The People's Cube - Political Satire

Today the state-run AP published a story "White House uses Web against Drudge attack." The original title was "White House attacks Drudge for using Web," but loyalty to the Hope&Change™ brand prevailed.

The article links to a White House blog post in which Linda Douglass, the disinformation director for the White House's Health Reform Office, debunks all gloomy predictions by repeating Obama's sunny promises.

She shows a video of Obama at the AARP meeting saying, "Here's a guarantee that I've made: If you have insurance that you like, then you'll be able to keep that insurance." Which is like saying, "If I pee in the pool in which you are swimming, I guarantee that the water around you will not be affected." See illustration below.

Linda Douglass explained to the masses that Obama's opponents are simply "People with a computer and a lot of free time."

Which means that these people's minds are not at work while they are arguing Obama's reform - they are just automatically doing what anyone would do given access to a computer and too much free time. It also means that Obama would have less opposition, if the government limited access to computers and the peasants spent more time digging beets for the common good instead of using the Web.

This also highlights the problem the country faces with its pensioners, who have way too much free time on their hands. And this is why we need this healthcare reform - to drastically reduce the number of scoundrels whose idle hands are a menace to our glorious progress towards the brighter future.

Comrades, we have not learned the lessons of history (boy, what a surprise THAT is.) The glorious USSR did not endure because its leadership failed to control the evil demon of the 1980s, the VCR. Today, another electronic nuisance threatens utopia; the Internet!

Red Square is right, if these terrorists were occupied trying to grow a subsistence-level of food on the collective farm, they would not have the time to cause trouble by doing things our leaders view as useless, such as reading bills and thinking. World Wide Web, indeed! World Wide Wastrels is more like it.

Red State: <a href="https://tinyurl.com/n8n52g">Call For Informants: If You Oppose Obamacare, Even in ‘Casual Conversation,' the White House Wants to Know About It </a><P>Moonbats with too much time on their hands must be turned in. My own mother has been blogging against Obamacare with her bingo pals. I will turn her in for the reward: Cash for Slackers.

I should have written Wingnuts- me, not Moonbats- them.

Don't let Ivana Tinkle near the pool.

Wouldn't their youth be restored if they walk into the One's pee? We all know it has magical properties.

On a part of the subject though, us sitting here, typing on our computers and NOT helping on the community farm. . . aren't we hurting the Party and the community at large?

Ivana Tinkle wrote:Red State: <a href="https://tinyurl.com/n8n52g">Call For Informants: If You Oppose Obamacare, Even in ‘Casual Conversation,' the White House Wants to Know About It </a><P>Moonbats with too much time on their hands must be turned in. My own mother has been blogging against Obamacare with her bingo pals. I will turn her in for the reward: Cash for Slackers.

We can all do the "I am Spartacus" thing and flood their mailboxes with short denunciations of thoughtcriminals. Or just start sending them links to the People's Cube stories, including Cash for Clunkers, and help increase the traffic.

Commissar_Elliott wrote:Wouldn't their youth be restored if they walk into the One's pee? We all know it has magical properties.

Of course this would be true, my fellow Minnesotlian - in fact, I think the One's urinary effluvia is the chief ingredient in Wealth Spread and other fantastic products. Why, I'm quite sure that there is a whole line of products made from the detritus that falls from his body; hair follicles, dead skin, saliva, sweat, urine, feces, hair grease, snot, tears (though these are hard to come by) all these relics are essence of O and, if they have not already been, could be employed in creating a line of products to rival Estee Lauder; a government line of products - a required line of products. Yes, I see it all now. First we establish the line of cosmetic/condiment products made from the excretions of the One; Second, we levy huge taxes on all other cosmetic/condiment lines and drive them out of business; Third, we impose requirements on the foolish American public that they must, under penalty of fines, use the Obama line of cosmetic/condiments, and then... we rule the world!!!!! MUHAHAHAHA.

Commissar_Elliott wrote:On a part of the subject though, us sitting here, typing on our computers and NOT helping on the community farm. . . aren't we hurting the Party and the community at large?

How dare you, sir?! Why, we who sit all day at our computers banging away at the keyboards form a vital, no the most vital link in establishing the world of next Tuesday. Why, w/o our superior planning ability, our remarkable collective insight, and our inattentiveness to things in our immediate surroundings nothing would ever get done in immanentizing the eschaton and accomplishing the overthrow of the bourgeoisie. Next time, sir, that you have an idea such as this might I suggest dunking your head first into a vat of Lienenkugel's (Summer Ale if possible)?

Ivana Tinkle wrote:Red State: <a href="https://tinyurl.com/n8n52g">Call For Informants: If You Oppose Obamacare, Even in ‘Casual Conversation,' the White House Wants to Know About It </a><P>Moonbats with too much time on their hands must be turned in. My own mother has been blogging against Obamacare with her bingo pals. I will turn her in for the reward: Cash for Slackers.

