10/16/2012, 1:09 pm
COMRADES
If you were like me last Thursday, waiting with bated breath in anticipation to watch 'ol Joe apply tried and true Prog logic and debating skills on an unwary prey, then you must have concluded, as I have, that 'ol Joe left little to the imagination of his sheer prescience, his indisputable Prog facts, his New Tone Of Civility™, and a genuine passion brimming with so much substance you could cut it with a dullard's knife! There is very little 'ol Joe is ever wrong about — his I.Q. can only be bested by a few, but he can still puff out his chest, pull out a gaffe from nowhere, and bonk you on the head into Next Tuesday™.
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The decision is unanimous that the contest was owned by 'ol Joe, in the same sense as a quarterback would punt a poodle. He guffawed, showed his big teeth and conquered. Some have claimed his behavior boorish and out-of-hand — and they're completely WRONG in their assessment: 'ol Joe LIVES in Next Tuesday™. He's already got a mansion there while we're still dreaming about its conception.
'Ol Joe is SO far ahead of the game that it just may make progs throw their copies of Rules For Radicals and Das Kapital into the garbage while they conform to the dark side of CONservatism, but I digress.
Let's recap some of 'ol Joe's finer points.
'Ol Joe called out the "malarkey" when he seen it: A U.S. ambassador sodomized and brutally murdered, along with 3 other Americans, by adherents of the Religion of Pieces, as they easily overtook the facility by force. Meanwhile, Dear Leader was somewhere in the Forbidden Land of Las Vegas raising funds for his perpetual campaign, and was unavailable for comment — even to the intelligence agencies.
Despite what has been known, what we do know, and what is being revealed daily, an American who was blamed for the video is now being detained in jail without bond, and no hope of getting out any time soon. The "video" that purportedly caused all this violence that coincidentally happened on 9/11 has now been determined that only those proponents of Islam can see it: it's invisible to infidels.
Dear Leader struck from the national lexicon "Islamic terrorism" and "terrorists". When he shot bin Laden and killed him dead, he effictively ended terrorism because he knew that bin Laden was the single cause for ALL terrorism in the world. Spiking the bin Laden football didn't create any more terrorists — even though thousands of people screaming "WE ARE ALL OSAMA!" are believed to be SEIU-funded "occupussies" fulfilling their next assignements.
The "malarkey" 'ol Joe was pointing out wasn't the tragedy that happened, but was the audacity; the sheer chutzpah, that some greenhorned whippersnapper would dare tread on the very soil of the gross negligence, incompetence and dangerous security FAIL of U.S. territories abroad. You just don't go there in the land of Next Tuesday™.
Once again, 'ol Joe's rapier wit catches yet another "bunch of malarkey". 47% is THE magic number that's going to take down Mittens™. This notion that there are 47% of the population who don't pay their fair share, or are "takers" is utter nonsense! Of course they give more than they take in the same sense as if you had to clean up whale droppings on a daily basis.
'Ol Joe's neighbors, unfortunately, are probably waiting right now in the unemployment lines for their share of the Obama Stash™. Scranton PA suffers from the same unemployment curse that the rethuglikkkans keep braying about with all their numbers and statistics. 'Ol Joe admits his mom and dad fit this image and why shouldn't they?
This is why I.Q. counts: it seeks and destroys hypocrisy by its sheer implication, and 'ol Joe is the "John Holmes" of I.Q.. 'Ol Joe's "Malarkey Meter" was going off the scale on this one as he caught the greenhorn with his boxer shorts down. How dare a rethuglikkkan congressman request stimulus funds for his constituents! That's NOT what this money was earmarked for! This is UNION MONEY! This is O'BAMA SUPPORTERS' PAYBACK money! This is the Chitcago-style SLUSH FUND used for O'bama-purposes ONLY!
'Ol Joe correctly pointed out that the HYPOCRISY lies not on what the money was actually used for, but for pointing it out and then making a request for funds to be used as they were intended for. The audacity!
'Ol Joe said the investigations about where the money ended up didn't pan out to much. There was no evidence about cronyism, waste or fraud:
