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Obama's Lapdog Named Media

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UPDATE: We now have a special page where all installments are gathered in chronological order:

Media the Lapdog for Obama


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Image Image Image Image Image Image Image
This has been a collective effort.
Many thanks to those who contributed.
Concept by General Secretary.

Next One:
Blagojevich Hits The Fan


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Update from Red Square

Once again, under the unwavering Party leadership, Commissar Maksim has reached an unparalleled success in advancing progress through visual agitation! This is not to say that other visual agitators on the People's Cube haven't reached an equally unparalleled success in covering this development.

See a take by Big Fur Hat here:

Media buries a bone from Obama's closet.

It has caught on! Damon Bryan Shackelford of Delta BravoSierra has sent us these:

Media The Lapdog and Sheeple<br>Media The Lapdog Shows its "O" Face

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Awesome. Simply awesome.

I'm sending links to this to lots of people

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Outside of a media lapdog, a newspaper is man's best friend. Inside a dog, it's too dark to read. - Karl Marx


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Red Bubba wrote:Outside of a media lapdog, a newspaper is man's best friend. Inside a dog, it's too dark to read. - Karl Marx

I'm pretty sure that quote belongs to one of the other Marx brothers.

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I foresee a long a loyal friendship. What a wonderful story for our times! Media, the poor lost pooch, has found a home where he is a beloved lapdog... his loyalty will be rewarded - The Obama will feed him and cultivate an ever deepening relationship with Media, who will guard The Obama and his family from dangers such as the evil wily Fox. He will have fun on the extensive White House lawn, playing with the friendly squirrels who love to hide acorns and other nuts. And Obama and his staff will take turns playing with Media, when they need a break from the stress of their duties, playing fetch and throwing him bones. I wonder what Media will get for Christmas?

Dear Creative Comrade Maksim,

Congratulations! I believe Media is headed for syndication! Well done!

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Congratulations, Maksim! For the umpteenth time since its inception, you have been awarded Pinkie's prestigious Beet of the Week Award!

Image Your mom should be receiving her new "My Child is Beet of the Week at The People's Cube.com" bumper sticker (that she can put over the old one) in approximately 6-8 weeks.

You also get a Bottle of Hope (Hope not included, must be purchased separately), and a non-transferable gift certificate to Pup's Pleasure Palace; but be advised he may be filing for bankruptcy shortly, because of the tanking economy and the costs he's racking up for his upcoming show trial. Should that be the case--unless he can get a government bailout--you may find the gift certificate won't be honored and you'll be stiffed--well, maybe you will be at that, but let's pick another phrase anyway--you'll be on the hook for the bill. Pinkie's Beet of the Week International Ltd and its subsidiaries is in no way responsible for any problems that ensue. You are likewise responsible for paying all taxes on your award. Taxes will be paid in money order only made out to Commissarka Pinkie Obama. Failure to do the patriotic thing by paying taxes may result in a denunciation/show trial/purge at your expense.
__________________________<br>Get more from your government! Visit http://www.change.gov to learn more about The One's exciting plans for community service and public works projects, and how you can become part of history sooner than you ever dreamed!

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Comrade Commissarka Pinkie,

I've been thinking on potential public works and since I really really like the Hoover Dam, do you think you could talk to O-Hubbie, and see about building another one... Or maybe... I dunno... another Panama Canal.. no... no I don't like that idea... maybe something along the Mississippi somewhere... I mean, lake Ponchatrain is pretty cool, and lakes are nice, right?... I think there could be another lake in the general vicinity... or a bunch of new levies... a New New Orleans... There could be New Orleans and New New Orleans... I think this make perfect sense...

... but whatever... I'd really love another Hoover Dam cause the first one is really neat...

Thanks
SMO


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Very nice, Maksim, very nice.

Do you think that you could train the lapdog to agitate for me? Sister wants another Hoover Dam. I saw it four months ago and it's wonderful. But I want one in the West Texas Desert. There's no water here, of course, so we'll have to provide that, but I'm worth it because I'm entitled.

In fact, I'm so entitled that I don't think that I should ever have to watch what I eat. Let's get his O'liness to work on that one too.

And do you think that I should take out a mortgage on my house so I won't have to pay it?

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Thanks everyone. Receiving the Beet of the Week award is always an ego stroke humbling, but the Bottle of Hope is more than I deserve, however I will accept it, for The Children™ of course. I better stop before I begin to channel Sally Field again.

