Image

Hope and Change (TM)- in a nutshell

User avatar
Pre-Prog OLD VERSION...Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

Grasshopper thinks Ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, Ant is warm and well fed. Grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!


Progressive MODERN VERSION... Antworks hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.Grasshopper thinks Ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, shivering Grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why Ant is allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.CBS, NBC , PBS, CNN,and ABC show up to provide pictures of shivering Grasshopper next to a video of Ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, poor Grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with Grasshopper and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green.'

ACORNstages a demonstration in front of Ant's house where the news stations film the group singing 'We Shall Overcome.' Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray to God for Grasshopper's sake.President Obama condemns Ant and blames President Bush, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the Pope for Grasshopper's plight.Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reidexclaim in an interview with Larry King that Ant has gotten rich off the back of Grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on Ant to make him pay his fair share.Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

Ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government Green Czar and given to Grasshopper. The story ends as we see Grasshopper and his free-loading friends finishing up the last bits of Ant's food while the government house he is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be Ant's old house, crumbles around them, because Grasshopper doesn't maintain it. Ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen again. Grasshopper is found dead in a drug-related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the ramshackle, once prosperous and once peaceful, neighborhood.The entire nation collapses bringing the rest of the free world with it.

User avatar
Turboski, you have been watching Faux Noise! How else could your brain have been so damaged as to repeat this scandal. We all know that the ant is guilty because the ant works.

It's that simple. The ant works.

Report to Jiffi-Lobo for a major adjustment.



 
POST REPLY