The People's Cube - Political Satire

Romney Professes Faith in Humans-Cause-Global-Warming Belief-System as Revealed in the Latest GAIA Minister Neytiri Naked Truth Report on Romney's Town-Hall Meeting in New Hampshire on June 3, 2011.





--GAIA Minister Neytiri

Excellent! Congratulations Minister Neytiri. It's obvious you've made a believer out of Romney. Who's next? Trump? He said last night he may run as an independent. I'm sure he would be a push over for your charms.

He has always been a fellow traveler, no one is really sure what he believes.

Major says: Me neither.

I entered heaven and I saw a beast before the throne which had many faces. One face was like unto socialized medicine, one face was like unto abortion, one was liberal, one was conservative. Other faces were hidden and obscure. I wept when I saw this confusing beast because I knew it's slippery tongued power over mankind. And on his foreheads was a name Only Choice.

I didn't realize he was such a progressive Progressive. He sounds just like the person who ensure dear Leaders reelection, does he not?

ThePeoplesComrade wrote:I entered heaven and I saw a beast before the throne which had many faces. One face was like unto socialized medicine, one face was like unto abortion, one was liberal, one was conservative. Other faces were hidden and obscure. I wept when I saw this confusing beast because I knew it's slippery tongued power over mankind. And on his foreheads was a name Only Choice.

That wasn't heaven, Comrade. It was the main office site of my employer.

Grigori E.R. wrote:Excellent! Congratulations Minister Neytiri. It's obvious you've made a believer out of Romney. Who's next? Trump? He said last night he may run as an independent. I'm sure he would be a push over for your charms.

Trump is already on our side. Indeed, he's been sending me images for years. (He sends me pictures of his money as proof that he's "green.") Gotta go now-- I need to console Gingrich-- we owe him a lot for all those man-is-overheatig-the-planet commercials he did for us several years ago with Nancy Pelosi.




--GAIA Minister Neytiri

I can hardly wait for the 2012 "election" - watching those Rethuglikans try to pick between the 37 (so far) lame entrants is going to be hysterical.

Neytiri, welcome to the Cube. You may have been here before, but I'm a Made Prog, and indeed I'm Father Prog Theocritus, the proggiest of the progs, and I don't notice anything which I can't steal, lie about, or calumniate.

It is gratifying that you've shown us what a spineless, attention-seeking pussy leader of the people that Mitt Romney is. I knew he'd see the light.

It is MOST gratifying to see that he is rolling over for the people who rightly ignored the complete meltdown of the anthropogenic global-warming hysteria on the exposure of the emails from the Climactic Research Institute of the University of East Anglia.

I mean, when the main man has lost the data and says he's not good with keeping data, and when they spend their time trashing people who might stupidly, and in the most unprog way, resist on having their entire lives uprooted for a complete lie, it's nice to know that the Repubs have a really good useful idiot in Mitt Romney.

Father Prog Theocritus wrote: It is MOST gratifying to see that he is rolling over for the people who rightly ignored the complete meltdown of the anthropogenic global-warming hysteria on the exposure of the emails from the Climactic Research Institute of the University of East Anglia.

I sent wife # 23 to the Climacteric Research Institute of Harare when she experienced Global Warming Hysteria.

They said it was a hormone deficiency. So I decreed that everybody in Zimbabwe has to take oestrogens to combat this Global Warming business.

Amandla!

GAIA Minister Neytiri wrote: Trump is already on our side. Indeed, he's been sending me images for years. (He sends me pictures of his money as proof that he's "green.") Gotta go now-- I need to console Gingrich-- we owe him a lot for all those man-is-overheatig-the-planet commercials he did for us several years ago with Nancy Pelosi.




--GAIA Minister Neytiri

Minister Neytiri,

You will be most pleased to learn that The People's Cube has it's own religion and church. The Reformed Church of Latter-Day Climatology. Better know as The Goremons. We strictly adhere to the teachings of the Prophet Al-gore (ccbuh). And we deal harshly with Man-made Global Warming deniers... or as I like to call them ...... INFIDELS!!!


