The People's Cube - Political Satire

Glorious news Comrades!

Horrible detail revealed about Brittney Griner release

Viktor "The Merchant of Death" Bout (Citizen of the Motherland) has suffered under the oppressive US prison system for too long, and has been successfully traded for Brittney Griner, a WNBA Ambassador of Goodwill, Wakandan Values, and Hashish Oil.  She will return to her LGBTQ+++.... lifestyle and maybe shoot some hoops. 

Viktor will return to Russia where he can return to his proprietorship of a small shop that exports assault rifles  camping and hunting supplies to dictators and despots sportsmen worldwide.

Russian corrections officers are sick and damn-tired of listening to Griner assert her "Superstar" status in an activity that nobody watches, and whine and complain about not being paid like an NBA Player.   Her nine-year sentence has been waived. 

Premier Cho Bai-Din immediately took credit for freeing Mz. Griner, and at the same time received criticism for not obtaining release of another American political prisoner still held by the Russians, Paul Whelan, a former United States Marine.  Bai-Din immediately responded "Listen, Jack--Marines are expendable, and they know it."

So much for "social justice."

Stolen Appropriated Collectivised quote:

She's (sic) sacrificing the celebrity status of a trendy political prisoner for the obscurity of the WNBA.

<off>
I'm anxious to see her take a knee at the sound of the National Anthem. Of course as an anti-USA/capitalist WNBA star (who deserves more money), she'll reject getting an I-phone, or going to McDonalds with her "wife" or any of those other "rights" that Americans deny to blacks, lesbians, or professional athletes.

If she thinks America is such a horrible place, why isn't she seeking asylum in Havana, or Caracas, or Pyongyang? We don't want to listen to her whining anymore than her Russian guards did, why is she coming here?

 

After considerable reflection, I have come to realize that my perception is too "mainstream" and not enough "Cube." I therefore respectfully submit the following REVISED headline...





Viktor "The Merchant of Death" Bout offended that he is only worth one drugged up WNBA lesbian in trade value... "I KNOW what I'm worth" stated Viktor, hastily interviewed while he was mailing his resume and a catalog to an address in PyongYang

Whalen has a note, too, but different from Griner.

Bout (pronounced as Boot in Russian - for realz) is worth a lot more to Putin than one anthem-kneeler. He could've been traded for all of the Americans in Russian prisons, plus a couple of Russia's own political prisoners, like Alexey Navalny and Ilya Yashin. The latter was convicted today to 8.5 years of prison time for describing what the entire world already knows about Russian military's atrocities in Bucha, Ukraine. In Putin's Russia, atrocities commit you.

https://thepeoplescube.com/peoples-kara ... 23354.html

‘pelipsky’s contribution to this surreal deep state of affairs thread. Woo woo, comrades.

Forelock tug.

Colonel Obyezyana wrote: ↑

12/9/2022, 7:55 pm

Whalen has a note, too, but different from Griner.

I'm sure this man is worth at least three Britneys plus one Victor.