Page 1 of 1
9/30/2010, 2:29 pm
Red Square
The white brain, beset with worries, finally goes haywire in spectacular fashion
About 12:01 on the afternoon of January 20, 2009, the white American mind began to unravel.
It had been a pretty good run up to that point. The brains of white folks had been humming along cogently for near on 400 years on this continent, with little sign that any serious trouble was brewing. White people, after all, had managed to invent a spiffy new form of self-government so that all white men (and, eventually, women) could have a say in how white people were taxed and governed. White minds had also nearly universally occupied just about every branch of that government and, for more than two centuries, had kept sole possession of the leadership of its executive branch (whose parsonage, after all, is called the White House).
But when that streak was broken—and, for the first time, a non-white president accepted the oath of office—white America rapidly began to lose its grip.
To read more of this parody, click below.
Mystery item No. 1 Gotcha - it is not a parody!
It's a
lead editorial in yesterday's Village Voice - a self-described alternative newsweekly in New York with a reputation for "free-form, high-spirited and passionate journalism." It is the recipient of three Pulitzer prizes, the National Press Foundation Award and the George Polk Award, as well as a past winner of both the National Press Foundation's Online Journalism Award and the Editor and Publisher Eppy Award for Best Overall US Weekly Newspaper Online.
The only award missing is the prestigious Pinkie's Beet of the Week award, which I'm sure is coming for this editorial and front page cover.

Hide it back (Turn mouse upside down and click. If that doesn't work, try standing on your head)
9/30/2010, 2:43 pm
Vladimir_Scratchanitch
Published on Wednesday, August 13, 2003 by the Guardian/UK
Study of Bush's Psyche Touches a Nerve
by Julian Borger in Washington
A study funded by the US government has concluded that conservatism can be explained psychologically as a set of neuroses rooted in "fear and aggression, dogmatism and the intolerance of ambiguity".
As if that was not enough to get Republican blood boiling, the report's four authors linked Hitler, Mussolini, Ronald Reagan and the rightwing talkshow host, Rush Limbaugh, arguing they all suffered from the same affliction.
FULL STORY
~ON THE OTHER HAND~
Veteran psychiatrist calls liberals mentally ill
Publishes extensive study on 'Psychological Causes of Political Madness'
Posted: November 12, 2008 6:33 pm Eastern
© 2010 WorldNetDaily
WASHINGTON – Just when liberals thought it was safe to start identifying themselves as such, an acclaimed, veteran psychiatrist is making the case that the ideology motivating them is actually a mental disorder.
"Based on strikingly irrational beliefs and emotions, modern liberals relentlessly undermine the most important principles on which our freedoms were founded," says Dr. Lyle Rossiter, author of the new book,
"The Liberal Mind: The Psychological Causes of Political Madness." "Like spoiled, angry children, they rebel against the normal responsibilities of adulthood and demand that a parental government meet their needs from cradle to grave."
While political activists on the other side of the spectrum have made similar observations,
Rossiter boasts professional credentials and a life virtually free of activism and links to "the vast right-wing conspiracy." FULL STORY
I admit that I have a certain "intolerance of ambiguity".
9/30/2010, 2:49 pm
Red Square
Thank you, comrade, for maintaining an impeccable media archive on this. Which reminds me of our own responses to such claims in the past:
The Socialist Brain of a Liberal Democrat
Republicanism Caused By Brain Disorder, Mutation

9/30/2010, 2:54 pm
The Red Terror
I get my news from the ONLY reliable sources: Pravda, Tass, The Village Voice, Laika the Space dog and The Peoples' Cube.
Great Ceasers Ghost! You had me going Red, up until I read the rest.
But when that streak was broken—and, for the first time, a non-white president accepted the oath of office—white America rapidly began to lose its grip.
If "White America" (which is a lie, because as we know, Dear Leader is the great Unifier) lost it's mind after the election, it's only because everyone else lost their minds before the election.

Surely a BOTW award is waiting for these hard working
propaganda artists seekers of the Truth™.
9/30/2010, 4:16 pm
Fraulein Frankenfeinstein
Yes, Pravda is not what it used to be, when they only printed the correct, government endorse news of the week. Now they blather on and on about free enterprise and other subversive, useless topics. I am filled with thrilledness that the Village Voice is still doing the job that needs to be done. . . umm, well, along with NY Times and a few thousand other papers. (DOWN WITH FAUX NEWS!!!)