This is truly scary. So cheerful, so welcoming, so conciliatory that my spidey-sense is immediately on fire.

The direct link to the White House website is here; and the video of Linda Douglass is frightening.

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="https://www.youtube.com/v/U0XCl6OHgiM&c ... ram><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"></param><embed src="https://www.youtube.com/v/U0XCl6OHgiM&c ... edded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

By Lenin, she looks like the wicked witch of the west or like the White Queen out of Narnia. Does she have any eyelids? I can't tell.

AbecedariusRex wrote:

Commissar_Elliott wrote:Wouldn't their youth be restored if they walk into the One's pee? We all know it has magical properties.

Of course this would be true, my fellow Minnesotlian - in fact, I think the One's urinary effluvia is the chief ingredient in Wealth Spread and other fantastic products. Why, I'm quite sure that there is a whole line of products made from the detritus that falls from his body; hair follicles, dead skin, saliva, sweat, urine, feces, hair grease, snot, tears (though these are hard to come by) all these relics are essence of O and, if they have not already been, could be employed in creating a line of products to rival Estee Lauder; a government line of products - a required line of products. Yes, I see it all now. First we establish the line of cosmetic/condiment products made from the excretions of the One; Second, we levy huge taxes on all other cosmetic/condiment lines and drive them out of business; Third, we impose requirements on the foolish American public that they must, under penalty of fines, use the Obama line of cosmetic/condiments, and then... we rule the world!!!!! MUHAHAHAHA.

(off)
I can help get feel sick at the idea of taking His blood and putting it in my ketchup, and I LOVE ketchup.
(on)
Hmm. . . I'd give you the "Brilliant!" poster, but there's just one problem, the cosmetic line of products. Remember our Quaran of The Party, "1984"? Makeup was banned due to it making our whimin less equal then men.
(off)
I couldn't think of a non-religious book, do you have one?
(on)

Commissar_Elliott wrote:On a part of the subject though, us sitting here, typing on our computers and NOT helping on the community farm. . . aren't we hurting the Party and the community at large?

How dare you, sir?! Why, we who sit all day at our computers banging away at the keyboards form a vital, no the most vital link in establishing the world of next Tuesday. Why, w/o our superior planning ability, our remarkable collective insight, and our inattentiveness to things in our immediate surroundings nothing would ever get done in immanentizing the eschaton and accomplishing the overthrow of the bourgeoisie. Next time, sir, that you have an idea such as this might I suggest dunking your head first into a vat of Lienenkugel's (Summer Ale if possible)?

(Sigh) At the level I'm at, which is still equal to all, thinking is a hard job, maybe I need to go on vacation, but I have been AWOL for a bit on here bashing stipud moonbats on another, more local forum. That vat of beer sounds like a good idea Rex, drown out my ideas


What, you thought you were going to escape it ?

A non-religious book? I thought that WAS the koran.

AbecedariusRex wrote:A non-religious book? I thought that WAS the koran.

Hahahaha. . . very true.

One other thing that caught my attention was the word "disinformation." The original English word is "misinformation."

"Disinformation" is a direct translation of the Russian word "dezinformatsiya," used by the KGB in its subversive campaigns, espionage, and propaganda. I remember the official claims of the Soviet state-run media that all the information leaking into the USSR about the alleged "success" of the Western economies was disinformation designed by the capitalist propaganda. The short KGB jargon form of this word was "deza."

"Disinformation" is of the same semantic origin as "disorientation" and implies the existence of a deliberate conspiracy to misinform and disorient. In this sense, the use of this word by Obama's department of agitation and propaganda is very telling

Here's a dictionary definition:

dis·in·for·ma·tion
n.
1. Deliberately misleading information announced publicly or leaked by a government or especially by an intelligence agency in order to influence public opinion or the government in another nation: "He would be the unconscious channel for a piece of disinformation aimed at another country's intelligence service" (Ken Follett).

2. Dissemination of such misleading information.

[Possibly translation of Russian dezinformatsiya.]

Years ago I read William Safire's column "On language" in which he delineated the difference between "misinformation" and "disinformation," but I can't find it on the Web now except on the NYT site that is offering to sell this article for $3.00. I've always thought Mr. Safire was full of hot air, and that's just from reading his language column, but he was the one who made me realize that "disinformation" was a lone directly from the KGB usage.

I wonder if anyone else picked on this - or it's just my own radars going haywire.

Perhaps we can ask for an explanation from the "Hot for Words" lady Marina Orlova.

wow. another fan of Marina Orlova - but then how could you NOT be?

In related news...

Peeing Lenin statue promises free drinks for the masses