Image Because of a prolonged election hangover/depression, I haven't been diligent in keeping Cube current, so I've missed a few things, like the Bottle of Hope. I find this and other items (such as the Obama train set) simultaneously hilarious and disturbing. Are large numbers of people actually buying this crap? I'm a massive Reagan fan and other than a few books the only object I own honoring him is an unopened bottle of Ronald Reagan beer (from a local brewery 80's era) which I received as a gift. I'm perplexed.

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Congratulations on the appointment of the Obamessiah's lapdog...err... I mean devoted canine companion. I do wonder what the Marshal would say about the retraining of all dogs to become lapdogs though. There are other progressive duties that dogs perform besides licking butts and playing softball. I'm sure the Pup will insist that this "Fairness Dog Train" should be directly connected to the gravy train! LOL

hoping Media gets the choice assignmentsbones!

Che' Gourmet

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During the terms of the Esteemed Bill Clinton there were some female media lapdogs who openly said they'd like the presidential bone.

But Gennifer Flowers said in her <i>Penthouse</i> interview, "Bill Clinton has a small penis and his wife has fat ankles and they'll just have to get over each others' imperfections."

Are we now going to compare the size of bones thrown to the media?

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Commissar Maksim wrote:Thanks everyone. Receiving the Beet of the Week award is always an ego stroke humbling, but the Bottle of Hope is more than I deserve, however I will accept it, for The Children™ of course. I better stop before I begin to channel Sally Field again.

Image Because of a prolonged election hangover/depression, I haven't been diligent in keeping Cube current, so I've missed a few things, like the Bottle of Hope. I find this and other items (such as the Obama train set) simultaneously hilarious and disturbing. Are large numbers of people actually buying this crap? I'm a massive Reagan fan and other than a few books the only object I own honoring him is an unopened bottle of Ronald Reagan beer (from a local brewery 80's era) which I received as a gift. I'm perplexed.

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Maksim, you are perplexed because this is unprecedented for a U.S. President. I've lived under nine of them and remember nothing like this. If they did this for every President, it would be normal. In England they do it for all milestones (except death) for all members of the royal family, not just the Queen, so IMVHO, that's normal for them. (And BTW, romantic soul that I am, I do own a few collectibles related to royal weddings, but got them in England, never seen them for sale in the U.S.) Princess Diana's death was a deviation from the norm; they sold collectibles commemorating her death right here in the U.S., but I've never seen any collectibles "commemorating" the deaths of the Queen Mother (who lived past 100) or Princess Margaret, who have both died since Diana.

Otherwise, this is in the same class as all the Elvis memorabilia (a testament to Obama's "substance") which I don't see so much of anymore, perhaps because (a) the generation that worships him is my mother's generation, which is slowly starting to pass away, and (b) to some extent I think he was supplanted by Diana's death. It's been over 10 years since then, and they're ready for something new to make an easy buck, hence the avalanche of tacky Obama stuff.

As to whether people actually buy this crap, that's a good question considering the people they're marketing to are the same people who've been told for the past year that they're hurting because of the economy and job losses, that they're having to choose between gas and meds, that they have to go to food pantries now and rely on charities to give their kids Christmas toys, and it's not their fault they bought homes and cars they couldn't afford.

But even if no one is buying, the fact remains these entrepreneurs are putting this stuff out there, selling an idea, an illusion, as part of a greater attempt to manufacture the cult of personality needed to lead the stupid and weak down the path to benevolent dictatorship.

Those of us here are already smart enough to see that, and that's a start, a big leap in the right direction. Now we just need to beef ourselves up for the strength to fight it.

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[off]Pinkie, you're right; it is a cult of personality and there's no question about it.

The entire culture of entitlement and self-esteem is meant to make people servile to the people who pass out the rewards which are unlinked from the actions of the people who get them.

Slavery is bad not because the word is in bad odor but because slavery means the loss of agency. When actions have consequences people are in charge of themselves. Bad behavior rewarded with forgiveness--using babies as a welfare check for example--means people are dependent on others.

Slavery by other means.

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Commissar Maksim,

Kudos on Episode I of Media. I look forward to Episode II.

Commissarka Pinkie O was right on with;"Those of us here are already smart enough to see that, and that's a start, a big leap in the right direction. Now we just need to beef ourselves up for the strength to fight it."

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Comrades,

As an innocent babe raised by reactionaries and not by the omniscient compassionate State, I bear scars in many forms, one of which is a repertoire of reactionary mnemonic musical indoctrination. Kids' songs, if you like. One in particular was effective in making me falsely associate a price to objects that are and must be free. It went something like this:

"How much is that doggy in the window?
The one with the waggily tail?"

