Dems add Fed vote Card Check to 'must pass' CR. GOP submits

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In a move that's sure to upset the vast majority of the Tea Party caucus, the Democrats in the House have introduced an amendment to the "must pass" government funding extension bill, known as a continuing resolution, that would fund additional election workers to check the votes of all constituents to ensure that they vote correctly and are not disenfranchised by confusing "yes" or "no" choices.

After the confusion of "hanging chads" in Florida in 2000, and the confusing addition of Republican candidates in parts of Philadelphia in 2012, many Party™ members have suggested that it's time the confusion of choice is ended and that advisors be sent to all polling stations to observe and correct the erroneous ballot choices of the unsuspecting electorate.

"Clearly, many of the voters are confused about the different designs of ballot papers," said Democratic Chair, Debbie Wasserman-Schultz. "Different States have different rules and this can be very confusing. Especially if people relocate.

"We have tried electronic voting machines to standardize voting in many locations but that doesn't seem to be working and Republicans keep trying to hamper our efforts to encourage voters to have their voices heard by introducing voter ID legislation and other infringements on voters' rights - such as not allowing felons or undocumented Americans to vote.

"If there is a non-partisan election worker at every polling station who can properly advise voters as to how they should vote, then we can eliminate all of the costly legal battles that seem to always follow closely contested elections.

"We hope to make closely contested elections a thing of the past"

John Boehnor stated "The CR must be passed. We don't want any more bad press about a government shut down and we don't think it's unreasonable that the Democrats get everything they ask for. Minorities have rights. Also, it's not unreasonable to have checks in place to make sure people are voting the right way."

When Democratic presidential front runner Hillary Clinton, MTE, MBS, was asked her opinion of the proposal she responded:

"I ain't no ways tarred. Aah's come too faaar, from where Ah started from."

When asked for clarification of her statement she responded:

"I.....I don't recall. What difference, at this point, does it make? I never had a computer in my office and I never saw any classified material."