Comrades! This brief instructional video will put you on the cutting edge in the gun debate. No more will you need to fear facts and logic because now they're on your side! Master the basics of this video, and even lifetime members of the NRA will be silly putty in your hands.
Also, please help a comrade by posting your informed user comments explaining how...
this video is amazingly factually accurate and logically irrefutable
that you're a gun owner whose mind was changed by this video
that guns are extremely dangerous to our democracy
And without further ado...
4/7/2018, 1:48 am
The People's Anthony Sullivan
OK...
I can't tell if that was sarcastic satire or he's being really stupid. I am an optimist and am willing to lean towards "satire"
To that end, why is he not here at the Cube, mocking extolling mindless bozos geniuses of my generation??
If he is serious, what in the world is he even trying to get at??
4/7/2018, 10:21 am
Komissar al-Blogunov
I'm pretty sure it's satire, but serious anti-gunners make it so hard to tell these days. In any case, I agree this guy does have potential as Cube material.
4/7/2018, 11:30 am
Captain Craptek
Friends,
Did I just watch that guy murder an innocent Sciurus carolinensis nest support structure? Well,.. I did! I did! What a piece of crap garbage. I'll be tweeting and hashtagging and,.. whatever, till he's in prison and hanging from the fore-lower-topsail-yardarm! Arrr!
Captain Outraged
4/7/2018, 12:12 pm
Comrade Putout
.
If I see this guy with an assault musket in the forest...
I am running the hell out of there!! .
.
...or is he just his doppelgänger? .
4/7/2018, 12:41 pm
Papa Kalashnikook
I've never understood the concept of "gun control" at least for homicidal maniacs. Is that like a "Gun Free Zone"? You know, those areas where all the mass shootings seem to occur? CAN'T PEOPLE READ THE SIGNS??
4/7/2018, 2:14 pm
Komissar al-Blogunov
Comrade Putout wrote:.
If I see this guy with an assault musket in the forest...
I am running the hell out of there!! .
.
...or is he just his doppelgänger? .
The resemblance is uncanny! Have we seen this guy on the Cube before?
4/7/2018, 3:27 pm
Comrade Putout
The sly and most likely Sistema instructor [color=#C0392B]Komissar al-Blogunov[/color] wrote:The resemblance is uncanny! Have we seen this guy on the Cube before?
.
No... never! (I need a new plastic lunch box... can you hook me up?) .
.
4/7/2018, 5:19 pm
Comrade Putout
.
Thank you for your service, Komissar al-Blogunov! .
.
You know you want yourself... .
4/7/2018, 6:30 pm
Komissar al-Blogunov
Comrade Putout wrote:.
Thank you for your service, Komissar al-Blogunov! .
.
You know you want yourself... .
Well, looks like the game's up. I am Komissar al-Blogunov.
4/7/2018, 7:21 pm
Captain Craptek
Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:
Comrade Putout wrote:.
Thank you for your service, Komissar al-Blogunov! .
Well, looks like the game's up. I am Komissar al-Blogunov.
We know that, Comrade. But, was it really necessary to kill that squirrel nest support structure just to make your point? Shame.
4/7/2018, 9:31 pm
Komissar al-Blogunov
Captain Craptek wrote:
Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:
Comrade Putout wrote:.
Thank you for your service, Komissar al-Blogunov! .
Well, looks like the game's up. I am Komissar al-Blogunov.
We know that, Comrade. But, was it really necessary to kill that squirrel nest support structure just to make your point? Shame.
It was the gun. As the saying goes, "People don't cut down trees, armor piercing rounds fired from AR-15s cut down trees." On the bright side, it did provide housing for low income squirrels that can't afford high rise nesting.
4/9/2018, 2:13 pm
Comrade Whoopie
Comrades, those who hammer their Kalashnikovs into plowshares, will plow the fields for those who didn't.
4/9/2018, 3:20 pm
Chief Designer
The People's Anthony Sullivan wrote:OK...
I can't tell if that was sarcastic satire or he's being really stupid. I am an optimist and am willing to lean towards "satire"
To that end, why is he not here at the Cube, mocking extolling mindless bozos geniuses of my generation??
If he is serious, what in the world is he even trying to get at??
If your question is serious, then it's an illustration of Poe's Law in action.
This was brilliantly done, hitting all the notes of the standard anti-gun argument, but it a way that shows the straw-man nature of all of them while having me ROTFL.
Because without them you have to do it this way...(P/k [probability of kill] drops drastically, but the entertainment value goes way up. It's not easy to explain to hungry Children™ why there's no meat; but damn, wasn't that a laugh?)
4/9/2018, 9:19 pm
Captain Craptek
Comrade Ivan,
The Youtube narrator's last words are: "...they just don't learn." Well, I submit that it's the narrator who never learns - we keep coming back cause it's fun! And it's free, too!
CC
4/9/2018, 10:08 pm
Red Square
Captain Craptek wrote:And it's free, too!
Famous last words.
4/10/2018, 1:06 am
Chief Designer
Captain Craptek wrote:
...And it's free, too!
