The People's Cube - Political Satire

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Fellow comrades!

It is true that all time is not created equal.

Unions prioritize the value of laborers based on their seniority, not on their skills. Pensions and retirement are based on time worked, degrees are given based on time studied, people are hired based on years of experience...

This temporal privilege is a gross inequity and serves to prioritize people who have had the privilege of doing something longer than others have. Often this is used as a tool of the capitalist patriarchs who seek to promote a racist white male centered agenda, and oppress temporal minorities who have not had the benefit of temporal privilege.

I SAY ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

Today I say we MUST END TEMPORAL PRIVILEGE AND SMASH THE PATRIARCHY OF THE CLOCK AND CALENDAR!

TODAY, ALL TIME IS EQUAL, AND ALL INTERACTIONS WITH TIME ARE EQUAL.

WE MUST HAVE TEMPORAL EQUITY AT ONCE!

Hurrah! Since now all time is equal I'll get on this immediately next week.

What's that Afghan saying?...

The West has all the watches, we have all the time.

So if we do away with temporal privilege and abolish time, the Ministry of Time gets disbanded, the Commissar of Time becomes unemployed, and the rest of us labor more to meet beet quotas because there's another jobless hungry Colonel to feed...

What could possibly go wrong with that? I'm all for it.

Down with time appropriation and the colonization by our time of other times.

Time Appropriation is real and causes real harm. Time Appropriation is when a dominant time (one with more power simply because the people are alive) selectively takes or incorporates pieces, artifacts, rituals, etc. of another time. Dominant times have the power/resources/ability to take, often for monetary gain or pleasure, without having to fully understand the significance of those temporal elements nor experience the pain and oppression of those times, to such a scale that those in the non-dominant time could never reciprocate.

Time appropriation is oppression.

Every day a totally brand new day now!

Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:So if we do away with temporal privilege and abolish time, the Ministry of Time gets disbanded, the Commissar of Time becomes unemployed, and the rest of us labor more to meet beet quotas because there's another jobless hungry rooster to feed...

What could possibly go wrong with that? I'm all for it.

As with the rest of the progressive agenda, this is not meant to replace the existing reality, but rather to control our perception of this reality.

As such, regulating time and temporal privileges is not really meant to abolish time - it is an instrument to create more regulations and subsequent taxation needed to embrace all aspects of time, including but not limited to "spring breaks," "Kodak moments," "blink of an eye," "bad hair days," "days of rage," "monthlies," and so on.

Far from being disbanded, the Ministry of Time will grow to be the most powerful ministry. It may even outrank the Ministry of Truth, which had a considerable head start, but that advantage can now be easily canceled by fiat, since the Ministry of Time also controls head starts.

Be careful what you say about the Commissar of Time and how you address him. Statute of limitations? It may or may not exist depending on what benefits the Party. In fact, statute of limitations can be reversed and applied retroactively, punishing you for what you will say in the future. Also for what you will think, do, drink, or smoke in the future.

Red Square wrote:As with the rest of the progressive agenda, this is not meant to replace the existing reality, but rather to control our perception of this reality.

So when will the Time Commissar declare that we've achieved the Glorious World of Next Tuesday™?

Imperatorskiy Pingvin wrote:

Red Square wrote:As with the rest of the progressive agenda, this is not meant to replace the existing reality, but rather to control our perception of this reality.

So when will the Time Commissar declare that we've achieved the Glorious World of Next Tuesday™?

Sometime Next Tuesday when I get around to it. It's already happened of course, although we must still look for it, and strive for the idea.

Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:So if we do away with temporal privilege and abolish time, the Ministry of Time gets disbanded, the Commissar of Time becomes unemployed, and the rest of us labor more to meet beet quotas because there's another jobless hungry Colonel to feed...

What could possibly go wrong with that? I'm all for it.

In order to provide temporal equity with those who have spent time in Gulag, your sentence starts last week.

Oh, brother.

What a rabbit hole.

All any of this gobbledygook really means is you crazy commies get to tell everybody else what's right and wrong so you can Rule. Doesn't matter what the gobbledygook is it all boils down to the same thing: I tell you what you do.

The window dressing changes with the seasons. The message is always the same. I Rule over you.

$.$. Halliburton wrote:Oh, brother.



The window dressing changes with the seasons. The message is always the same. I Rule over you.

That sounds vaguely like temporal privilege there. Just because you perceive seasonal changes does not mean everyone does,or that they do it in the same way you do.

Colonel 7.62,

What about this:

Comrade Squirrel! You've located the People's long-lost 8-track? I'm almost impressed.

[color=#C0392B]Ivan the Stakhanovets[/color] should really be impressed now that he wrote:Comrade Squirrel! You've located the People's long-lost 8-track? I'm almost impressed.

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Does this bring back memories, Ivan... if that is your real name!!
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For sale on eBay...
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(...and a bootleg to boot!)
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Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:Then have we abolished such offensively chronocentric terms like yesterday, today, and tomorrow?

Perhaps, Comrade. But we have NOT abolished The Day After Tomorrow.

Because that's the day that the Global Warming will come and kill us all, you know.

We must always be afraid mindful of The Day After Tomorrow. And all of the other propaganda consciousness-raising movies that keep us too afraid to ever produce anything.

What about always being mindful of Next Tuesday?

We must do with verb tenses what we have done with pronouns: let everycreature choose xir own verb tenses regardless of assigned temporal references. This is-was-will be fun. Even more fun [has been-is to be] punishing-ed creatures who use-using-used cistenses.

My head hurts. Or will hurt. Or did hurt.

Mikhail Lysenkomann wrote:

Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:Then have we abolished such offensively chronocentric terms like yesterday, today, and tomorrow?

Perhaps, Comrade. But we have NOT abolished The Day After Tomorrow.

Because that's the day that the Global Warming will come and kill us all, you know.

We must always be afraid mindful of The Day After Tomorrow. And all of the other propaganda consciousness-raising movies that keep us too afraid to ever produce anything.

This man was fifty years ahead of all of us:

It's Just A Matter Of Time

Mikhail Lysenkomann wrote:This man was fifty years ahead of all of us:

It's Just A Matter Of Time

Good stuff, Maynard.

If we abolish yesterday, will our troubles seem so far away?

deepcrimsom wrote:If we abolish yesterday, will our troubles seem so far away?