The People's Cube - Political Satire

If you haven't yet seen the hashtag #socialistteeth trending, it is our path to victory over the pearly whites of capitalism - an oppressive system where the sparkling white teeth are not being shared with the downtrodden.

The real symbol of capitalism should be not the Wall Street but the Molar Street, where greedy dentists extract money from the rich in exchange for perfectly white teeth, which are then being flashed in corporate offices to the owners of other perfectly white teeth, as a gang sign to identify their membership in the capitalist gang or to antagonize members of other gangs with poor oral hygiene.

The time has come to end this white menace by showing our solidarity with cavities, caries, and other forms of tooth decay. We must never again brush our teeth, making them yellow or even brown, and instead direct our energies towards shaming the owners of white teeth - and if met with resistance, knocking out those pearly whites for redistribution among the needy.

Demand that Congress ban porcelain veneers and implants, mandating such materials as wood, metal, or chert. Outlaw the practice of dentistry as the immoral tool of capitalist inequality!

In our Glorious Progressive World of Next Tuesday, no one will ever feel offended by other people's white smiles, as all teeth will be equally of the color of weathered wood.

The Left isn't just anti-Semitic, the Left is anti-Dentite.

A message in a bottle from 2012...

The First Black Pepsident Fights White Tooth Guilt

Are your teeth whiter than your neighbor's? Use Party-approved First Black Pepsident and no longer look better off than others! It fights white tooth guilt by making all teeth equal. The future of collectivized dental care! 9 out of 10 government officials recommend!

Get rid of that embarrassing million dollar smile. It's so 20th century!

When white teeth are outlawed, only the outlaws will have white teeth.

In USSA, we think green and recycle our ideas. We cannot create too much carbon foot print.

Hammer and Loupe wrote:In USSA, we think green and recycle our ideas. We cannot create too much carbon foot print.

So now we must have green teeth? Oh dear, it is so difficult to keep up with woke requirements.

RedDiaperette wrote:So now we must have green teeth? Oh dear, it is so difficult to keep up with woke requirements.

Catnip, Komradette ― catnip!

WAIT! Comrades!

'pelipsky is having PTS flashbacks to interrogation by Nikki Haley. It was kind of horrifyin', comrades. 'pelipsky was in the hot seat getting grilled by Senator Nikki Haley and the heat of Haley's kleig light flashing white teeth was blinding the eye of the mythical horned rodent like the headlight of an F-150.

Here's a tape of the 'actual' interrogation, comrades. NOTE: Wear polarized shades before viewing this set of white teeth and the intimidating power...

still trembling in recovery,
'pelipsky

Make sure that your children learn to darken their teeth before their teeth grow in. It's never too early to start.