Remember, if you're not paying for it, you're not the customer; you're the commodity being sold.
- SK
4/11/2018, 2:56 am
Chief Designer
Comrade Putout wrote:.
...or is he just his doppelgänger? .
Wait, isn't that "Sergei, the Russian Colluder guy?"
- SK
4/11/2018, 10:56 am
Komissar al-Blogunov
Chief Designer wrote:
Comrade Putout wrote:.
...or is he just his doppelgänger? .
Wait, isn't that "Sergei, the Russian Colluder guy?"
- SK
Close relative.
4/12/2018, 1:36 pm
Captain Craptek
Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:Why should guns be controlled?
Because without them you have to do it this way...(P/k [probability of kill] drops drastically, but the entertainment value goes way up. It's not easy to explain to hungry Children™ why there's no meat; but damn, wasn't that a laugh?)
Ivan,
The People's Rodenttm never leaves home without one!
CC
4/12/2018, 3:14 pm
Ivan the Stakhanovets
As a former competitive skeet-shooter, I can only picture being on the bank with my over/under (with a compass in the stock and this thing that tells time) calling "PULL" and leading the target just right...
good fun.
4/14/2018, 3:14 pm
Pamalinsky
Comrade Whoopie wrote:Comrades, those who hammer their Kalashnikovs into plowshares, will plow the fields for those who didn't.
Umm, errr...CRAZY AWESOME!
4/23/2018, 6:28 pm
Apparatchik Unkulturny
My Our Entire Beet Collectiv has been terrified! because of the very dangerous weapons that are displayed in this thread! We all gathered in the basement of thePeoples' Beet-Warehouse to escape the danger!
But after a cautionaryextremely-informative call from the State Bureau Of Beet And Hoe-Handle Production, I ordered we all decided that the Beet Field Workers will resume their customary duties immediately (if they know what is good for them - and their families...)
4/23/2018, 9:50 pm
Komissar al-Blogunov
It took all I had to actually handle a real assault gun (I washed my hands with bleach afterwards), but that squirrel catapult has me double checking the locks on my modest dacha every night. That takes a while with 700 rooms with two outside windows apiece.
Well, yeah, but slavery was legal when the Second Amendment was ratified and signed into law by Hitler.
4/25/2018, 10:16 pm
Captain Craptek
Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:
Red Square wrote:
Well, yeah, but slavery was legal when the Second Amendment was ratified and signed into law by Hitler.
I didn't know Bush signed the Second Amendment...
4/25/2018, 10:40 pm
Komissar al-Blogunov
Captain Craptek wrote:
Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:
Red Square wrote:
Well, yeah, but slavery was legal when the Second Amendment was ratified and signed into law by Hitler.
I didn't know Bush signed the Second Amendment...
Saw it on History Channel.
4/26/2018, 8:00 pm
Ivan the Stakhanovets
Bush broke three crayons before he finished his signature. It was on the internet, it has to be true.
4/27/2018, 10:28 am
Komissar al-Blogunov
Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:Bush broke three crayons before he finished his signature. It was on the internet, it has to be true.
Just imagine what a reporter with a panel of concerned looking psychologists could do with GWB's broken crayons. They could speculate about repressed anger, what may be causing it, and how it compromises his ability to govern. Too bad we missed it.
But maybe we could invent report a similar incident with Tr*mp.
4/27/2018, 10:39 am
Ivan the Stakhanovets
Excellent point, Comrade.
By Lenin, imagine what the People's Biologists could do with the DNA in the saliva still on the crayons!
4/27/2018, 10:43 am
RedDiaperette
But what colors were the crayons? We may have a hate crime here.
4/27/2018, 5:10 pm
Komissar al-Blogunov
RedDiaperette wrote:But what colors were the crayons? We may have a hate crime here.
Whoa! I'll bet not one of them was white! Clearly, conservatives are opposed to crayons of color.
5/16/2018, 1:58 pm
Red Square
Captain Craptek wrote:The People's Rodenttm never leaves home without one!
CC
These greedy humans just never stop oppressing the starving masses!
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">my mom put oil on her bird feeder to keep squirrels from stealing the bird food and <a href="https://t.co/TkrmOR4KlH">pic.twitter.co ... </p>— christina rotondo (@christinaroto) <a href=" 4, 2018</a></blockquote>
<script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>
8/9/2019, 11:11 am
Red Square
Ideas are far more powerful than guns. We don't allow our enemies to have guns, why should we allow them to have ideas?
8/24/2019, 12:19 pm
Red Square
I just realized that you can't spell Comrade Blogunov without "gun." That's a serious dog whistle that calls for the Party's special attention.
In other news...
When conservative gun store commercials are funnier than liberal late night comedy, we know who the winning side in the culture wars is.
8/24/2019, 10:28 pm
Comrade Stierlitz
Red Square wrote:I just realized that you can't spell Comrade Blogunov without "gun." That's a serious dog whistle that calls for the Party's special attention.
In other news...
When conservative gun store commercials are funnier than liberal late night comedy, we know who the winning side in the culture wars is.
