|With Bush's tax cuts spurring economic growth and prosperity, with the neo-con vision for Middle Eastern freedom gaining momentum, how will The New York Times manage to present these disasters as good news for progressive readers?||We at the People's Cube have developed a technology that emulates the thinking of the NYT headline writers. With just one mouse-click, without paying a dime at the newsstand, you can now generate an instant NYT headline that will brighten your day and ruin it for the capitalist pigs.|
|Whose heads will roll? What headlines will dominate the pages of the progressive media's famed "Battleship Potemkin" in 2006? Surely we'll see more of great headlines like these:|
Copy your favorite headline
Top 10 NYT Headlines in 2006
Just the front - or both front and back
NYT Headline Writer
Cruisin' the yellow seas of journalism on the Battleship Potemkin,
Anonymous NYT Headline Writer
Analysts: School Voucher Program Increases Third World Debt
SUNLIGHT CAUSES GLOBAL WARMING -DAILY!!!!
Chief, Main Organ
You are urged to remember -this most glorious of socialist-utopian inventions -the "NYTime 2006 Headline Predictator" - is to be used as an addition and not as a substitute to the greatest of the glorious socialist-utopian inventions (even greater than the internet!) - none other than the A. Gore "Media's Historical Revision and News-story Concoction Machine" -
Chief, Main Organ of the Great Comintern AgitProp Directorate
"The Order of the Walter Duranty Bourgeois Baffling and Genocide Cover-up Medal"
(this effort can be funded via one of my many tax exempt socialists charity and political-activists' operations financing organizations)
Is that really you? The Cube's Prodigal Son?
My Tail is Wagging and not the Space Dog!
Oh wait, I really wrote that one!
New Study Proves Fox News can cause Impotence, Americans Asked to Watch More CNN.
No Child Left Behind Increases High School Graduations, Labor Unions Outraged.
Evolution Proven True, Missing Link Found in Clinton Family Tree.
Indeed so! People's Cube, you just brightened up my day! :-D
BTW - why does this picture in the header say "куб народов"? It's like "cube of peoples" or something. IMO it should say "народный куб"
Dear Comrade Alexei -
Indeed, the literal translation would be "народный куб" but since "people's" in the English language modifies many nouns that, taken together as an idiom, can't translate in a literal way, we decided that we should go with a non-literal translation that would sound grandiose enough to reflect its true meaning. The closest approximation would be "куб народной демократии" but that may be too long. In German the precedent was "Volkswagen," hence "Volkswuerfel." In the Mother Tongue, there was Stalin's "дом народов" - hence "куб народов".
- Red Square
:-D :-D :-D
Finally, the truth is known to the people!
Oh, come on! SO MUCH TRUTH in one day! It's killing me, I can't take it anymore.. :-D :-D
Cubbie the commie
No, not the penguins!
dissident agitator #96
This is simply unfair, so much laughter was produced by this work of the 'people' that milk came out of my PINK nose...
Okay, while on the road today, being driven out of NYC to Princeton, NJ, our car viewed...
1. 'Kerry for President' bumper display cut off an older women and flip her off.
2. 'Friends don't let Friend's Vote Republican' bumper display drive into a toll booth, wrecking both car and booth.
3. 'War is not the Answer' bumper display tailgate some poor man, shooting, hand waving, horn honking, showing massive aggression and road rage.
I hate to stereotype, but I feel I am seeing a trend...
Are these DNC Liberal Nuts just plain upset, or were they nasty, ugly, pathetic to begin with?
Fie and double fie upon you! What you have witnessed are none other than main-organ members of the proletariat vanguard of the Soros and Dhimmicrat (commonly known by their fake name "Democrats") and secret legions who are engaged in the most important of all works - causing division and disorientation among the bourgeois masses.
It may seem that their activities are uncouth, uncivilized, hostile, etc., - but this is because you have obviously been brainwashed by American right-wing extremists (copyright- Peoples and Jihadi Hero of the Revolution - Chuck Schumer) - thought and fail to recognize these as the most talented and highly intelligent progressive revolutionaries leading the way to the true utopia of the 21st century's H.R.Clinton Global Peoples' Village (to begin in 2008).
