The People's Cube - Political Satire

Comrades, normally it is unprogressive to apologize, and rest assured, I'll be spreading blame in a progressive fashion in a minute, but please let me explain first, then blame second.

Here in the bunkers of the Commissar of Time's Central Temporal Planning Office and Lollipop Factory, not only are we shielded from the various effects of Temporal Manipulation and the various paradoxes that might arise from it, but we also have really bad teeth, thanks to the abundance of vodka flavored lollipops. All that aside, we labor day and night working to ensue the Current Truth(TM) is reflected throughout *all* of history.

Bourgeois history books carry many inconvenient facts, that like the old Soviet Encyclopedia must be changed out regularly. So here, deep in the bunker our powerful computers are working with the Central Planning office to make sure history truly is politically correct.

Which also run Windows Vista. Some nameless (and executed) prole left their computer unsecured, and a virus got in. The damage sadly was done, and the Berlin Wall came down 20 years ago. We are working rapidly to secure the situation and undo the damage, and rest assured Comrades, we will. Meanwhile manipulating the last 20 years is hard work, and you are encouraged, nay ordered to remember that you are on People's Time(TM) and the DDR still exists.

To ensure that such unfortunate errors such as the one that caused the fall of European Communism, and the rise of the BushHitler, we are no longer using Windows Vista, and are switching to Windows ME, as well as some old super computers salvaged from a 1960's era Soviet missile silo.

Actually you'll never notice that The Wall Came down, as shortly after you finish reading this, we will have been able to retroactively correct time. By the way Comrades, any odd paradoxes or whatnot are simply glorious side effects of the use of People's Time(TM) and are to be celebrated.

The Berlin Wall: Still there.

We really need to do something about the bourgeois graffiti on western side of the wall. My idea involves a few hundred thousand troops and several panzer divisions of T72s.

Remember comrades, these are the "good guys". (Pardons for using the prejudicial terms "good" and "guys".)

Oh crap, I nearly forgot this somber tear jerker.


Delicious copypasta from the poster of this video:

Not Political! Feel free to do that in the comments Just a tribute to the men and women who fought for their Sozialistische Vaterland! I used a sad song because it sad that some great nations too have to fall.

Hey there sad comrade, don't worry your little empty Prog head! The Glorious Deutsche Demokratische Republik hasn't fallen, it's just resting for a bit!

I must say, had I known the wall would someday come down so easily, I would've insisted that it be built thicker, say, all the way to the Atlantic ocean.

Thankfully Obama is intent on building his new wall East to the coast of Normandy and West to the glorious People's Republic of San Francisco.

Let's see all those bourgeois chiselers tear that down.

More glorious proof of the Colonel's mastery of time: http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id ... _article=1

Yes, we should not despair. Little by little an new wall will be built. As you know, the purpose of the wall was to keep progs in, not to keep them out. And we do have a law now that doesn't completely keep a comrade in, but it goes a long way towards that end.

If an evil capitalist decides that taxation here is too high, and decides to move and renounce his citizenship, there is now a law in place that will confiscate all of his property immediately, thus giving him pause before he decides to renounce his citizenship and move to an evil kapitalist country with lower taxes.