As you, my fellow Comrades, may have heard, Comrade Rod Blagojevich is forced to fend himself against a Capitalist Inquisition into his dealings when occupying the former post of Vozhd' of the People of Illinois.

I for one feel that the approach that Comrade Blagojevich's defense team has taken is not the correct one. Since, by his own words, Blagoyevich did "nothing wrong" and is a part of the "lie of the century", the best tactic in this situation would be to bring his case directly to the people. Of course we must not forget Comrade's attempts at doing so by appearing on such People's favorites as "Celebrity Apprentice" and "Wendy Williams Show", but there is more that can be done. If we examine Blagojevich's actions, we will find that he was following the laws set fourth by our Communist Forefathers.
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Just today, a former aid to Comrade Blago testified that the former Vozhd' wasn't going to sign a certain legislation until a racetrack owner John Johnston made good on a promise for a $100,000 campaign contribution. I see nothing wrong in taking promised fiscal intakes from such Capitalist conspirators as John Johnson who owes that ten times fold for the damage his capitalist cabal has brought upon the people of Illinois. Furthermore, the Capitalist criminal Johnson must answer before a court of inquiry as to why he dared to withhold promised Party contributions!!!

As far as the allegations that our fellow Comrade tried to sell our Dear Leader's seat for cash, let me interject. Comrade Blago said time and time again that the money was meant for the funding of different community causes and creating jobs. This situation was forced onto Comrade Blago by the fact that he, just like his people are prisoners of the Capitalist beast, which does not allow "entitled progress".

Once again I must remind you, my fellow Comrades that these Capitalist atrocities will go on, until our Dear Leader is given the chance to instate a proper rate of Progress so that to reform this preposterous Capitalist system.

As Chapter 1 of the Communist Manifesto wisely states:

"The various interests and conditions of life within the ranks of the proletariat
are more and more equalized, in proportion as machinery obliterates all distinctions
of labor, and nearly everywhere reduces wages to the same low level."

So, as you can see by the words of Dedushka Marx, the only way we can make all equal is
by the elimination of Capitalism (i.e. all money). And the only way we can do that is by making more machinery. So i call for a new legislation increasing our current robot productions!

I am happy to report that our current robot production factories are fully operational, fulfilling 120% of the state-mandated quotas!

Dear Comrade Red Square

This is great news! I will sleep better tonight cuddling my Vladidmir Ilytch Bear. However, since the recent escalations in the Gulf, more robots will be needed in order to properly regulate the Capitalist crime syndicate going by the acronym BP. Therefor the state mandated quota has been doubled. I respectfully request that you inform the appropriate GORISPOLKOM and RAYISPOLKOM leaders so that they can inform the according local proletariat and Profsoyuz leaders.

In view of the doubled quotas on robots, old capitalist production lines are being feverishly refurbished to bring the produkt in compliance with the latest guidelines.


Our selfless udarniki have promised to complete the plan ahead of schedule.

excellent! Comrade Red Square, I will be happy to submit a report of praise to the Board of Mechanical Progress to Further Communist Theory and recommend you for the ordyn of Lenin. However, once again in the words of Marx: "The production of too many useful things results in too many useless people." So let us not create useless people by excessive robotic overproduction.

Marxspeed!