2/9/2006, 5:45 pm
In a last ditch effort to get Gitmo detainees to end their hunger strike in response to eating infidel cuisine, the US has decided to feed them their Koran to keep them from starving to death and giving yet another impetus for the Muslim world to hate America.
A Berkley-trained lawyer representing the Gitmo detainees has made it clear at a news conference today, that "The US will not succeed against another great Muslim blitzkrieg. Those Muslims know how to stick it in our asses! You show them peace and conciliation, they will start an intifadah. Show them disengagement and withdraw, they will give thanks to the terrorists that ostracized their society and ruined their communities. Show them democracy, they will elect islamofashionists. Give them weaponry to repel their Soviet invaders, they turn and want to attack us with the very same weapons. Give them aid and a helping hand, they will have marauding demonstrations declaring death to America, burning our flags and embassies. Offer them commerce and free trade, and in turn they will fund terrorist squads to kill us. Open our borders to adopt their oppressed in our free society, and they will conspire to attack our civilians and demand sharia law for their unassimilated communities. Depose a genocidal Muslim maniac responsible for killing more Muslims than anyone in history, and to thank us they will kill and maim our troops and waste our treasure. Give them legitimacy in the global arena, and they will take hostages to thank us with detached heads in hand for a limitless promotion to our mouthwatering free press. Show them the gift of free speech so they can threaten to kill us for practicing ours. Give them a pound of flesh and they will surely cut off our hand with a money back guarantee! What brilliant strategic thinking by them islamofashionists, I hope they keep it up and lord knows that the DNC needs to a be a hell of a lot more up front and center in helping the islamofashioning cause! Right now the DNC has been just using threatening and encouraging language, they need start backing it up with some action!"
When asked what this Gitmo lawyer thought America should do to end this string of Muslim foreign policy successes, he exclaimed, "America needs to accept monitoring by independent organizations and adhere to the Geneva convention to the fullest. In addition, we must impeach George W. Bush and have him surrender under his own recognizance to the world court, accept UN sanctions for atrocities committed against Muslims, and end the outrageous wiretaps and the continued unlawful interment of these courageous freedom fighters here at Gitmo!"
A Berkley-trained lawyer representing the Gitmo detainees has made it clear at a news conference today, that "The US will not succeed against another great Muslim blitzkrieg. Those Muslims know how to stick it in our asses! You show them peace and conciliation, they will start an intifadah. Show them disengagement and withdraw, they will give thanks to the terrorists that ostracized their society and ruined their communities. Show them democracy, they will elect islamofashionists. Give them weaponry to repel their Soviet invaders, they turn and want to attack us with the very same weapons. Give them aid and a helping hand, they will have marauding demonstrations declaring death to America, burning our flags and embassies. Offer them commerce and free trade, and in turn they will fund terrorist squads to kill us. Open our borders to adopt their oppressed in our free society, and they will conspire to attack our civilians and demand sharia law for their unassimilated communities. Depose a genocidal Muslim maniac responsible for killing more Muslims than anyone in history, and to thank us they will kill and maim our troops and waste our treasure. Give them legitimacy in the global arena, and they will take hostages to thank us with detached heads in hand for a limitless promotion to our mouthwatering free press. Show them the gift of free speech so they can threaten to kill us for practicing ours. Give them a pound of flesh and they will surely cut off our hand with a money back guarantee! What brilliant strategic thinking by them islamofashionists, I hope they keep it up and lord knows that the DNC needs to a be a hell of a lot more up front and center in helping the islamofashioning cause! Right now the DNC has been just using threatening and encouraging language, they need start backing it up with some action!"
When asked what this Gitmo lawyer thought America should do to end this string of Muslim foreign policy successes, he exclaimed, "America needs to accept monitoring by independent organizations and adhere to the Geneva convention to the fullest. In addition, we must impeach George W. Bush and have him surrender under his own recognizance to the world court, accept UN sanctions for atrocities committed against Muslims, and end the outrageous wiretaps and the continued unlawful interment of these courageous freedom fighters here at Gitmo!"