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Newsweek: Obama Is The First Gay President

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The recent Newsweek cover presenting Obama as the first gay President is leaving too much to the imagination of the unsophisticated American public. The ambiguity could have been avoided with only a few additional touches. Our Department of Visual Revisionism has improved the cover to show Newsweek how it's done.

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THE FIRST GAY PRESIDENT:
Because having a $15 trillion deficit
and 8.1% unemployment
IS REALLY GAY

LIST OF GAY THINGS ABOUT OBAMA:
DEBT
DEFICIT
UNEMPLOYMENT
CORRUPTION
DIVISIVENESS
DEMORALIZATION
SOLYNDRA
FAST AND FURIOUS
MUSLIM BROTHERHOOD
SECRET SERVICE
NATIONAL SECURITY LEAKS
GSA
~
AND ANOTHER TAKE:

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THE FIRST GAY PRESIDENT by Andrew Sullivan
MICHELLE O: THE FIRST BEARD OF THE UNITED STATES
REGGIE LOVE: I HAD TO KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT ALL THIS TIME
IRANIAN PREZ: THE GREAT SATAN HAS JUST BECOME GREATER!
JOE BIDEN: HEY, AND I'M THE FIRST "BI" VICE PRESIDENT!
I TOLD YOU SO! by Larry Sinclair

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As a practical matter, all the ignorant, illiterate, and Passed On voters are all listed under the category "Assisted Voting Required".
Such welcoming vagueness, lacking specificity and intent.

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Democrats have always been all good things to all people and now that trend continues. In 1991 America elected Bill Clinton to be "the first black President". In 2009 the Nobel Peace Prize was awarded to Dear Leader, just for being Dear Leader. And now, in 2012, the Ministry of Propaganda has most gloriously awarded the grand title of "First Gay President" to Barack Obama. It is without a doubt a title he deserves and a title that many of us have long suspected was well overdue. It is a good thing the media is on our sides, comrades. I am very pleased that the Ministry of Propaganda did not give George W. Bush the title of the "First Iraqi President" for his liberation occupation of 50 million Iraqis. Or entitled Bush with the "First AIDS President" for his $15 Billion in foreign contributions to fight HIV/AIDS in Africa. No! Such titles are only deserving of the most progressive among us and President Obama is most deserving, indeed. Why the Ministry has not yet entitled President Obama as the "The First Woman President" for his glorious actions to raise "Julia" from cradle to grave is not yet known. Perhaps it is simply an oversight that will soon be corrected.
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Comrades,
We should all rejoice in Dear Leader's good fortune of being elevated above mortal and even immortal to 'Obama, Patron Saint of Gays'. Newsweek's work on this should be seen as a benefit to all, gay, straight or whatever and not as a cynical ploy to one-up Time's titty baby cover.It has also been announced that a nice shade of 'coral' has been chosen to paint the White House adding that "they are just so good with colors".

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yuri trotynov wrote:Newsweek's work on this should be seen as a benefit to all, gay, straight or whatever and not as a cynical ploy to one-up Time's titty baby cover.
A glorious observation, indeed. As you can see. TIME is not to be outdone by NEWSWEEK and has just released the cover for its next issue.
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Help! Please! Is there an adult in the house?!

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Once again, life imitates The Cube !

( I really resent " Newsweak " cutting in on our schtick ! )


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If Newsweek is not hiding it, neither should we. BigFurHat didn't oussyfoot around and combined Time and Newsweek into Timeweek.

No Need To Password Protect Anymore – The Preezy is Gay

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Comrade Square,
As seamless and equal as your melding of these two factual news sources is, you forgot one thing-Dear Leader's gaylo.



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In 2008, we had to vote for Obama to prove we're not racist.

In 2012, we must vote for him again, this time to prove we're not homophobic.

Do I have it straight? (Or should I rephrase that?)


