The People's Cube - Political Satire

My fellow comrades:

We simply do not appreciate Dear Leader enough. First the Teabaggers didn't thank him for lowering their taxes while the rest of us struggled to scrape up enough money to get new tattoos and upgrade our cell phones and iProgs. Now, even the media stands accused of not thanking him for answering their questions about how enchanted he is with the presidency, or Bo the Dog's latest tricks. Nor have they thanked him for granting them numerous photo-ops that show him playing with Bo the Dog, or of him staring thoughtfully out of windows, or gazing at portraits of predecessors almost but not quite as great as he, or even those glorious photos of the back of his head.

We've never thanked Dear Leader for the Recovery Act that surely none of us can argue has touched all of our lives, just as he promised it would. Instead, all we've done is whine and complain because it hasn't done enough, even though we'd be so much worse off without it.

We've never thanked him for a lot of things, and all of us can surely agree that we absolutely do not deserve anything he has done for us. But with Thanksgiving just around the corner, I think this would be a great opportunity for all us to express our gratitude to Dear Leader.

So here's what I propose: Use this thread to post a thank you note to Obama. Tell him how much you appreciate him for all he's done for America. Then get as many people as you can to come here and post their thank you notes. Tell them to get as many people as THEY can to come and post something. And so on and so forth.

And while I don't wish to state the obvious, you don't have to be a U.S. citizen or even literate to show your appreciation for and gratitude to Obama!

Thank him the way you would vote for him: As many times as you like!

If we can gather enough thank you notes, or at least make it look as if we have trillions of them (because Obama likes seeing everything in trillions), maybe we'll send them to the White House to cheer him up!

IMPORTANT: You must be thankful ONLY for what Obama has done. You cannot express thanks for your family or friends or good health (unless it's the result of Obama's health care reform), or any of the usual tradcrap* the masses tend to moon about this time of year.

*Please note I have coined a word.

P.S. I apologize to Leninka for the Obamacentric topic, but perhaps this will raise awareness of how little SHE appreciates Dear Leader! (Because unlike her, I care.)

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Commissarka Pinkie is a regular contributor to The People's Cube, and is renowned and admired by the masses for her dedication to raising awareness of how much she cares. When she isn't making an issue out of everything, she enjoys beating proles with her shovel, spending other people's money, and indulging her Obamaphilia with Obamabilia until she's Obamabilious.

Yay, I'm first!

Above all else, I would like to thank Comrade Obama for his unabashed support for the socialist cause.

First of all, he boosted the deficit off the charts, even faster than Bushitler had ever dreamed of. This is obviously a good thing, as our Chinese communist comrades and Saudi Muslim brethren can own more of this racist country's bonds.

Secondly, his $3,270,000,000,000 stimulus provided funds to oppressed, downtrodden big banks and businesses all over America in their historically inevitable struggle to overthrow the bourgeosie (i.e. small businesses and the middle class) and establish a dictatorship of the cronytariat. I myself received $2,500,000 worth of "tax cuts", which I have wisely used to bribe, I mean, socially agitate my way into the People's Cube.

Thirdly, on the global stage, he has revitalize the classic left-wing concept of doublethink. He has shown that a president can meet with the most heinous tyrants in the world without promising this during his campaign, and still don't have to close Gitmo and end the military "don't ask, don't tell" policy like he actually guaranteed.

Last but not least, his triumph in 2008 showed greedy, racist Rethuglicans that even a son of an African Muslim and a leftist academic with ties to Frank Marshall Davis, Bill Ayers, and the Democratic Socialists of America can masquerade as a bipartisan centrist who holds peoples' interests above those of government czars. (Hahaha! This still cracks me up!)

Komrade Korean Kim Lady:
You gave Red Square $ 2.5 millions to post here ?
He let most of us do the same thing for twenty bucks and a coupon for an extra large
pepperoni pizza.

Must be of the inflations, yes ?

Krasnodar wrote:Komrade Korean Kim Lady:
You gave Red Square $ 2.5 millions to post here ?
He let most of us do the same thing for twenty bucks and a coupon for an extra large
pepperoni pizza.

True, Comrade Krasnodar, but as I said, I received it as part of Dear Leader's Five-Year Plan. So it's really taxpayers' money, poured directly into my coffers to "subsidize education" for a "racially disadvantaged child".

