6/2/2020, 11:47 am

What is riot logic? It's the belief that any superficial parallel can be made to justify your emotional rage and assure everybody of your moral superiority.
Sound like fun? Well, you too can become a Social Media Puritan and an expert in Riot Logic! It's not hard. In fact, the less you think about it, the better. Here are some useful pro tips to guide you on your way to becoming the next SMP (trade secret - being White has certain advantages for SMPs).
Here we go!
- You can blast someone else's shortcomings more effectively if you use lots of profanity while claiming to be more like Jesus. Use that reprimanding tone! For example, "Listen here, you dumb*&^%! Wear a !##%%$* mask in public! Jesus said to love your neighbor! Just what the *^%# do you think you're doing not wearing a mask? Do you want to cause the next genocide? You're such a *%@#.
- Make superficial parallels like comparing the Boston Tea Party with random looting. Don't let the facts get in the way! Things like the tea being a direct assault on the livelihood of the colonists and the fact there was no looting of private businesses are distractions that require historical knowledge. Don't go there.
- Compare AntiFa with Allied soldiers attacking Normandy. Nazis were known for acts of bullying, intimidation, and destruction of property before they really went big and started a campaign of mass ethnic slaughter. AntiFas are only known for bullying, intimidation, and destruction of property, but so far have only beaten a few elderly people bloody. So, yes, they're just like the soldiers who hit the beach at Normandy.
- Conditional statements are simple and easy for the masses to understand, and they flood your synapses with the dizzying rush of self-righteous indignation. Here are some well tested starters to get you warmed up: If you don't wear a mask in public, you support police brutality! If you oppose police brutality, you should cheer when retail stores and Black owned businesses are burned to the ground!
- Turn Whiteness to good advantage with White Guilt™. For example, you can regurgitate the usual talking points of a) All Whites are racist, and b) Only Whites are racist. Are you White? So much the better! You can bathe in false guilt while enjoying the rush of moral superiority that comes with flaunting your self-flagellation in front of your White friends who "don't get it." Show those losers that you know more than anybody what it's like to grow up Black in the inner city even if you've never been there.
Well there you go. With just a few pro tips and by paying close attention to those memes, you can become the next Social Media Puritan and get noticed! At the same time, you'll become giddy with excitement as those angry and tearful emojis start rolling in with more angry posts of affirmation.



