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Forget God Made a Farmer - What Matters is Who Created Julia

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Forget God Made a Farmer - What Matters is Who Created Julia.

Genesis says God created man. We learned from Paul Harvey that God made a farmer. But do we know who created Julia?

Long ago, Michelangelo artistically showed God creating Man. He also artistically depicted the Fall of Man flowing from Man having listened to Woman (but, of course, he chose not to depict how such Fall led to the joys of procreative activity and parenting.)

And, according to Genesis, The Fall also made farmers necessary, but yet it wasn't until a few years ago that Farmers received adequate credit when Paul Harvey explained why "God Made a Farmer," which explanation Chrysler reprised in 2013 as a SuperBowl advertisement for trucks. But no one has explained the Creation of Julia and her progeny-- until now:

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Now, this explains a lot. In the Gospel According to Marx, Julia was unable to resist the temptation to eat nuts and her downfall was that she thereby became a Tea-Bagger. Overcome by grief and shame that she had disobeyed Karl's Commandment, she became depressed and succumbed to even more temptations while striving with all her might to eschew tea-baggerism.

She kept going down in her spiral but nevertheless eventually became pregnant without knowing which of the many might have been the father, all of whom fled in a cowardly fashion soon after learning she was pregnant. Misunderstanding directions to Planned Parenthood during her 41st week of pregnancy, she sought help at a Catholic hospital, where she delivered a baby girl, whom she named "Little Julia," so she could follow in her mother's missteps.

Years later, as a result of the understandable stress of having to care for Julia, which entailed many things that had to be done every day such as feeding and clothing Little Julia, finding someone to drive her to the ObamaCare Day Care center, hanging around the grocery store to have sympathetic friends use her ObamaFood Stamps to buy groceries for themselves and then come out and give her the money she needed to satisfy her crack addition, trying to figure out how to watch "American Idolatry" on her ObamaPhone, etc. etc., she found a compassionate pimp and became a High Class Crack Whore and ceased worrying about Little Julia, who had wandered away from middle school at age 10.

Unable to find her way back home, Little Julia continued wandering until she found an orphanage, where she became known as "Little Orphan Julia." However, being restless like her mother, she ran away from the orphanage seeking to find someone to take care of her without demanding that she perform chores (helping with cleaning, dishwashing, etc.) regularly performed by the other orphans. Then she found her way to a family of Tea-Partiers, who began taking care of her. Soon afterward, she tired of their constantly preaching the importance of "self-reliance," and "personal responsibility" and their demands that she perform the same kinds of "illegal child-labor" chores demanded at the orphanage, so she ran away yet again. Soon thereafter, she encountered Karl's Arch Angel:

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So now, what will happen to Little Orphan Julia now that she's been adopted by Karl's Arch Angel as the new boss of her mother's HelpMate (Uncle Sam)? Some may ask, "What happened to Daddy Warbucks?" Won't he show-up at the last minute and save Little Orphan Julia? Rumors persist that he went Galt after concluding that the "last minute" already passed on November 6, 2012. Indeed, rumors abound that even Lady Liberty may be on the verge of shrugging:

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--KOOK
Last edited by KOOK on 2/17/2013, 9:42 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Reason for editing this post: fix links

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Women were obviously more robust when first created. They have gone soft through the deleterious effects of Capitalism and gluten.

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ThePeoplesComrade wrote:Women were obviously more robust when first created. They have gone soft through the deleterious effects of Capitalism and gluten.
Comrade PeoplesComrade, we may be glad that some have not given in to those deleterious effects.
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Anyer Marx wrote:
ThePeoplesComrade wrote:Women were obviously more robust when first created. They have gone soft through the deleterious effects of Capitalism and gluten.
Comrade PeoplesComrade, we may be glad that some have not given in to those deleterious effects.


Remember this honest acknowledgment during the campaign - it probably lost him the election!


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Anyer Marx wrote:
ThePeoplesComrade wrote:Women were obviously more robust when first created. They have gone soft through the deleterious effects of Capitalism and gluten.
Comrade PeoplesComrade, we may be glad that some have not given in to those deleterious effects.
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Comrade Anyer Marx, how did you get access to my Bain Binder?

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