2/12/2019, 2:11 am
MINNEAPOLIS, MN--Senator Amy Klobuchar (D-MN) was mighty frosty by the end of her speech on Sunday in which she announced her intention to seek the presidency in 2020. An unexpected snow fell heavily onto the scene as she pledged to fight against Global Warming. But was this merely a natural coincidence? A closer look at one photo from the event reveals that there may have been more to it. A drunken Indian squaw can be seen in the background performing some sort of ceremonial dance. The photo was shared with Native American activist and Vietnam Veteran Nathan Phillips, who told our reporters that the pale squaw appeared to be doing an old Indian Snow Dance, which is akin to the more widely known Rain Dance.
The dancer brandished two bottles of Michelob Ultra, the preferred brand of firewater by the self-proclaimed Native American Senator Elizabeth Warren (D-MA), who also announced her intention to seek the presidency just one day earlier. Upon closer inspection of the photo by experts, the identity of the dancer was confirmed to be that of the Senator from Massachusetts. We reached out to Senator Warren for comment, who denied that she was using her high cheek bones to interfere in Senator Klobuchar's announcement. She claimed she was simply doing her part to combat climate change, just as her Papaw used to do and just as her people have always done.