In the context of this thread, I am fighting my reactionary demons, comrades.

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Perhaps that was why his O'liness deliberately turned off all the fraud protection in the credit-card giving. Because it's the thought that counts, not matching the name with the number.

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Slavery by other means.

I still find it stunningly ironic that the first African American president stands poised to place slave shackles on more people than even Simon LeGree's imagination could conjure.

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Isn't Laika the Peoples Dog? As such, wouldn't Laika be the First Dog?

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Comrade_Elliott wrote:Isn't Laika the Peoples Dog? As such, wouldn't Laika be the First Dog?

Comrade Elliott,

A very good point, but as The One's children will not attend attend the People's Schools, I suspect The One will also pass on the People's Dog but not the People's Money.

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Laika's too busy being dead... I mean, um... broadcasting important signals to the moonbats.

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Then again, maybe The One could negotiate, without preconditions, the sharing of Iranian President Ahmadinejad's canine, "Atomic Dog." If it glows at night, the Obama children won't need nightlights, which will save energy costs and the environment. It's a win-win!

As the video below indicates, the "Atomic Dog" comes with new and improved '80s booty! With a couple of quarters, it can rock your world even without a uranium-enriching-spinning-thingy.

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="https://www.youtube.com/v/LuyS9M8T03A&h ... ram><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

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Betinov wrote:I still find it stunningly ironic that the first African American president stands poised to place slave shackles on more people than even Simon LeGree's imagination could conjure.
Ah, Brain in a Jar, that's how Jesse Jackson got his money, telling people that they were helpless without him, and then he sneered at his O'liness, "He ain't run anything but his mouth." And other things.

I live on the border and the people meanest to the Mexicans are...the Mexicans. It is not a racial fault but the desire of the con man to use any connection possible.

What I find most interesting is the Progressives and near-Progressives who have decided that this is a way to feel good and to seem to be doing good without the trouble of looking at things.

Ah. Such a labor-saving device.

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This is the funniest (and saddest) cartoon I've seen in years! Even my dog laughed.

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Life imitates art. At the top of this page was the banner
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It also says that his O'liness' IQ is 125, which just ain't so. Either he's a puppet and dumb as a bag of hammers not to know about Rezko and the others, or he's smarter than that and in it up to his well-manicured elbows.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:Life imitates art. At the top of this page was the banner
Image
It also says that his O'liness' IQ is 125, which just ain't so. Either he's a puppet and dumb as a bag of hammers not to know about Rezko and the others, or he's smarter than that and in it up to his well-manicured elbows.


I wonder if this gig works from jail cells; maybe Rezko and Blago could work it.

Supposedly Einstein had an (estimated) IQ of 207; that's why he stayed out of Chicago and let Fermi build the atomic pile there instead. Obama is not Lincoln, he's Einstein!

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Opiate of the People wrote:I wonder if this gig works from jail cells; maybe Rezko and Blago could work it.

Comrade Opiate of the People,

I think Chicago itself, as a collective whole, is a jail cell of sorts, especially in those "community organized" areas. But I have never been to Springfield, IL. Perhaps I would see no difference. I expect everyone in state government in Springfield is from Chicago or moves there.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:
Betinov wrote:I still find it stunningly ironic that the first African American president stands poised to place slave shackles on more people than even Simon LeGree's imagination could conjure.
Ah, Brain in a Jar, that's how Jesse Jackson got his money, telling people that they were helpless without him, and then he sneered at his O'liness, "He ain't run anything but his mouth." And other things.

I live on the border and the people meanest to the Mexicans are...the Mexicans. It is not a racial fault but the desire of the con man to use any connection possible.

What I find most interesting is the Progressives and near-Progressives who have decided that this is a way to feel good and to seem to be doing good without the trouble of looking at things.

Ah. Such a labor-saving device.

The best way to keep the voters for the democrats is to keep races divided amongst themselves, even if it's the same people of a race against each other.

A good friend of mine once said "The worst thing the white man ever did for the black man was not slavery, but welfare."

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Comrade_Tovarich wrote:
Opiate of the People wrote:I wonder if this gig works from jail cells; maybe Rezko and Blago could work it.

Comrade Opiate of the People,

I think Chicago itself, as a collective whole, is a jail cell of sorts, especially in those "community organized" areas. But I have never been to Springfield, IL. Perhaps I would see no difference. I expect everyone in state government in Springfield is from Chicago or moves there.


