to say this ― the progressively whipped-up BDS, Bush Derangement Syndrome (2003), morphing into comm-org puppeteered THP, Trump Hypermanic Paranoia.

THP is now in acute incubation stage. Full outbreak scheduled on Jan. 20, 2017.

Genosse Dummkopf wrote:

Captain Craptek wrote:... the 12th is un-amendable ... time to repeal it ... and repeal the whole Constitution, Bill of Rights, and all that old, dead, white guy stuff. Let's get on with the important business of Changing The World ...

Genosse Dummkopf wrote:... The seventh stage of Democrat party revolutionary consciousness (after been kicked away from power by losing election) would be:

Community-organize-yourself back to power ... & ... & ...

Everyone of a genuine Kubically Progressive Mindset can see, in real-time ― and by Marx, I ain't the first to say this ― the progressively whipped-up BDS, Bush Derangement Syndrome (2003), morphing into comm-org puppeteered THP, Trump Hypermanic Paranoia.

THP is now in acute incubation stage. Full outbreak scheduled on Jan. 20, 2017.

$.$. Halliburton wrote:

by Lenin's overcomb, gorgeous timing!

(in all dimensions - from electoral, through real-life comic, down to the evermore frenzied cut & doomsdayishly escalating soundtrack, good Ol' Grieg)








UPD (2020-08-12)
YT memoryholed the hilariuos vid.
Yet, it still can be found (3 minutes - surely worth your time, Komrades!)