Hail Obama!!!

--
Zampolit B. S. Blokhayev
Grand Inquisitor, The Reformed Church of Latter-Day Climatology (aka The Goremons)

Zampolit Blokhayev . How kind and Progressive of you to remind our Comrades of my high status as the Founder of the New-Age Pantheopianism, which, thanks to Comrade Romney, we can now publicly identify as the Goreman Church of Latter Day Climatology.



--Gorbels Cube

Romney is a shifty liar that I can vote for.

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Romney is a shifty liar that I can vote for.

He would make an excellent Democrat!

Meow, so glad to see you again. What? Have you run out of proles' pockets to run through? I recall the last time that I saw you on the streets, you had your hand in your own pockets.

That made me sad, very sad, but then I figured that with you down and out, I could get more of your Hummels.

I'm a made prog, you know, and we're made that way.

I suppose that Romney would be a good Trojan horse, and he would grow in stature. As Georgetown unfolded its omnivorous cloaca, Mr. Romney, never quite seated where the salt is, would squirm with the pleasure of a puppy being petted, and roll over, for his soft underbelly to be scratched.

And that's all we need, you know. Just some RINO. Washington, thank Lenin, corrupts entirely.

The worst thing on earth would be term limits, for it would tell people that they (1) had to be nice to real, tax-paying citizens, and (2) they'd have to get a real job.

Father Prog Theocritus wrote:Meow, so glad to see you again. What? Have you run out of proles' pockets to run through? I recall the last time that I saw you on the streets, you had your hand in your own pockets.

Proles, yes. Middle-class pissants in fly-over country, no. I have an operation stretching from Indiana to Kansas where I have cockney street urchins fleece unsuspecting soccer moms and other assorted fat American suburbanites. I'm making a small fortune and just enough to remain a well-heeled member of the Georgetown cocktail circuit.


Mitt Romney is a good man and he deserves our respect. Anyone who is filthy rich, handsome, opportunistic, and lacks core beliefs always has my support. Ugh, such a pity we lost John Edwards. Such a pity.

Meow, now I, like you, am a scam artist and there is something--artistic--in having Cockney street urchins. Or as Holmes called them, street Arabs but I don't think that his crew murdered people.

Still, I've found it better not to use Brits. I've been going back to that old gypsy custom of, I think, nastase--take a child, cut off its nose, slit the cheeks to the back of the jaw, and remove the gums. Oh, and bind a leg or two so that it grows bent.

This is very good for giving.

I will also use it as the poster boy for anyone in Medicare. After all, they're just eating up money without making any. Either way, we win.

Now do not diss core beliefs: we have them, but we just can't talk about them.

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:

Father Prog Theocritus wrote:Meow, so glad to see you again. What? Have you run out of proles' pockets to run through? I recall the last time that I saw you on the streets, you had your hand in your own pockets.

Proles, yes. Middle-class pissants in fly-over country, no. I have an operation stretching from Indiana to Kansas where I have cockney street urchins fleece unsuspecting soccer moms and other assorted fat American suburbanites. I'm making a small fortune and just enough to remain a well-heeled member of the Georgetown cocktail circuit.

You mean you work for the IRS?

IRS (Institute of Redistribution & Sharing) always needs a few good men. We are experiencing exponential growth in these exceptional economic times.

ThePeoplesComrade wrote:IRS (Institute of Redistribution & Sharing) always needs a few good men. We are experiencing exponential growth in these exceptional economic times.

Like you, our Superkommissar Maksim has recognized the special importance of the IRS:

Comrade Gaia, thank you for the excellent graphic reference supporting our call to arms. It is impossible to keep up with the wealth of material here on The People's Cube without the assistance of our dedicated watch dog community.

ThePeoplesComrade wrote:IRS (Institute of Redistribution & Sharing) always needs a few good men. We are experiencing exponential growth in these exceptional economic times.

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