Yes, perhaps you are on to something, comrade! I recall an old movie where Manhattan Island (or "Personhattan" to use a more gender-neutral term) had been turned into one large prison largely run by the inmates. Perhaps that is the patriotic progressive future of Chicago... the world's first combination giant collective and penitentiary. Thank (someone) that Obama escaped with his incorruptibility in tact. Now, round up the proles, let us start digging the moat around the city before any more of the natives escape...

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Comrade Opiate,

Many years ago I had the privilege to be driven past the Cook County Jail. For me, it is most notable for the visible bullet holes (well, marks) on its exterior, which my host pointed out. I think that says quite a lot about the county seat, Chicago.

I will visit Chicago, but hell if I'd ever live there. Better to dig coal in WV or KY. Not only is it safer and healthier, it's more heroic. Er, was, until Green became the new Red.

Chavez Enlargement!

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Also, you guys need to use the approved terms, it's no longer the fairness doctrine. It's now called balancing media ownership and stopping hate radio. Please keep updated on the progressive newspeak!

I hope the media lapdog was not actually digging its own grave. It did such an amazing job putting even Pravda or the eastern block media in the days of yore to shame.

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Comrade_Elliott wrote:
A good friend of mine once said "The worst thing the white man ever did for the black man was not slavery, but welfare."

Slavery and welfare are totally and utterly unrelated, comrade. Yep. Unrelated. Slavery is when the state reinforces the absolute physical control of one man over another; welfare is when the state reinforces the absolute economic control of one man over another. These are different things. Learn to see four fingers, comrade.

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This is a little treaty weaty for Media. Enjoy!

Image

Sit! Rollover! Beg! Play DEAD! good bitch.

I am being new here and have returned from gulag after many years, I have question, what is Obama? Is good for party? I go to gulag for not being party. Camp gulag counselors tell me I am now good for party. I have shovel. I only want potato or beet, and I will shovel many times.

What is media lap dog? Is obama man? Is good place here? I have strong shovel and strong back.

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Gulag Man wrote:I am being new here and have returned from gulag after many years, I have question, what is Obama? Is good for party? I go to gulag for not being party. Camp gulag counselors tell me I am now good for party. I have shovel. I only want potato or beet, and I will shovel many times.

What is media lap dog? Is obama man? Is good place here? I have strong shovel and strong back.

What you need, comrade, is a little of this...
<br>Image
Rub a little between your teeth and gums and wait for that frosty mug sensation!

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Whoops! It appears Media has crapped on Rahm's front lawn!

Emanuel: I'm Getting Death Threats Over Blagojevich Scandal
Obama's Chief of Staff Delayed Going to Work Because of Media Stakeout

https://preview.tinyurl.com/6q8mop

Back at his home, Emanuel appeared "beet-red," according to an ABC News cameraman who was invited inside by Emanuel to use his bathroom this morning.

"I'm getting regular death threats. You've put my home address on national television. I'm pissed at the networks. You've intruded too much, " Emanuel said, according to the cameraman.

Media! BAD DOG!

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AbecedariusRex wrote:
Comrade_Elliott wrote:
A good friend of mine once said "The worst thing the white man ever did for the black man was not slavery, but welfare."

Slavery and welfare are totally and utterly unrelated, comrade. Yep. Unrelated. Slavery is when the state reinforces the absolute physical control of one man over another; welfare is when the state reinforces the absolute economic control of one man over another. These are different things. Learn to see four fingers, comrade.

(off)
Oops, I forgot the (off) before I started, but I know you know what I mean.

AbecedariusRex wrote:
Gulag Man wrote:I am being new here and have returned from gulag after many years, I have question, what is Obama? Is good for party? I go to gulag for not being party. Camp gulag counselors tell me I am now good for party. I have shovel. I only want potato or beet, and I will shovel many times.

What is media lap dog? Is obama man? Is good place here? I have strong shovel and strong back.

What you need, comrade, is a little of this...
<br>Image
Rub a little between your teeth and gums and wait for that frosty mug sensation!

I see now. So no more shoveling? Free potato and beet? In gulag we work and shovel for potato or beet. How I get free potato or beet? Who bring to me?

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KomradeMarine wrote:The People approve!
Semper Fi. Of course we do. It's that or off to the Gulag.

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Truly comrades, this is a glorious comic done in praise of our progressive people's allies in the propaganda- I mean, 'news media' corporations. Let us thank them for their part in creating the coming socialist utopia, before the people decide to 'thank' us far more... vigorously.

[Off]
Man, dead on, dude! Nailed it right on the head.

