The People's Cube - Political Satire

.
That's me here, Komrades:



Me - good Ol' Karl Marx, in local vernacular Nüschel (nishel, for you Komrades across Big Pond), meaning Noddle.



Me - world's Nr. 2 Marx-Head¹, from head-top to beard-bottom a cute 23 ft 4 in.
Hewn in - jawohl! - Ukrainian granite.

The inscriptions behind me say Workers of the world, unite! in many beautiful languages. Embedded in likewise splendid Le-Corbusier-style architecture. Yeah, that Le Corbusier, daddy of glorious Brutalism.

¹ The 25 ft Nr. 1 is in Ulan-Ude, capital of Buryatia (which is a Republic of Russia, itself the result of Yeltsino-Putinian subversion of Glorious Motherland).


And now see my latest, of Aug. 27 [from Chemnitz, now GULAGed away - see UPD. below] :



(4 minutes, and note me, Nüschel, @1:00 and subsequently)
~
(the "Nazis raus" @1:33, that's of course our revolutionary community organizers of Antifa)
(guy @1:38 comments: the Left of today don't get it, that it's them who operate Nazi-like)
(@2:45 a minute of silence, whereupon heroic Antifa goes ape)

(Komrades documentary-nerds may wish to skim more)

UPD. Sigh. Zyensura rolls. See ↓ ersatz. That ↑ was a crisp, curt, and sober pic of Monday's rally.



And here Nüschel's testimony:

I knew I would be in trouble, when they shlepped me to Saxony. Saxony, the land of Saxons. Saxons, the most recalcitrant, rebellious, and sassy among all the populus Germanicus (Bavarians, Swabians, ... , you name it, Komrade). Saxons, the pest. Napoleon knew it, Churchill knew it, Genosse Ulbricht knew it.

Why didn't they shlep me to Dresden, Saxons' capital? Simple. In the year which saw Comradissimus Stalin ascend into Eternal Red Glory, they - Saxons, but only the red-tinted ones - renamed their third biggest city. And then they shlepped me to that glorious city which now was Karl-Marx-Stadt.

Once here, they saluted and honored me. Cute pioneers brought me flowers. Foreign wreath-laden apparatchiks bowed stiffly to me. Once in a while Stakhanovite brigades gave me a shower. And they even nicknamed me, Nüschel. Which is Saxon for Nischel, ze Noddle.

But three-and-half decades later damn Saxons, this time the non-tinted ones, started shouting Wir sind das Volk, We are the people, and Freiheit nicht teilbar, Freedom not partable, and Keine Gewalt, No violence. And some such. GDR - just another brick in the wall - collapsed.

Next, they erased "Karl-Marx-Stadt". Chemnitz it was now. As - they claimed - it always was.

They got freedom. They got kkkapitalizm<spit!><spit!>. They got multiculti. What a progress!
And now they march again. Wir sind das Volk! Das ist unsere Stadt! Lügenpresse! Widerstand! Merkel muss weg! We are the people! This is our city! Lying media! Resistance! Merkel must go!

What is it, what do they holler for? They didn't want The Red (on the side: Oh, what Glory it was, Komrades! boo-hoo...). What is it, they don't want this time? Someone tell me, comrades...

Oh, how would I love to again sing the Internationale.
Or see Genosse Pieck, Genosse Ulbricht, Genosse Honecker bowing to me.
Or turn back into a nameless boulder of Ukrainian granite, there - between Dnipro and Dnister . . .

All glory to Nüschel! He did it!
Komrades, great news! The Ostblock aroma, DDR 2.0 is back here!
(Komrades Amerikkkans - that would be Eastern bloc and GDR, ja?)



Chemnitz, Sunday 26th, 3:15 a.m. tragedy, 12 hours later huge demo (registered, approved) at Nüschel, at evening huge improvised march. German nationwide MSM (TV first) just ignored it.

Monday, Nüschel square, huge demo again. By then, polit-media complex (and Speaker of Government leading) got its act together and made up its mind concerning the standardized wording-to-belch-out. "Zusammenrottungen (riotous gang-ups)", "Hetzjagden (hounding)", "Hass auf der Straße (hate in the streets)", "Ausschreitungen (riots)", "Menschenjagd (manhunt)". As for participants, the rubber-stamped catalogue, applied blanketly, is: "right-wing extremists", "mob", "Nazis".