I used to find this sort of trash news much more annoying, but the fact is, now so many Americans and voicing their opinionn on the trash they print, regurgitatee and propagandizee, that I can laugh at it.... and them.
9/30/2010, 4:21 pm
Proletarian Robot
Comrades: We are very fortunate to have an expert commentator on this subject the famed neuropsychologist Dr. GargleDildo had the following to say:
Dr. Janeane Gargledildo
"The reason a person is a conservative republican is because something is wrong with them. Again, that's science – that's neuroscience. You cannot be well adjusted, open-minded, pluralistic, enlightened and be a republican. It's counter-intuitive. And they revel in their anti-intellectualism. They revel in their cruelty."
9/30/2010, 4:47 pm
Fraulein Frankenfeinstein
umm, I think I have to take back my last sentence. I have this overpowering, unenlightened, anti-intellectualist urge to spit.
9/30/2010, 5:05 pm
Obamugabe
But when that streak was broken—and, for the first time, a non-white president accepted the oath of office—white America rapidly began to lose its grip.
My Comrades!
I must denounce this journalist as a RACIST!
It is common knowledge that your Dear Leader Imam Hussein Obama is JUST AS MUCH WHITE AS HE IS NON WHITE!
So why is he described as the first NON white president? Why is his non-white half more important (or for that matter, less important) than his white half?
I denounce this journalist and demand that he be sent for End Of Life Counseling immediately!
One Racist One Bullet!
oBAMUGABE.
9/30/2010, 5:07 pm
Comrade Whoopie
Journalism hasn't been the same since the Weekly World News was put out of business by their space alien overlords.
9/30/2010, 5:14 pm
Obamugabe
9/30/2010, 5:40 pm
Commissarka Pinkie
Comrades, I am in love with Steven Thrasher, the author of subject article!
I read his words, so obviously written from the heart, and I feel that I have finally found my soul mate. Here is someone special who thinks exactly as I do! I no longer feel alone, as if my voice is never heard.
Comrade Thrasher is sweet and sensitive, and like, totally understands me!
At long last, I can justify my subscription to
Modern Bride magazine!
Now where is my Hello Kitty diary? I have a new entry to write:
I
Steven T.
Comrade Thrasher + Commissarka Pinkie =
4 ever and ever into infinity and beyond +1!
Mrs. Pinkie Thrasher
Mrs. Pinkie Thrasher
Mrs. Pinkie Thrasher
My love offering to my darling Stevie Thrasherkins:
Comrade Thrasher, won't you "Beet Mine" every week, and not just Valentine's Day?
Oh, and as long as I'm here and we're on the subject of stuff we can't even make up anymore, coupled with people who have totally lost their freaking minds:
Obama Endorses Supposedly Nonpartisan Jon Stewart Rally
9/30/2010, 5:50 pm
Comrade Whoopie
Proletarian Robot wrote:
garofalo2.jpg
Dr. Janeane Gargledildo
"The reason a person is a conservative republican is because something is wrong with them. Again, that's science – that's neuroscience. You cannot be well adjusted, open-minded, pluralistic, enlightened and be a republican. It's counter-intuitive. And they revel in their anti-intellectualism. They revel in their cruelty."
Said the sad, angry, greasy little girl with stringy hair who's into self mutilation.
9/30/2010, 5:59 pm
Commissarka Pinkie
How dare you say that about me, Whoopie!
WHACK!!!
Oh wait, you meant Janeane. Well, as you should know, she's my role model, someone I look up to as a true, ideal Progressive woman should be. In which case, how dare you say that about Janeane!
WHACK!!!
Wow, look what two whacks did to the ice pick in your head. Looks like you won't be able to sit down again, unless you can provoke me into a third whack to dislodge it.
9/30/2010, 7:21 pm
Krasnodar
About Janeane ........... Useful ? Perhaps. Idiot ? Without question.
She'd be the first to get loaded onto the boxcar at platform five.
9/30/2010, 7:33 pm
The Skinnee Jay
Remember the Eminem's song, "White America"? Time to update:
White America
Controlled by Jews
White America
How I wish we would lose
White America
We're white like crack
White America
And our president is black
9/30/2010, 7:43 pm
pjl_u2
pjl_u2 wuz here
without tinfoil hat on and left no You Tube posting
As far as my franco white mind goes, i'll be sure to bring that up with the Bishop during my session with him next week.... no sofa but i do get to play with the computer while under his supervision. The parish even let's me in the front door during daylight hours.
9/30/2010, 9:17 pm
Ivan Ivanobitch
Weekly World News is now Weeknight Stewart Show. Content is very creditable and predictably compliant to will of Glorious Leader.
Comrade Whoopie wrote:Journalism hasn't been the same since the Weekly World News was put out of business by their space alien overlords.
9/30/2010, 10:32 pm
Krasnodar
Prog definitely OFF.
It is curious that politicians and press of the far left are the first to separate races.
Also amusing is their complete denial that " whites" helped vote Obama into office.
In my estimation, their coming fall can't be hard enough.
33 days, boys........ just 33 days.
9/30/2010, 11:09 pm
Ivan Betinov
Gentlemen, Pinkie has spoken. Steven Thrasher is her chosen. Have him washed and bound. And get that man a red hat.
9/30/2010, 11:23 pm
pjl_u2
Flying Bat Boy lives, the problem with the brains, and the "elections" just around the corner...
Remember the '80's when SOUND reighkwinger "kristian" morals had all listening to Nancy's ASTROLOGER? She warned you all to stay off the drugs!
https://www.legislation.gov.uk/uksi/1989/485/made
Now, who took my prozak?
p.s. Does anybody know wether Pinkie has a sister? If so, what color is her babushka?
p.p.s. I no like Steven Thrasher ANYMORE :|
10/1/2010, 12:35 am
IServeTheSovietUnion!
It may seem to some that it is dangerous to reveal this aspect of Party stratergery, but Comrade Thrasher is on safe ideological grounds. It seems certain that the fascists are going to triumph in the coming elections, but all intelligent Party members understand that it is only a matter of time before we import enough votes to overcome the tricks of these dirty rightist dogs, so it does no harm to reveal our true feelings. Scientific socialism will triumph, even without science! Or money! Or indoor plumbing!
10/1/2010, 12:55 pm
60's Sweet Pea Flower
Ooooh, I just love Steven Thrasher. That's right, if capitalism won't give us the race war Karl Marx wanted, we'll agitate with propaganda until we get it!
Democrats and progressives are not racist! Just because that's all we talk about, it doesn't mean we're racist, it means we're Enlightened™.
Peace, Love, & Flowers!