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Comrade_Tovarich wrote:Then again, maybe The One could negotiate, without preconditions, the sharing of Iranian President Ahmadinejad's canine, "Atomic Dog." If it glows at night, the Obama children won't need nightlights, which will save energy costs and the environment. It's a win-win!

As the video below indicates, the "Atomic Dog" comes with new and improved '80s booty! With a couple of quarters, it can rock your world even without a uranium-enriching-spinning-thingy.

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="https://www.youtube.com/v/LuyS9M8T03A&h ... ram><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

It was terrible to see so many people suffering from psoriasis and no way to itch. With all that energy we should hand them shovels they can dig to your part of the world Comrade T.

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Gulag Man wrote:I am being new here and have returned from gulag after many years, I have question, what is Obama? Is good for party? I go to gulag for not being party. Camp gulag counselors tell me I am now good for party. I have shovel. I only want potato or beet, and I will shovel many times.

What is media lap dog? Is obama man? Is good place here? I have strong shovel and strong back.
Da! That is good, but do you also have strong stomach for what comes next. After Pipples bail out Capitalist venture mongers Ford, Chrysler, and GM there will be Bail Out of Drive In Theaters and going out of business Capitalist Pig Merchants.
You thought Woolworths was gone.

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AbecedariusRex wrote:This is a little treaty weaty for Media. Enjoy!

Image

Sit! Rollover! Beg! Play DEAD! good bitch.

Comrade AbecedariusRex,

Nice to see you again, comrade.

Just found this: looks like VP-Elect Biden beat the Obamessiah to the punch on this:

Biden beats Obama in puppy race
Posted: 05:09 PM ET
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Vice President-elect Joe Biden is getting this German Shepherd puppy when he moves to Washington in January.

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(CNN) – While the country is fixated on what kind of dog President-elect Barack Obama's family will get when they move into the White House, his Vice President-elect Joe Biden quietly picked out a puppy of his own last week.
Biden's wife, Jill, promised the future VP a dog if he and Obama got elected. Biden found the as-yet-unnamed pup, a three-month old male German Shepherd, in a breeder's kennel in southeastern Pennsylvania, the area's Daily Local News reports.
Biden revealed his wife's pledge on Election Day, telling reporters flying with him to Chicago that she had first promised him a dog if he was elected president, and when his primary bid failed, if he was elected vice president. Mrs. Biden even taped pictures of dogs on the seatback in front of Biden on the plane, according to the report.

Got to admit it, the future VP has good taste in dogs! His wife said that he was going to let his grandchildren name the pup when he arrives in January.

fixing some treats for Media & Laika,
Che' Gourmet

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Che, when when you fix the treats please be sure to make them of the birds that Pupovich trained to do the talent shitting at Rancho de Rio Grande.

After all, nastiness will be in the very meat which will add to the sapor of the treats for Media and the Biden Dog. The four-legged Biden Dog.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:Che, when when you fix the treats please be sure to make them of the birds that Pupovich trained to do the talent shitting at Rancho de Rio Grande.

After all, nastiness will be in the very meat which will add to the sapor of the treats for Media and the Biden Dog. The four-legged Biden Dog.

Theocritus, how does that contest work, exactly?

On another note, I can't wait for some elected official to adopt an edible beast for their White House mascot: goat or chicken, maybe Chihuahua or cow. That would be cool; the presidential cow. Ah, good times!

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As usual, I am late for the party..... just wanted to add a big ole bolshevik KUDOS to Commissar Maksim! and the creative collective that have brought to the Proletariat this marvelous "based-on-true-life" saga.

However, perhaps if the storyline will allow, in a future episode Media should have a vat of toxic chemicals spilled on it and the looks of the character could be changed.... the following link should provide some inspiration for a more appropriate re-drawing of the heinous creature called "Media"

http://www.sonoma-marinfair.org/uglydogvote08.shtml

I'm thinking the lapdog-hellhound "Media" should look more like this......

Image

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ABCDariusRex wrote:That would be cool; the presidential cow.
Dear Doctor. Have you forgotten Our Many Titted Empress?

Also, talent shitting is something coined by Dear Marshall Pupovich and <a href="https://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopi ... 6#49826">I denounced him</a>.

I personally think that talent shitting ought to be expanded. For example, Media the Lapdog has spent eight years talent shitting on the execrable Bu$hitler. Michael Moore is very good at talent shitting on truth. Dan Rather is in effect good at talent shitting on reality but that is not by design but by talent. Which is almost tautological, isn't it?

