The People's Cube - Political Satire

**12/6/2009, 8:42 pm**

Comrades, I stumbled across a disgusting counter-revolutionary website one night while looking for porn inspiring patriotic hymns about President Obama. They were peddling something called "Demotivators". Here is one example of the bilious trash they spew:

GOVERNMENT
If you think the problems we create are bad, just wait until you see our solutions.

https://despair.com/viewall.html

Fellow disciples of Obama, I don't want to be an alarmist but I am, after all, a Progressive and so it is in my blood. Anyway, it is apparent that some amongst us may be unpatriotic fifth columnists who WANT to see glorious President Obama and his People's Revolution FAIL! Yes, I know that is hard to believe but it is true! (I know; I'm one of them!) In order to counteract this destructive trend, we must start with an antidote to the poison of the Demotivators. In this vein, I present some examples of my concept of OBAMIVATORS^*!

^*obamivate: a glorious new word which means to become inspired and motivated by the greatness of President Obama.
Example: Only raaaaacists are obamivated to change the channel when our greatest president evah appears on television!

HOPE
Hope is not a method. Unless you're a politician.

CHANGE
Things could be worse.... and they will be.

TAXES
Things are worse than we thought and we may have to raise taxes instead of cut them. I'm sure we're all cool with that.

NARCISSISM
It's not conceit if you're really as good as you think you are.

RESET
Racists call it "obsequiousness".

ARROGANCE
You knew I was better than everybody else, that's why I WON.

EQUIVOCATION
I did not change my mind but I did need you to hear my other points of view.

REFORM
Draining the swamp always exposes the toxic waste dump site beneath.

UNITY
In unity, there is strength. Not to mention oodles of cash.

GROWTH
From little ACORNs, big scandals one day grow.

CIVILITY
When your opponents begin using your tactics against you, it's time to change the rules.

DISSENT
A couple of years ago, these people made sense; now, they're just morons.

SCIENCE
If the theory doesn't explain the data, then the data is wrong.

COMPETENCE
One shudders when one thinks how close we came in 2008 to having an idiot one heartbeat away from the Presidency.

**12/6/2009, 10:36 pm**

Opiate of the People wrote:Comrades, I stumbled across a disgusting counter-revolutionary website one night while looking for ~~porn~~ inspiring patriotic hymns about President Obama. They were peddling something called "Demotivators". Here is one example of the bilious trash they spew:

GOVERNMENT
If you think the problems we create are bad, just wait until you see our solutions.

Comrade,

I'm sort of torn by this denouncement. On one hand, I fully agree with you about the Government insult, but one the other, this could be an older version generated during the evil Bushitler era.

And following your lead, I decided to also view those "Demotivators", but I found some quite inspiring to the proles:

Achievement

You can do anything you set your mind to when you have vision, determination, and an endless supply of expendable labor.

Now what more can you say about this? This is rather inspiring, just see what the Egyptian Government achieved. Remember, their leaders WERE gods, just like ours.

Get to Work

You aren't being paid to believe in the power of your dreams.

Just imaging the inspiration of the proles with this hanging in the area before/after work (as opposed to the breakroom, our proles don't get breaks).

Perseverance

The courage to ignore the obvious wisdom of turning back.

Now just imagine if our Dear Leader decided to follow Bushitler's policies instead of forging his own. I feel very inspired that our Dear Leader ignores the ~~wisdom~~ follies of the past.

And finally:

Sacrifice (Temple)

All we ask here is that you give us your heart.

What more can I say? ...

**12/6/2009, 11:00 pm**

Comrades, this is one of the worst capitalist websites of all times. Look, for example, at these shirts this company sells:

Or, see this poster which mocks our Dear Leader's lapdog!

(prog off)

I have bought a number of things from this website over the last couple of years. Always a hilarious company to work with.

**12/7/2009, 3:33 pm**

{offski}

Heh. I am not a fan of despair, but I am a fan of Despair, Inc.

"They say the clothes make the man. These clothes make the man sad."

**12/7/2009, 6:09 pm**

I am proud to say this Demotivator captures the true spirit of our Progressive cause:

BAILOUTS
From each according to his ability,
to each according to his lack thereof.

**12/8/2009, 12:55 am**

I denounce the demotivational posters! I read some of them and they made me depressed, just about making my day a complete void of darkness. Someone help me!

**12/8/2009, 4:09 am**

Excellent work, Opiate! Let me add these to begin with:

Honest Government
Would You Like To Buy A Bridge, Real Cheap?

Workers World Party
The Last Thing We Actually Do Is Work

Working Families Party
The Last Thing We Want Is To Work Or Have Families

Planned Parenthood
The Last Thing We Actually Want Is Parenthood

Employee Free Choice
The Last Thing We Want You To Have Is Choice

**12/8/2009, 2:26 pm**

And one more:

PROGRESS
The Audacity Of Going Back
To The Pre-Industrial Society
Ruled By A Benevolent King

**12/8/2009, 6:48 pm**

Comrade Square, I found these posters very Obamivating. I would not be suprised if the Central Committee rewards you by having Al Gore write you a poem or something. There's nothing like a nice long poem by Al Gore ~~and a pack of matches~~ to keep one warm on a cold winter night.

And seeing Obama, Reid, Pelosi, Waxman et al talking about "Honest Leadership" and "Open Government" makes me want to obamivate all over my monitor. Too funny.

The People's Cube - Political Satire

I Denounce Demotivators!