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Irony Curtain suggested an alternative cover with Romney saying THE FIRST AMERICAN PRESIDENT SINCE 2008. Here it is:

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I always thought Moochelle was a bit masculine. Perhaps she's "the man" in their relationship?

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Now BigFurHat suggests THE FIRST STRAIGHT PRESIDENT SINCE 2008

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Glenn Beck made up a slogan for Romney: "At least he's not a commie." The Newsweek cover makes it possible to add to that: "At least he's not gay."

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And another version:

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Commissarka Pinkie wrote: In 2012, we must vote for him again, this time to prove we're not homophobic.

There is nobody I would rather have to raise awareness on this issue & rock the vote than you, Commissarka.

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PaulLemmen - nice work. Challenge accepted. We already had a few up our sleeve (this theme was nothing but unexpected).

Barack Obama: the Second Lady of the United States


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And who can forget the historic meeting between Obama and Russian President Medvedev at 2012 Seoul Nuclear Security Summit?

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Obama: This can be solved but it's important for him to give me space.
Medvedev: Yeah, I understand. I understand your message about space. Space for you.
Obama: This is my last election. After my election, I'll have more flexibility.
Medvedev: I understand. I will transmit this information to Vladimir.

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Q: How do you separate Obama from a gay lobbyist?
A: With a crowbar.


And that is not all! Obama is the FIRST FLEXIBLE PRESIDENT!

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Red Square wrote:Q: How do you separate Obama from a gay lobbyist?
A: With a high-pressure cold water hose!

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Disturbing news Comrades,

The party has instructed us to imply that Lincoln was the first gay president. We do so to discredit that rethuglican. We must show that the rethuglican party of old has evolved into all heterosexual party of overpopulation.

I am still awaiting instructions on how to handle this error. Certainly there can be only one "1st"?

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Comrade Paradigm,
Who is this Linkoln you speak of? Another president? The Party has said there is, was always been and will always be only one president, Dear Leader. He was there through all of Julia's life and what a glorious life it was. We can only hope he will be there for ours.

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[highlight=#ffffff]An article worthy of People's Cube-[/highlight]

Barack Obama: Our First Gay-Female-Hispanic-Asian-Jewish President
Eric Randall
May 14, 2012
Atlantic Wire

https://www.theatlanticwire.com/politics/2012/05/obama-our-first-gay-female-black-hispanic-asian-jewish-president/52299/

The comments are pretty interesting too.


Fun with words. Let's take "Evolving" for instance. Now when a gay wants his lover to flip flop from his back to his belly, tell him to evolve..............

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You are all missing the point. Obama is the first gay president, and the first woman president because of Julia. He's the first of everything. North Korean history starts with the birth of the current Dear Leader's grandfather; American history will start from January, 2009. Before that time, the seas were rising, old people were freezing in their homes, the urban poor murderedwas being murdered by white Hispanics, and there was a general sense of malaise and despair.

All of which stopped on the election of The One. Obama is the First President. For life. One corpse, one vote, one time.

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The loveliest of them all. Wish Comrade Red Square had done it...
PaulLemmen wrote:
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The post title says it all for me!

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THIS IS WHAT OUR GLORIOUS LEADER DOES: HE REACHES OUT TO THE PEOPLE, NO MATTER THEIR ORIENTATION!!!! THIS IS WHAT MAKES HIM GREAT!!!
[/color][highlight=#ff0000][highlight=#ff0000]ON TO VIKTORY IN THE NEW NOVEMBER REVOLUTION! VIKTORY KOMRADE OBAMA! VIKTORY TO HIS SUPPORTERS!!! VIKTORY TO INKLUSIVENESS![/highlight][/highlight]

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Yeah, his stance on "gay 'Marriage'" has "evoplcved" alright: like hows about since the time he was a state pol from Illinois? He lavishly praised the "courage" of the house and senate when Don't Ask... was repealed, then just as lavishly signed the repeal into law.....and suddenly he's "evolved"?

Right.....[/color]

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Just like he "Won" last wednesday's debate....


 
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