The People's Cube - Political Satire

Oh Massa O,

I want to be dependent on you for my health care! I can't wait! You're so close to making sure of it. I look forward to having the IRS take monthly payments out of my bank account for the public option!

I want to be dependent on you for my housing allowance! I'll take $3000.00 or whatever you'll think I should have.

I want to be dependent on you for my education! The government loans are the best, because I'll be sure to pay them, and even if I declare bankruptcy, I won't be able to get out of the obligation. I like that.

I want to be dependent on you to help me decide when to die! When the time comes, I want to receive free counseling to advise me that it's better to just take a pain pill than get any kind of surgery that could fix my problem, because, after all, I won't be long for this world, anyway.

I want to be dependent on you to tell me what to throw away and what to recycle! I want you to send the garbage police to my house to make sure to penalize me if I accidentally throw away an aluminum can.

I want to be dependent on you to control my thermostat temperature because you know best. And I want you to put the coal companies out of business, so that the only choice I have is more expensive and less reliable wind turbine energy. That way, I'll be sure to lessen my carbon footprint, especially if you are going to fly around in Air Force One, that way, my actions will make up for your heavy carbon footprints. It's the least I can do for you.

I want to be dependent on you to give me a shovel ready job!

I want to be dependent on you to control how many cans of soda pop I drink with special taxes on my soda pops.

I want to be dependent on you to tell me what kind of car to drive.

Oh Massa Obama, I want to depend on you for everything!

I want, I want, I want...

Ask not what Obama can do for you, ask what you can do for Obama.

Dear Leader doesn't ask for much, just your undying loyalty and obedience (and maybe your first born child for Americorps).

I know, every good progressive wants things. But Obama is all things to everyone. Now that we have Obama, what more could we want?

By Leninka

It is most noble of you to point how hard Papa Obama is working for us.
I can only hope that I have enough money to give him

I want that beautiful silk jacket he's wearing today in Singapore!

Neotrotsky wrote:

By Leninka

It is most noble of you to point how hard Papa Obama is working for us.
I can only hope that I have enough money to give him

I know Dear Leader wants very much to make service in AmeriCorp mandatory. If he ever gets his way, then you will not only be able to give him more of your money, you will also be able to hand over your children.

Comrade Leninka,

You're an inspiration to all of us.

Comrade Grigori,

That is because I have never been so devoted to a Dear Leader as this one. My only regret is that I didn't get to be in that stadium in Denver, the night he accepted the nomination and defeated our Many Titted Empress, fair and square.