But membership in the People's Cube is worth every cent of American taxed income. And besides, there's new stimulus money coming up.

[img]/red/images/clipart/Prog_Off.gif[/img]

A New Stimulus....its a classic business model....if something doesn't work, repeat it.

Unfortunately, we have a President ( I have such a hard time capitalizing that title nowadays)who thinks "profit" is Mohammed's middle name. His first name, was of course, " The ".

Comrades,

I am most grateful for Dear Leader's rock solid grasp of domestic and foreign policy matters.

His grasp of economics is unbelievable!

Our allies and enemies know exactly where we stand.Our position in the world has never been more secure.

I am thankful that I will NOT have to change my OBAMA TAT due to recent unclean thoughts I read.
Praise & Hopey Lives On in Dear Leader!

Thank you Dear leader for corralling the teeming hordes of greedy small less equal businesses across this great socialist state.

During my daily activities as obsolescence planner for the Office of Other Peoples Technology and Subsystems, I smile secretly when another of these dangerous capitalist leeches meets an overextended underfunded comeuppance as his doors close and his open signs go dim and his checks go unpaid.

We can not have renegade enterprise loose in this land. It is a danger to the status of the state and an insult to the cause of social justice.

I wish to thank Obama for nothing. Yeah, you heard me. For 2 long years I been standing next to my mailbox waiting for my stimulus check from his personal stash...nothing.

I got no check for weatherizing my dacha. I received no foodstamps. My house isn't being foreclosed on. My credit card is paid off so I can't write off any of that debt either. I'm not sick so ObamaCare which won't start for another 4 years hasn't helped me one bit. My carbon footprint is already lower than the national average without me even making any lifestyle sacrifices so I get no respect for that.

I short, because I'm no burden to society or even the planet I get a big fat nothing. Not even a cheesy mass produced presidential award suitable for framing.

At least Hillary would give me some token recognition.

Commissarka Pinkie wrote: IMPORTANT: You must be thankful ONLY for what Obama has done. You cannot express thanks for your family or friends or good health (unless it's the result of Obama's health care reform), or any of the usual tradcrap* the masses tend to moon about this time of year.

*Please note I have coined a word.

And the word of the day is ... "tradcrap"!

Signed copy of Pinheads and Patriots on it's way to you Commissarka!

P.S. I apologize to Leninka for the Obamacentric topic, but perhaps this will raise awareness of how little SHE appreciates Dear Leader! (Because unlike her, I care.)

Commissarka Pinkie is a regular contributor to The People's Cube, and is renowned and admired by the masses for her dedication to raising awareness of how much she cares. When she isn't making an issue out of everything, she enjoys beating proles with her shovel, spending other people's money, and indulging her Obamaphilia with Obamabilia until she's Obamabilious.

Of course you care, Comrade Pinkie. This is the problem with you white girls. Always taking a little too much interest in our men, as if we have plenty of eligible Harvard graduate light skinned black men to go around.

Yes, you are korrect about us not appreciating Dear Leader's efforts, but, as you know, it's more our nature to complain, that to be appreciative. It's like pulling teeth, because as you also know, no matter how much progress we make towards the Progressive World of Next Tuesday, it's never enough, but here goes.

Okay, I'm thankful that I was able to purchase a new Cadillac with the cash for clunkers program, and some extra scamming of the system (I used $3000 of a hand out to help me in a rent program toward the car, instead). So there, if it weren't for Dear Leader, I wouldn't be driving around in a Union Made Obama Motors vehicle.

Leninka, you're absolutely correct that it's the nature of Progs to complain and never appreciate what they have. It's just that we should never complain about Obama, and as he's pointed out on more than one occasion, we should be more appreciative of him and what he does. It's clear we all need some training in this area, since we're so unaccustomed to it.

And as I pointed out above, he's ALL we should appreciate, the ONLY person--nay, being--to whom we should give thanks.

Next time anyone tells you "Thanks," instead of saying, "You're welcome," you should reply, "Don't thank me--thank Obama."

I am giving thanks now to the dear leader, soon that bright new Chevy Volt will hit the showroom. A 40,000 dollar four seater that needs a re-charging from a coal fired electrical power plant...man talk about brilliance.

I'm so glad he is in charge of the national purse and bail-outs to help our economy.