The People's Cube - Political Satire

Yes! Not only does it make popcorn, but it stops TIME ITSELF! Special Weapons Czar, Comrade Just_a_Car found and refined this device.

Our goal is to install it on the next fleet of blockade runners peaceful aid ships headed to terrorist happy landPalestine. When the beleaguered defenders disgusting Juice attempt to seize our ships, WE WILL STOP TIME ITSELF! Of course there are a few wrinkles to be worked out, such as how to stop time, and still send ships through and whatnot, plus issues of paradox, overcooked popcorn, and just what kind of knife is best to issue to Peace Activists(TM) but those are just details.

Knives?! Dear Commissar Colonel, we cannot be issuing such things to terrorists expendable troops Peace Activists™.

Not unless they are Party-Approved™ People's Knives™. Being the current owner of the Original People's Rifle™, I would be happy to consult the junkyard scrap heap People's Armory™ for an appropriate edged weapon to issue to our Peace Activists™ in their glorious goal to help terrorists kill jews spread the good word of Mother Amerikkka.

Ahh excellent point. Just as we have the People's Rifle, we need a Peaceful People's Blade(TM).

Indeed!... I shall go straight away and begin my scrounging for The People's Blade™.

And we to know just the person to be of making for distribution of The People's Blade™

Mrs Al Czarweary - if I were Pinkie, I'd give you the coveted and prestigious Beet of the Week Award.

Comrade Red

I have to remind you that I am the Beet of the Week.

And since I am the Dear Dictator of the People's Republic of Zimbabwe, all awards awarded to me are for life.

For instance: In Africa the Democratically Elected President is Elected President for Life.
(That is why our motto in Africa is One Man, One Vote, Once)

Following the same very Progressive reasoning it is logical that while I am alive, there can be no other Beet of the Week!

Amandla!

Obamugabe

(In all humility. I commend mrs Al for her originality.)

Red Square, just for you to say so is like to be of receiving such prestigious award. And like all I to do, it is for the exaltation of The Cube™ and also to be for the Good of The Children™ . Onward to Glorious World of Next Tuesday™ !

As for you Obamugabe, do you not to be knowing it is the Sunday and so it now to be the next week? But I also to see you make for commending and to make good use of poster. Redistribution of poster for The People™ is always good Progressive way.

Now that's what I've been talking about. You put the pride, the excitement back into the Progressive movement with that People's Blade Runner image. Kudos Mrs.Al.



Obamugabe,
That cartoon really says it all. The fanatics don't care if you're a Conservative, Liberal, Progressive or whatever. To them it's very clear, black or white and no greys. You're either an Infidel or not.

Obamugabe wrote:Comrade Red

I have to remind you that I am the Beet of the Week.

And since I am the Dear Dictator of the People's Republic of Zimbabwe, all awards awarded to me are for life.

For instance: In Africa the Democratically Elected President is Elected President for Life.
(That is why our motto in Africa is One Man, One Vote, Once)

Following the same very Progressive reasoning it is logical that while I am alive, there can be no other Beet of the Week!

Amandla!

Obamugabe

Run. While you still can. I have seen Pinkie withdraw Beet of The Week and give it to someone else, and I think she has even given two Beet of the Week. Also, she isn't above blackmailing me with her shovel to make sure that the definition of "week" is changed to suit her award giving preferences. We all may have power and positions of authority, but Pinkie manages to transcend them all. I just don't know how she does it.

The People's Blade Runner. I love it!

Eyes Only:
Commissar Colonel 7.62,
Too much talk about time manipulation is not such a good thing. The masses may learn the real truth....................

Remember the '60's movie Dr.Strangelove? It really happened. An errant US General got it in his head to do a first strike on our beloved Soviet Union. Unlike the movie, all the planes and missiles got through. A nuclear holocaust the likes of which the world had never seen ensued.

Fast forward to the early 21st Century. The survivors having to rebuild just about everything, decided to model their new Governments after the old US. Gold was of course the monetary standard everywhere. Freedom and free enterprise became the standard for all. This ushered in a period of prosperity and peace the world has never known.

We corrected all that. All it took was a short jump to the 60's. We dealt with the General and here we are. This memo will self-destruct in 10....9.....8....

Really

How should I tell my mom at the end of the week to remove her bumper sticker?

Do YOU want to risk telling her she has to remove her bumper sticker? I THINK NOT!

I AM MORE SCARED OF MY MOM THAN OF PINKIE!

Now you know the Truth.

Amandla!

Obamugabe

Nice knowing you Obamugabe. Maybe Pinkie will just use one of Comrade Just_a_Car's People's Blades(TM) on you instead of your shovel.

Comrades, I have the perfect People's Knife of Peace. I give you the Malco Tools DK6S Ductwork Installer's Knife. It features a comfort grip handle, a six inch blade, double edged with one edge serrated for sawing through fiberglass insulation (or Israeli ribs). This is not a weapon! It's a workman's tool. Workers of the World Unite!

WHAT?! I Denounce Comrade Whoopie for suggesting such a dangerous weapon of Capitalist workers be issued to terrorists uneducated proles Peace Activists™.

As Special Weapons Czar, I have scoured the dumpster scrap heap People's Armory™ and determined the perfect load out for our army of activists.


(Click for Larger Image)

A people's rifle with the bayonet sheath epoxied in place and a plastic steak knife, made in Korea (North, I'm sure, but it only says "Made in Korea" with glorious Communist Chinese writing above it) and a RED Coca-Cola, brought from near-socialist, anti-Amerikkkan Canada.

Comrade Car

What exactly is the function of the Coke bottle?

I believe it's meant as part of the load out for People's Activists(TM) (Not the Religion of Peace Activists(TM) who carry steel knives and heavy clubs) but rather our useful idiot activists. Not only is it a refreshing beverage, but when empty, it can be thrown into the street to make an awful mess.

Colonel 7.62 wrote:I believe it's meant as part of the load out for People's Activists(TM) (Not the Religion of Peace Activists(TM) who carry steel knives and heavy clubs) but rather our useful idiot activists. Not only is it a refreshing beverage, but when empty, it can be thrown into the street to make an awful mess.

Comrade Colonel...... Coke bottle have many uses besides containment of refreshing beverage when relaxing after hard day's work of advancing the Collective! Also can be used as containment vessel for crude oil collected from Gulf spill, and has added advantage of being good substitute for same-type filled vodka bottle for the makings of glorious cocktail (of Comrade Molotov's design)!

Indeed, Comrade Boris has the right idea.

After hyping one's self up on caffeine and sugar from a RED labeled bottle, our Activists may then fill it with revolutionary flammable liquids and burn in the name of The Party™.

Colonel 7.62 wrote:

timemachine.jpg

Yes! Not only does it make popcorn, but it stops TIME ITSELF! Special Weapons Czar, Comrade Just_a_Car found and refined this device.

Our goal is to install it on the next fleet of blockade runners peaceful aid ships headed to terrorist happy landPalestine. When the beleaguered defenders disgusting Juice attempt to seize our ships, WE WILL STOP TIME ITSELF! Of course there are a few wrinkles to be worked out, such as how to stop time, and still send ships through and whatnot, plus issues of paradox, overcooked popcorn, and just what kind of knife is best to issue to Peace Activists(TM) but those are just details.

Comrade,

It is most urgent that the above device is finished and made available for immediate use" because the Progressive country of Iran plans on sending "aid ships" to Gaza

Obamugabe wrote:People's blender-blade runner

But, but, but... Will it blend?

I'm not authorized to offer any Beets but I hear the leaves are delish!