Nine ways Trump is literally Stalin


Comrade Flake (yes, that is his real name, maybe), says Trump is the new Stalin.
Jeff Flake Compares Trump to Joseph Stalin
The similarities are glorious:
1. Just like Trump, Stalin is not a real surname, but a revolutionary nom de guerre.
2. Stalin also took advantage of the free market economy to become a billionaire.
3. Stalin ran an international pageant "Miss Gulag" and "Collective Farm Apprentice."
5. Once in power, Stalin freed the capitalist economy of burdensome regulations, reduced the size of government bureaucracy, and cut taxes for individuals and businesses, causing an unprecedented growth of wealth, incomes, and employment.
6. Stalin was relentlessly attacked by the mainstream media, who called him names, disparaged his every move, and questioned his sanity. The Tsarist Deep State obstructed his policies at every turn.
7. Stalin was subjected to a special investigation by the Mensheviks over allegations that he colluded with the Russians to defeat the presidential candidate Hillary Rodham Trotsky, whom he later killed with an ice axe. The alleged plan to win the presidency included an occult ritual, in which hired prostitutes performed a ceremonial "golden shower" on the bed where the deposed Tsar had slept with his First Tsarina.
8. Stalin's only recourse against the attacks was to ridicule his opponents on Twitter.
9. Everything points to the fact that, just like Stalin, Trump will rule the country for 30 years and die in his bed at the peak of his personality cult, poisoned by Jewish doctors.
We can see, comrades, that Trump is literally Stalin.
While many will dismiss this statement as insane and unstable, I see this as an opportunity to spread the word to fellow travelers. Let this be our new rallying cry, which may allow us to run a real Stalin-like candidate from the Democrat side and thus cement our power over this unlawful country with its shameless capitalist wealth for good.
Always!
In Great Socialist Unity!
Your most humble Liquidator™,
Dimitri Kissov


YESTERDAY:
TODAY:













Papa Kalashnikook
Glorious Komrades! I propose a new Award for news coverage of some infinitesimally unimportant Trump OUTRAGE! I call the award the WAAA! The Wrapped Around the Axle Award. Thoughts?
Only one thought. That's not an axle. It's a drive shaft.






Mikhail Lysenkomann
Papa Kalashnikook
Glorious Komrades! I propose a new Award for news coverage of some infinitesimally unimportant Trump OUTRAGE! I call the award the WAAA! The Wrapped Around the Axle Award. Thoughts?
Only one thought. That's not an axle. It's a drive shaft.
The People's Tractor Factory knows it as a "power take off".




Red Square
The lead story ... updated with bullet points: Nine ways Trump is literally Stalin.10. Trichomanic isomorphism: both Trump and Stalin obsessed about hair.
Even an idiot knows: Trump = overcomb. And every sophisticate (postgraduates in African Transgendered Basket Weaving Epistemology first) may literally know nothing about Stalin, __ but this one he/she/it knows: o yeah, Uncle Joe, mustache.
UPD. Komrade Meow - yes! Ultimate proof!


I am awed by your visual agitation. I have had a hard time containing my laughter. This is bad because we Progs are naturally angry. Certainly an Order of The Glorious World of Next Tuesday will be bestowed on both of you. Do we still do the Beet of the Week?
Red Salmon


Red Salmon
... (1) I have had a hard time containing my laughter. (2) This is bad because we Progs are naturally angry ...ad (1):
hehehe, Me(-and-surely-Papa-Kalashnikook-)Too!
Kalashnikook's agitation reminds one instantly of the glorious Soviet-FEMA indoctrinations.
Where also the axle/shaft "power take off" is most sternly dealt with.
ad (2):
da! da, Tavarishch!
Me(-and-surely-Papa-Kalashnikook-)Too on the spot smashed that irrational urge to ‒ as the dekadent kkkapitalist calls it ‒ "laugh".
Yes, I even went to the very front of the

YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR ACCIDENTS


Papa Kalashnikook
Mikhail Lysenkomann
Papa Kalashnikook
Glorious Komrades! I propose a new Award for news coverage of some infinitesimally unimportant Trump OUTRAGE! I call the award the WAAA! The Wrapped Around the Axle Award. Thoughts?
Only one thought. That's not an axle. It's a drive shaft.
The People's Tractor Factory knows it as a "power take off".
This reminds me of this earlier classic topic -
Soviet Accident Prevention Posters
That was, of course, in the Golden Age now known as BT (before Trump).
Today that entire thread could be remade to describe the MSM's misfortunes AT (anno Trump).
For example...












Red Square
Drive-by media must also avoid circular firing squadsThis reminds me:
Корней Чуковский
Волки от испуга скушали друг другаOr, if I dare to attempt a translation, something like:
Korney Chukovsky
Out of great dread, wolves ate each other dead.





YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR ACCIDENTS
You are not responsible for accidents!



Komrade mi
Корней Чуковский
Волки от испуга скушали друг другаTook a gander there, and:
By Marx, ↑ мужеложство???
Or, in modern terms, gomosyeksualizm???
P.S. Komrade mi, big spasiba for (indirect) pointer to Тараканище! _(ah, learning never ends)
P.P.S.
(à propos "shining bootlegs" of the "Kremlin highlander" alias Batyushka vel Soso, aka Stalin)
P.P.P.S.
"Kremlin highlander"... "shining bootlegs"... _
and then, Sztálin csizmája, buty Stalina . . . . .


Erupting with glee at the diagnosis of a president close to imminent death, and pining for the good old days when the media was invited into the Soviet ruler's inner sanctum for the Current Truth, the talking points to be broadcast later that night, Sanjay Gupta, Professor of Self-Proctology and Deeper Insertion got off his knee pads on live TV and admitted surprise after reviewing the Trump scans. For the first time in decades Gupta saw CNN's old benefactor staring back at him.
CNN could not believe its luck after Barack Obama went surfing and Hillary Clinton suddenly abandoned the network the end of 2016 with no explanation about what happened. However, the network has not abandoned their president, Hillary Clinton: "I'm With Her!" proclaimed Andrew Cuomo last night. Cuomo is one of the CNN most reliable hosts at "The Most Trusted Network" on television.
Rumor no longer: Josef Stalin, an old friend of the Old Left, the New Left and the Leftover Left, reappeared for the first time since 1956, physically inserted, but looking stiff and dehydrated, in the President's nether regions.
He was startled by the bright light at the end of the colonoscope and shooed it away, agreeing for an interview "sometime in the future." Dr. Gupta asked Joe if he will confirm Trump's colluding with Russia and the IP Daily report of Yellow River Games at the hotel room with Russian hookers. Komrade Stalin replied, according the Dr. Gupta, "of course!"
CNN's headline scrolling by at the bottom of the screen announced: Josef Stalin is back!
Cheers erupted at Obama Headquarters.
Senator Jeff Flake turned to his mate Senator John McCain, as both have agreed to become CNN hosts after they leave office, and said: "See? I told you so!"
Co-host Jake Tapper and the panel including Chris Cuomo and Don Lemon sat there dumbfounded, realizing that CNN's dreams have finally come true after the network's heroic efforts over a year and a half to prove that Donald Trump was Vladimir Putin's blood brother with no birth certificate and an ugly wife with bad legs.
The panel's host Don Lemon dismissed Barack Obama's doctor holding the news conference as a "Trump Fanboy." Lemon said that the doctor "defected" to the west and was bribed by Trump's lawyers with Russian hookers.
Pulling off his latex gloves and his Che baseball cap, Sanjay smiled for the cameras as he puffed up his chest. "No one will doubt the Trump-Russian Collusion, Coordination and Conspiracy story Hillary gave us any more!" he said proudly. "It's a great story and she paid for it handsomely. Now we have the Smoking Gun, er, the Smokin' Stalin!"