Perhaps there ought to be two sorts of talent shitting: talent shitting which is entirely by talent, such as Dan Rather and perhaps Frank Rich, and talent shitting which is the result of great effort, like Al Franken. But in the later case how can one tell the dancer from the dance?

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Commissar Theocritus wrote: But in the later case how can one tell the dancer from the dance?

AHOY! A Yeats reference! A Yeats reference!

In our case you can tell the dancer from the dance b/c dancer is wearing glasses while he dances.

Hey ass faces

Next time one of my ideas is about to be unleashed. Drop me a fuck**g email first, not a credit ............

BTW I have diarrhea, heart burn, and indigestion


on the other hand

I really like the cartoons, trash from my mind ending up in cyberspace

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Comrade General Secretary,

I just want you to know that I wanted you to have top billing on this. I wanted you to have your name in big red glowing, blinking letters above and below the title, and also credit you as Executive Producer. And as for the e-mail, we don't have your e-mail, O Great and Terribly Wonderful, Wondrous General Secretary, so I suggested that we send you a personal massage--I mean messenger--in the very shapely form of the current Playmate of the Month to inform you that the comic was about to be unleashed, but they all said no, instead THEY wanted the POTM for themselves and they said you could bloody well (their words, not mine) have this:

Image
Then I said, "Well, at the very least, let me award the General Secretary with Beet of the Week," and that's when they made me an offer I couldn't refuse. They said I had to give it to Maksim or I'd wake up to find a horse's ass in my bed. To which I replied, "So what? I wake up next to those all the time. They line up outside my hovel every Friday night."

So what's one more? Therefore I will give you this:
Image Plus you'll get the Bottle of Hope, the bumpersticker, and the coupons to Pup's Pleasure Palace; but as for the parking space, Pupovich still has his vehicle there and you may have to tow it at your own expense if you wish to use the space during your reign as Beet of the Week.

Anything else we can do to appease you, General Secretary? How about some Pinkie pink Pepto-Bismol?

Get better soon.

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General Secretary wrote:blah blah blah profanity
Next time one of my ideas is about to be unleashed. Drop me a profanity email first, not a credit ............

BTW I have profanity, profanity, and profanity


on the other hand

I really like the cartoons, trash from my mind ending up in cyberspace

What on earth? Here I thought this string was about MEDIA the lapdog. How did a trollish attitude get through the door?

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Oh, and by the way, General Secretary, shall I take my shovel and whack Abecedarius Rex into dinoguts, or would you rather vaporize him with the laser beams from your most excellent eyes?

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Commissarka Pinkie wrote:Oh, and by the way, General Secretary, shall I take my shovel and whack Abecedarius Rex into dinoguts, or would you rather vaporize him with the laser beams from your most excellent eyes?

NOT IN THE FACE!
Image

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Sorry Gen. Sec.
If I change my avatar to the image below, will all be forgiven?
Image

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For a lap dog he's gonna require an awfully big pooper-scooper.

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AbecedariusRex wrote:
Commissarka Pinkie wrote:Oh, and by the way, General Secretary, shall I take my shovel and whack Abecedarius Rex into dinoguts, or would you rather vaporize him with the laser beams from your most excellent eyes?

NOT IN THE FACE!
Image

Not to worry, Rex--it's not your face where he'll be aiming.

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Commissar Maksim wrote:Sorry Gen. Sec.
If I change my avatar to the image below, will all be forgiven?
Image

Why, Maksim! That looks just like someone we know!
Image

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fixing some treats for Media & Laika,
Che' Gourmet
Medium Filet Mignon for Media.
I like mine with a little "Moo" left in it.
Caspian caviar of course, as an appetizer.
The Pig(abuser) has sniffed out a few truffles too.

Damn cataracts...Is that a Doublemime Chewing Gum advertisement I see above this post?

Looks like one has his mouthful.

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Laika the Space Dog wrote:
fixing some treats for Media & Laika,
Che' Gourmet
Medium Filet Mignon for Media.
I like mine with a little "Moo" left in it.
Caspian caviar of course, as an appetizer.
The Pig(abuser) has sniffed out a few truffles too.

Damn cataracts...Is that a Doublemime Chewing Gum advertisement I see above this post?

Looks like one has his mouthful.

To Hero Space Dog, Laika,

I'm on it, although I'm not sure about the Caspian caviar. Putin has a lock on that, but I'll scrounge around for some Beluga, if that is acceptable? BTW My truffle sauce is to die for!
Boy do I miss Wolfgang......where the hell did I put that caviar???? Ahh...there it is...Image
Russian Beluga

Che' Gourmet

PS Don't tell anyone about this. You can only sell beluga caviar in California,... (legally). Like I care about regulations...HA!HA!

