The People's Cube - Political Satire

The Winter Olympics are proving a recruiting tool for Al Qaeda like no other this year. The arrogant displays by spoiled brats Bode Miller, all snow boarders, and uber-effeminate skater Johnny Weir have proven disastrous for our troops.

"That little arrogant skating fruit Johnny Weir has the face that launched a thousand IED's" said specialist Stuart Yablonsky. "How are we supposed to push Democracy with these people in Iraq when they turn on the TV and see someone that 99% of people would like to see exploded?"

Ditto, it seems, for Bode Miller and Lindsey Jacobellis. "How could that stupid girl try a show-off move at the end of the race," exclaimed Hamid Ali Khan, as he shined his RPG launcher. "I will kill 1000 infidels for Islam to protest her arrogant display!"

Sgt. Jeff Milner stated, "Bode Miller has long been a self-proclaimed "wild child," which is code for "arrogant prick" in my book. And he keeps getting disqualified! How about racing and shutting up! I can't walk the streets of Mosul without taking heat for this guy!"

When asked about their behavior, the Olympic athletes responded, "It's all about the bling-bling baby!" as their Mommies shuttled them to their 4-star hotels.


Bode Miller: "Arrogant, me? No way dude!"


Johnny Weir: "What atrocity is this?" -- Aga Ali Khan, Insurgent


Lindsey Jacobellis: "Arrogant infidel! How dare she perform an unnecessary Nose Grab at the end of the race! How could she blow the gold!" -- Hamid Ali Khan

What about ME! How about paying attention to ME! I won the 1000 meters! I did it all myself. Don't touch the chip on my shoulder! So what if I refuse to race with my team -- they didn't get me to the Olympics, I DID IT MYSELF!

Weir on CBS wrote:Interviewed on CBS' Early Show this morning, Weir explained that he knew he wasn't at his best on the day of the long program, and in particular wasn't "feeling pretty." Then, waxing philosophical, he noted that things aren't always perfect. If they were, Michelle Kwan would be skating, and <b>"we wouldn't be in Iraq</b>."

The typical anti-war male in action! First priority -- fruity skating. Second priority -- feel pretty. Third priority -- national security!

Here's our favorite skater sporting his(?) party approved warm up gear.

Is that second picture of a guy or a girl?

Kommissar, that is technically a boy. However, if he were scored on "masculine technical merit" he would receive a 0.0

Kommissar Betty wrote:Is that second picture of a guy or a girl?

Gender is umimportant. It is a barrier that was created by the capilaist machine to seperate and discourage us from organizing.

Now back to your shovel and sickle, Betty.

Now back to your shovel and sickle, Betty.

Yes sir....