The People's Cube - Political Satire

(BAGHDAD) Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki cautioned yesterday that the United States could face civil war if disunity continues among differing factions in the United States Congress.

"If we can trust CNN and the Arabic edition of The New York Times, it's only a matter of time before a civil war breaks out between the red states and the blue states," Maliki said to a hushed audience of Iraqi veterans and their families, suggesting that the fanatical leaders of Congress "be ousted as swiftly as a convicted thief's left hand is separated from his arm in Saudi Arabia."

"I believe the tenor of rhetoric in Congress grows so extreme that it will likely lead to a brutal civil war among rival political factions," Maliki said.

He singled out Senators Harry Reid, Patrick Leahy, Carl Levin, and Charles Schumer as well as Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, calling them "haboobs," an Arabic slang term which, loosely translated, means "castrated camel jockey."

"We here in Iraq know a show trial when we see one," Maliki said, referring specifically to the Senate's repeated attempts to take down Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez for the purpose of having the Democratically controlled Senate appoint a new attorney general so that impeachment proceedings against President Bush could begin. "Civil wars have started for lesser reasons," he added.

In what Maliki termed a polite and well-meaning push, he has put the US Congress to a timetable, saying that he expects resolution to several important domestic issues before the first Presidential primary in 2008.

"It is Harry Reid's and Nancy Pelosi's 'last chance'," Maliki stated, making quotation marks in the air with his fingers. "For if the divisive rhetoric doesn't stop, these extremists should voluntarily step down, or members of their party should oust them in the interest of unity."

Maliki urged Congress to come back immediately from its vacation to deal with many unresolved issues. "Permanent tax cuts are a must," he said, "but the issues of immigration and social security, as well as domestic oil extraction and building new refineries are also crucial in preventing the otherwise inevitable slip into anarchy."

Maliki apologized in advance for comments that might appear "discourteous," but added, "It's about time someone said them."

Comrades, the impending civil war in America cannot be won. We must immediately redeploy before it turns into a quagmire from which we can never extricate ourselves. We must do this for the greater good, the children, the environment and so we don't mess up our impeccably coifed hair styles. We must immediately implement plan YELLOW SKIDMARK and flee!

The coming civil war is becoming evident in many ways. Have you seen the underhanded attempt at denying the vote to Floridians by the Bush-Rush-Rove Axis?

WASHINGTON (AP) - Florida Democrats would forfeit their votes in selecting a presidential nominee unless they delay their state election by at least a week, the national party said in a stern action Saturday meant to discourage others from leapfrogging ahead to earlier dates.

The Florida party has 30 days to submit an alternative to its planned Jan. 29 primary or lose its 210 delegates to the nominating convention in Denver next summer.

The state party chairwoman, Karen Thurman, said she would confer with state officials about the ultimatum. "It's going to be a difficult discussion," she said, because Floridians are wary of having their votes taken away.

https://apnews.myway.com/article/200708 ... 9GUG0.html

If you read the whole article you will see how it is Bushitler and his brother that is behind this clever scheme to deny progressives the vote.

Comrade Betinov wrote:We must do this for the greater good, the children, the environment and so we don't mess up our impeccably coifed hair styles.

Yes! Our coifed hair styles! BRILLIANT! Darwin help us if anything should happen to our expensive hair-dos! My Darwin, I must have laid down $500 big ones at a swanky Beverly Hills hair cuttery just to get my *glorious* hair creation ABFAB!

HAND OFF MY HAIR! THE WORLD IS WATCHING (And we must look our best!).

The next logical step would be to secretly weaponize our hair so we may strangle our opponents without leaving finger prints or anything else that would allow suspicion.

Kinda like her:

Demoncats and Iraqi terrorists agree on one thing: imperialist America must be defeated. Then Republicans and Christians must be tossed to the lions only then will there be world peace.

Comrades,

If true, this impending AmeriKKKan Civil War, is when The Party™ must strike in the name of World Socialism!!! Then we can enslave ... er ... I mean ... liberate the workers of AmeriKKKa just as their brothers and sisters are in France! And put an end to America's imperialist warmongering, once and for all time!!!

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Another excellent opportunity to activate our fifth-column proletariat ballot stuffing poll spammers to further the common good.

2011 International Socialists Technical Upgrade For Red Jihad And Islam

Comrade Hasan said;"Demoncats and Iraqi terrorists agree on one thing: imperialist America must be defeated."

They've been doing a pretty good job demonizing Amerikkka Comrade. They're still working on the defeated part.