PSS Commissar Theocritis - I haven't forgotten about the pigeons, I'm working on that.

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Che Gourmet wrote:
Laika the Space Dog wrote:
Doodly doodly doodle
Kachung Kachung Kachung

To Hero Space Dog, Laika,

I'm on it, although I'm not sure about the Caspian caviar. Putin has a lock on that, but I'll scrounge around for some Beluga, if that is acceptable? BTW My truffle sauce is to die for!
Boy do I miss Wolfgang......where the hell did I put that caviar???? Ahh...there it is...Image
Russian Beluga

PSS Commissar Theocritis - I haven't forgotten about the pigeons, I'm working on that.

Could I please have my helping of fish eggs without so much pigeon shit in it? Thanks a bunch.

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Rex, that's not pigeon shit. That's grackle shit. Pigeons bill and coo. Grackles sound like jackhammers fucking, which is why Pupovich trained them to bomb my Rancho.

And yes, Pinkie, ass face does look like ass face. Which one came first? Both emit noxious fumes.

And, General Secretary, once you are through at the Pup's Pleasure Palace, I invite you over to Rancho de Rio Grande. I have a special room just for you. I built it to accommodate Our Many Titted Empress and her coterie of hangers-on, sycophants and latex sex toys. Which are pretty much indistinguishable one from the other.

And so you will have the honor of the full presence of Our Many Titted Empress, I have not sluiced it down.

This is of course to recompense you for something which may or may not have been stolen which you may or may not have had anything to do with.

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AbecedariusRex wrote:This is a little treaty weaty for Media. Enjoy!

Image

Sit! Rollover! Beg! Play DEAD! good bitch.

Is this another scheme enterprise being run by Comrade Jackson? Do they come in chocolate?

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<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chef's_Ch ... ls">Chef's Salty Chocolate Balls?</a>?

And by the way, Che, I've never had Beluga but at the Driskill Grill in Austin I did have Sevruga. Why spoil it with eggs and capers and onion? It stands on its own. But I only did this in research. It is evil to deprive a fish of its eggs. After all, Astrid Lindgren, the author of Pippi Longstocking, said that all animals have the right to choose their own mates. We should not eat the fish eggs. We should give the fish knitting needles.

Someone say I get free potato from obama man, no more shoveling. What is talent shitting, is funny thing? What is caviar, is frog egg? Maybe I think gulag not so bad place. I shovel many times and at end of day I get potato maybe beet or carrot. Will obama man give me beet or potato without much shoveling? Maybe is best for free potato.

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And, Gulag Man, if you don't shovel with a smile on your face, glad to do your all for the people (remember Boxer in <i>Animal Farm</i>), you'll get the same fate as Boxer in <i>Animal Farm</i>. Except that we don't use the knackers. We use proles for medical experiments.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:And, Gulag Man, if you don't shovel with a smile on your face, glad to do your all for the people (remember Boxer in <i>Animal Farm</i>), you'll get the same fate as Boxer in <i>Animal Farm</i>. Except that we don't use the knackers. We use proles for medical experiments.

...and chocolate salty munchy balls!

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Rex, I have a sideline in my JiffyLobo(tomy). Since the prole who sacrifices his prefrontal lobes for the Common Good™ will also be unable to control his base instincts, we do not want him doing indiscriminate breeding. For if he's at JiffyLobo, he has genes that we do not want propagated.

Therefore making what the Arabs call a "clean eunuch" is in order.

The scrota, tanned, will be sold as change purses. And the Wee Willie Winkie sitting on top will be donated to Che Gourmet to make into forcemeat to stuff hummingbirds.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:And the Wee Willie Winkie sitting on top will be donated to Che Gourmet to make into forcemeat to stuff hummingbirds.

Or, the Wee Willie Winkie could be tanned and made into an Obama finger puppet.

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From the Office of Marshal Pupovich

Comrades, a few thoughts if you will.

First, that was a wonderful work Comrade Maksim did for the Party as I know we all agree, and his earning the Beet of the Week and Bottle of Hope well deserved. As for the free pass to the Pup's Pleasure Party House, I had passed that responsibility on to Commissar.... er.... Commissar....let me think, any hoo, it was after I was moved to Marshal. Now it appears I may have to reclaim this.

