The People's Cube - Political Satire

As collectives all around our Planet heroically & 24/7 fight the global enemy CoV-2, the evolution of mankind personkind clearly approaches its long-hoped-for endpoint. Amazingly, neither our planetary virforce of experts, nor even its Central Committee, the UN/WHO, do see it coming.

Well, Komrades, once again Our Glorious Organ has - exclusively - the goods!
Here the details.

The crux is the unrelenting, personkind-wide Corona-induced duty of 24/7 respirative self-condomization, by now mandatorily engraved into our collective groupthink. (Rumor has it, a few subversive elements are "skeptical" even of the at-least-12/7 facial condomizing. Needless to say, those few will be artfully persuaded by skilled personnel. Kolyma? Umiat?)

And here comes the trick. Homo sapiens exhales carbon, right? That notorious CO2, ja? Now, virus-tightly self-condomized, what does she/it/he inhale, ah? . . . Korrekt, Komrade! Karbon, her/zir/his self-exhaled CO2.

This way, three goals are hit. First: Within one or two generations, planetary Homo sapiens evolves into Homo autocarbonensis! No more sapiens sapiens, but carbonium ex carbonium in. Second: Carbon finally caught in closed loop. No more Climate Emergency! Klimkatastrophia goodbye. Third: Planet forever clean. Dekarbonized. Sustainable. End of Evolution.

Moral:
Respiratorial self-condomization of our planetary kollektive - a way to evolutionize the Revolution, in order to revolutionize the Evolution!




~

From the Did You Know? Faculty:

Most recently, Dr. Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus of UN/WHO agreed to change his name to Tedros Tedros Ghebreyuhammad. That move, once upon a time initiated by the (former) UN/GenSec Boutros Boutros-Ghali (his suggestion: Tedros Tedros Ghebreyesus), was shortly thereafter radically amplified and strongly demanded by UN's Shura Headsmen of Islamic Transformation (UN/SHIT)¹ as well as relentlessly clamored for by UN's People Of Oriental Peace (UN/POOP)². (It was, of course, that '..yesus' which made SHIT & POOP go ape.)


¹ UN/SHIT : A well-known yuuge majority of UN member states plus a Honorary Mufti, Herr Heusgen (ze kurrent UN-Ambassador of ze Germanistan, and well-deserved Nr. 7 on Simon Wiesenthal Center's Top Ten Worst Anti-Semitic Incidents 2019)

² UN/POOP : An amorphous (likely majority?) of UN apparatchiks and related UN bureaucrats fiercely conforming with SHIT, or duplicitously sympathizing with the aforementioned, or coldly calculating to better be in tank for SHIT, in case Muhammadistan unrolls planetarily. (Needless to say, POOP includes all members of SHIT.)

How the mythical horned rodent has missed some GD.

The local People's Emporium Shelves have had a vacant spot where Genosse Dummkopf used to be fully stocked and loaded.

The JOY to see a full supply chain of Dummkopf all pre-packaged and ready for mass consumption.

Closed Loops is eggsaktly the kind of climate models needed to see the end of CoVid Pandemic.

Closed Loop Breathing is the future of WHOSHITUN.

Only logical linear socialengineert'werk* choice we have as you so clearly and expertly explained.

WHOSHITUN is Closed Loop Breathing Facility.

forelock tug from 'pelipsky traveling west from Texazistan to outflank you from the Russian Front in your backyard. The Great Continental Divide will be breached by end of week, as long as 'pelipsky can escape Denver before 8:00 p.m. curfew lock down.

____________________

*Use your Right t'werk or lose it! (Ask Clara...but get signed and stamped permission slips from two supervisory adults before gettin' in line.)

(transmission from Space)

Among the self-condomization-"skeptic" bunch of kulaks, the SpaceX Dragon Boys Doug and Bob! Such respirative-karbon-recirculation denialists, those two (... or have you, Komrade, ever seen them wearing a WHO-prescribed mask?). So it's only korrekt to have them shot into outer space.

There, they can "socialize" - kissy-kissy, huggy-huggy, and all that bourgeois stuff - as much as they wish, those detractors...

Alas, SpaceX should have packed that dude Flynn into the rocket, to make it a nice troika. Flynn, who was uncountably many times caught unmasked, already in the days of Hopey Changey!

BTW, Comrade Bergoglio, our agent installed in the Holy See, of course also spreads - no surprise, heh heh - the Spirit of Coronal Transformation.

It is indeed wonderful to see how effete bourgeois cultures are adopting the practices of enlightened Koranic peoples, to wit: requiring the covering of the face when leaving the home, being permitted outside the home only by authorization of a guardian (i.e., the State), keeping distance from others to avoid sinful touching, and reporting the sins of others to the Committee on the Keeping of Virtue.

One eagerly awaits the public floggings -- or, perhaps, stonings, in order to keep the six-foot distances. I will gladly provide popcorn machines for the events.

Genosse Dummkopf wrote:(transmission from Space)

Among the self-condomization-"skeptic" bunch of kulaks, the SpaceX Dragon Boys Doug and Bob! Such respirative-karbon-recirculation denialists, those two (... or have you, Komrade, ever seen them wearing a WHO-prescribed mask?). So it's only korrekt to have them shot into outer space.

There, they can "socialize" - kissy-kissy, huggy-huggy, and all that bourgeois stuff - as much as they wish, those detractors...

Alas, SpaceX should have packed that dude Flynn into the rocket, to make it a nice troika. Flynn, who was uncountably many times caught unmasked, already in the days of Hopey Changey!

"Doug and Bob"?

Take off, eh!

What kind of hosers would put "Doug and Bob" in space!!

prog off; Seriously, though, it sounds like the perfect plot-line for "Strange Brew II" eh? "Strange Brew: Lost in SpaceX!"

RedDiaperette wrote:... I will gladly provide popcorn machines for the events ...

Glory ^(squared) !

CoV-2 mutates!

Today, here in our Trofim Lysenko Institute for Ultimate Deep Insight, we had a particularly well-grown CoV-2 exemplar under the microscope. Waving its peplomers - those external red pimples (aka glycoprotein spikes) of zir/her/his - he telegraphed, in flawless Morse code, the following:

I, CoV-2, ID-3141592653589793, have the ambition to mutate into Gretacovi Floydberg. Thusly mutated, GretFloy will subtract Covid-19 from equaprog fighters, and concomitantly beef up their revolutionary furor. Plusss - he added, drooling slightly - my GretFloy mutation complete, I will - fuckie, fuckie - reproduce like mad!