For you - it's OFF TO RE-EDUCATION CENTER NAMED IN HONOR OF HARRY REID and ROBERT BYRD!!!
Gather 50 kilos of food and belongings and be waiting outside your flat at 0300 for pick up by Black Maria!!!
Failure to report at assigned time will result in your arrest and internal exile!
By order of Chief, North American Progressive Plans and Strategery and Agitation Propaganda and Civil Disobedience Directorate
http://googlefight.com/index.php?lang=e ... s+for+Bush
Surely, this shows the superiority of the Communist ideal over that of the filthy billionaires supporting the fascist pig Bushler! However, I note that the Party, in it's infinite wisdom, misspelled "billionaires" in the Googlefight search, thus skewing the results. The correct link is
http://googlefight.com/index.php?lang=e ... s+for+Bush
Happily, the glorious Communist ideal still triumphs against the real thing, which is of course better than triumphing over a clerical error.
Am I wrong about this?
Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals: Eating Red Meat Linked to Domestic Violence
International Observers: Iraqi Occupation Breeds More Terrorists
Nobel Laureate: Rush Limbaugh Bad For Self Esteem
Hey guys, the headline generator is the funniest thing I've seen in a long time!
The Dick List
Comrade Kraven Buttholz
Increases In US Life Expectancy Means Fewer Resources for Africa
Damn....the thing REALLY does work.
Viagra Prescriptions Soar
Now also behold "Automatic Bob" - the NY Times' Bob Herbert column generator (at http://www.BrainTerminal.com ):
... many of Herbert's columns during the Bush presidency contain similar, interchangeable passages ... that make it seem like your average Herbert column is just a random recombination of wording from earlier columns.
Given the paper's recent stock performance and rumblings from restless investors, I thought I'd help the Times find ways to put out the same product for less money. So I spent about fifteen minutes writing software that can generate Bob Herbert columns while using a minimal amount of our Earth's precious resources.
http://brain-terminal.com/posts/2006/05 ... ob-herbert
Muslim Women: Christmas Tree Must Be Stopped
Bush Critics: Celebrating Christmas Causes Birth Defects In Spotted Owls
CIA Whistleblower: US Constitution leads to decrease in Penguin Population, or something like that. Couldn't cut & paste.
Lysander Spooner, 1867, Part I
The question of treason is distinct from that of slavery; and is the same that it would have been, if free States, instead of slave States, had seceded. ...
What was true of our ancestors, is true of revolutionists in general. The monarchs and governments, from whom they choose to separate, attempt to stigmatize them as traitors. But they are not traitors in fact; in-much they betray, and break faith with, no one. Having pledged no faith, they break none. They are simply men, who, for reasons of their own --- whether good or bad, wise or unwise, is immaterial --- choose to exercise their natural right of dissolving their connexion with the governments under which they have lived. In doing this, they no more commit the crime of treason --- which necessarily implies treachery, deceit, breach of faith --- than a man commits treason when he chooses to leave a church, or any other voluntary association, with which he has been connected.
This principle was a true one in 1776. It is a true one now. It is the only one on which any rightful government can rest. It is the one on which the Constitution itself professes to rest. If it does not really rest on that basis, it has no right to exist; and it is the duty of every man to raise his hand against it.
If the men of the Revolution designed to incorporate in the Constitution the absurd ideas of allegiance and treason, which they had once repudiated, against which they had fought, and by which the world had been enslaved, they thereby established for themselves an indisputable claim to the disgust and detestation of all mankind.
In subsequent numbers, the author hopes to show that, under the principle of individual consent, the little government that mankind need, is not only practicable, but natural and easy; and that the Constitution of the United States authorizes no government, except one depending wholly on voluntary support.
For the remaining parts, check out lysanderspooner.com
Wow...you got all that from the NYT Headline generator?
The enlightening headline I got:
Nancy Pelosi: Christmas Tree Connected to Global Warming
I thought as much. I knew there was a reason I liked Kwanzaa better than Xmas, although Ho-Ho-Ho wears the right color.
EDIT: Did I say "obtain to"? Drat. That's what happens with a state-sponsored edumacation.
I thought this thread should be rehabilitated.