Comrades, I must say this about the Media dog, be careful. Yes, I know the Media dog looks wonderful now, and as you know, I am a dog's best friend. I am a bit surprised however that the Obama chose a dog instead of a cat. After all, a cat is more representative of one with no original thought, all fluff and stuff, a duplicitous creature beyond compare. So my gut instinct, which is never wrong, tells me he chose a dog to give his image more gravitas. The Obama is very light in this area and a good dog will help hiere. However, even the Obama best be careful with his dealings with the Media dog breed. While the media dog was bred to serve their progressive masters, even they have been known to bite the hand that fed them if abused or if they see it in their best interest. Think not? Grant it, while not quite as bloodthirsty as they are with a rethuglican in office, the media dogs did have a history of attacking Clinton after he was caught with his pants down, Carter for defending himself from killer rabbits, his failure to rescue the guests of the friendly Iranian govt, and his general failure. Then there was LBJ, oh how did those media dogs ravage him in time. I could go on, but suffice it to say that the media dogs would not have been as brutal on the Bushitler had he not insulted them and the Washington elite by his refusal to play their doggie games with Washington society, not even attempting to meet them halfway by attending all their society requisites.

As for me and my doghouse, Comrade Space Hero Laika will remain #1 Party Dog.

I am sure to have more, but that is enough for now. Carry on Comrades....

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Marshal, you deliberately persist in misunderstanding cats. When a cat doesn't like you it goes away. When a dog doesn't like you it tries to bite you. When a dog likes you it tries to hunch your leg. And it's hell to housebreak. And it stinks.

Estimable Margaret wrote:Or, the Wee Willie Winkie could be tanned and made into an Obama finger puppet.

I'm thinking they might have to be children's fingers. But also I'm planning to do a land-office business in JifiLobo. In fact I'm thinking of instituting a rule that anyone who hasn't had the Beet of the Week award in the last year, excepting of course for a few party apparatchiki, might have to go to JifiLobo.

This means that even His O'liness with even his fast hand work won't have enough fingers for all the puppets.

<i>Pour encourages les autres</i>, of course, <i>pour encourager les autres</i>.

I am hoping for beet of week, I am not liking lobotomy. If you have shoveling to do, I will do, with smile.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:This means that even His O'liness with even his fast hand work won't have enough fingers for all the puppets.

It's funny, at the Halliburton estate Uncle $$ can't bring himself to use bad words in front of children so when little ones are around he just calls Obama "that bastard" instead.

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Margaret, I'm ashamed of you. It's his O'liness's half siblings who are bastards, not His O'liness.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:Margaret, I'm ashamed of you. It's his O'liness's half siblings who are bastards, not His O'liness.

Which ought never to be confused with "his noodly appendage" (even though that has twice the number of O's in it).

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AbecedariusRex wrote:
Commissar Theocritus wrote:And, Gulag Man, if you don't shovel with a smile on your face, glad to do your all for the people (remember Boxer in <i>Animal Farm</i>), you'll get the same fate as Boxer in <i>Animal Farm</i>. Except that we don't use the knackers. We use proles for medical experiments.

...and chocolate salty munchy balls!

...and I hear Comrade Jackson has a new deal right now: A whole sack of chocolate salty munchy balls for only $9.99!

Margaret wrote:
Commissar Theocritus wrote:And the Wee WillieWinkie sitting on top will be donated to Che Gourmet to make intoforcemeat to stuff hummingbirds.

Or, the Wee Willie Winkie could be tanned and made into an Obama finger puppet.

Hors d'oeuvres anyone? Pigs in blankets...

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:Pour encourages les autres, of course, pour encourager les autres.

Oui nous pouvons!

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Dr. Strangelove wrote:
Commissar Theocritus wrote:Pour encourages les autres, of course, pour encourager les autres.

Oui nous pouvons!

I didn't know you guys spoke gibberish.

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AbecedariusRex wrote:
Dr. Strangelove wrote:
Commissar Theocritus wrote:Pour encourages les autres, of course, pour encourager les autres.

Oui nous pouvons!

I didn't know you guys spoke gibberish.

After the selection of His O'liness, The Obamessiah, I immediately began to speak in Tongues.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:Marshal, you deliberately persist in misunderstanding cats. When a cat doesn't like you it goes away.

Oh? Then how do you explain those other catbeasts that hang around outside? Even after months of my determined efforts to run them off. That is their other skill.... talent annoying. No Commissar, it is not like I do not have experience with the cat beast. Perhaps one day I will share the story of how I actually tried to bring one home out of the goodness of my heart, and what happened.


 
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