Those "transmissions" tactics are so damned obvious, also to a big part of the "masses" here:
1) Make fuss about demos (while the murder itself - and its "parameters" - fades, vanishes).
2) Make them Saxons - sweepingly - "Nazis", by extension shame Krauts in toto.
2a) thereby, (hope to) keep "masses" from marching the streets, shouting the 1989/90 "We are the people!" - which became the casket nail of GDR.
3) Focus on "riot", "hate", "mob" - thusly avoid "AfD" in all this (big elections soon, in October!)
4) Bit by bit, bend feelings of (obvious!) ultraviolence imported continuously since 2015, to "poor refugee, ze victim".
5) By Nüschel, don't allow the machinations of the current elite - especially since 2015 - come again under broad public scrutiny! (elections! elections! ze horror!)

Pretty shocking, yet not unexpected, that "Chemnitz + riot + hate + extreme right + manhunts" lingo went one-to-one into - now worldwide - headlines.

Even a UN High Kahuna (a certain Said Raad al-Hussein) wagged a finger towards Germany. Tone: "Spectre of fascism returning to Germany?".

Pogroms!

Heihitlas!

Saturday!




Oh, what glory!
Happy old days are back! Ostblock! One (state-controlled) news agency, for zyentral messaging. All (state-controlled) main Pravda's and all (state-controlled) regional Pravda's transmit agency's zyentral messaging. The regional Pravda's add local apparatchik content, local soccer league, local weather. Unity! Equality of Content! Masses Normalized in Thinking!

As you know, Komrades, there was a microcrack pressure leak on ISS, viz. a Soyuz MS-09 Earth-to-ISS-and-Back spacecraft "parked" to ISS at an ISS' Rassvyet module.

Under harsh scrutiny, the tiny crack confessed that it was not caused by a micrometeoroid, nay, it was done by the hand (and drill) of a less-than-Stakhanovian kulak who even left unmistakable traces of his deed.

"It is essential to see the reason, to learn the name of the one responsible for that," Rogozin [DirGen of RosCosmos, the manufacturer of Soyuz MS-09] said. "And we will find out, without fail."

Komrades, no idea what your (or DirGen Rogozin's) interrogations already revealed, be it with or without brutal beating.

But I, here, sense comrade Nüschel whisper: "... must haf been one of ze Saxons, you gif all zem Chemnitz kulaks a Lubyanka treatment!"

"It is essential to see the reason, to learn the name of the one responsible for that," Rogozin [DirGen of RosCosmos, the manufacturer of Soyuz MS-09] said. "And we will find out, without fail."

They have been found!

It was said that those guilty of the incident have been found and will be punished by repeatedly forcing their bodies through a .080" extrusion die until they confess.

I guess She Guevara has always had that "I just stuck my finger in a live light bulb socket" look....

Captain Craptek wrote:... will be punished by repeatedly forcing their bodies through a .080" extrusion die ...

Well, Craptek, that adds quite a new meaning to "intrusion", ja?

On the other hand, maybe Comrade Soyuz MS-09 did it itself? Just punctured - bang! - the microcrack, or whatever it is, in his/her/its own body?
All that in a sudden rush of a sex-free-choice epiphany? And longing for, you know, a front hole?


While at that, a philosophical question: What's comrade Nüschel's gender? Nüschel, a pure head - and no front hole, no back hole, no nuthin?

Papa Kalashnikook wrote:... [Comrade She Guevara] "I just stuck my finger in a live light bulb socket" ...

A rumor has it here - Chemnitz - that Comrade Nüschel, upon reading these glorious news (and contemplating the appended electrifying visuals), got full on fire to also stuck something into that socket - finger or whatever!

But soon he cooled down, realizing that there is no there there - finger, whatever. Only his Nüschel-Nishel-Noddle, world's Nr 2, sizewise. And how do you stuck such an XXXXXL into a light bulb socket?


(Comrade Nüschel: Oh, how I wished Komradette Putout could find a way to visually materialize my put-in desire... the socket.... She Guevara's socket..... her revolutionary eyes rolling wild.....)

Big Heads Think Big.
Nüschel: Why Novichok? Just put 'em clients in a pierced Soyuz thingy, shoot 'em in space, done.

Genosse Dummkopf wrote:a philosophical question: What's comrade Nüschel's gender? Nüschel, a pure head - and no front hole, no back hole, no nuthin?

Ask Ivan Betinov. His brain expands every time he thinks about it, to a point where he blows his lid.

Comrade Ivan Betinov a.k.a. Brain in a Jar


As for the who made a hole in the spaceship, I'm not sayin' it was the aliens, but it was the aliens. They get lonely in space.

In space, no one can hear you scream "Yes, baby!"

Unless one is wearing a tinfoil hat specially designed to capture alien copulatory vocalizations.

Red Square wrote: In space, no one can hear you scream "Yes, baby!"

Unless one is wearing a tinfoil hat specially designed to capture alien copulatory vocalizations.

Indeed, tinfoil (and chainmail) hats have many uses.