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ObamaCare-- The Final Thrust-- Medicine, Science & Aliens

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ObamaCare-- The Final Thrust-- Medicine, Science & Aliens--

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At the behest of Rahm Rod, I'm reporting on what is now the Final Thrust of our Leader's campaign for enactment of ObamaCare with the most important talking points being: (A) to counter the Right-Wing lies that unqualified aliens will be eligible for ObamaCare and (B) to emphasize that Sound Medicine and Science indisputably prove the superiority of ObamaCare.
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First, as the news-image above amply shows, Rahm Rod Emanuel is illustrating the first prong of our attack on Right Wing Lies. ObamaCare will require extensive examination of everyone who may be an alien to determine whether he (as in the news-image above) or she (as in the news-image below) has suitable credentials to be eligible to receive ObamaCare. Thus, no alien without suitable credentials will be eligible to receive ObamaCare.
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Now that the Na'vis have become the aliens most eagerly welcomed into American culture since Pocohontas was duped by Captain John Smith, there can be no doubt that all Americans will not only refuse to object to ObamaCare for Na'vis but will instead insist on their being deemed eligible.
.<br>A second prong in the Final Thrust of our Campaign Against Right-Wing Lies is to show that science indisputably establishes that ObamaCare constitutes the best means for providing equal eligibility for health care for all Americans (and aliens with suitable credentials). The scentific graph below presents the scientific evidence, which has been peer-reviewed by Nature, the preeminent scientific publication in the world. (Nature proved it's reliability in validating scientific findings by thrice embracing the brilliant work of the physicist Jan Hendrik Schön in discovering the "Holy Grail" of molecular-memory for computers as well as Nature's contribution to saving the planet by repeatedly validating the findings of the University of East Anglia irrefutably establishing Anthropogenic Global Warming.)
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As can be readily discerned from examining the results of the rigorous scientific findings based on CBO studies, there is no doubt that ObamaCare will rectify the shocking disparities in heath-care accessibility that became most pronounced during the Era of Bush. For the same reason that all physicists agree that red plus green plus blue = white, these scientific findings show how implementation of ObamaCare will eliminate the erratic nature of the three most important accessibility curves-- above the mean, the mean and below the mean. Thus, ObamaCare will replace such erraticism with the sustainable accessibility curves shown by the white line "as far into the future as the eye can see."
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We note, however, that some high party officials took discomfort in their observation of the illusion of "flatness" in the accessibility curve to be guaranteed by ObamaCare. To alleviate such discomfort, our scientists added a special notation that not only quiets the fears of such party leaders but also clearly demonstrates ObamaCare's committment to transparency because the accessibility curves applicable to high party officials and official celebrities are transparent, which prevents confusion that might arise in the minds of proles and others who may be less scientifically sophisticated than party leaders.
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Now that Pelosi and Reid (and Rahm Rod) are poised for the "final thrust" to "ram though" the vital reforms of ObamaCare, all we need to do is sit back and watch the Right Wing squirm.

--GAIA Minister Neytiri reporting for The Peoples Cube.

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GAIA Minister Neytiri wrote: Now that Pelosi and Reid (and Rahm Rod) are poised for the "final thrust" to "ram though" the vital reforms of ObamaCare, all we need to do is sit back and watch the Right Wing squirm.

--GAIA Minister Neytiri reporting for The Peoples Cube.

Comrade Neytiri, I feel grave concern . . . we should be covering aliens, no matter where they come from. Mexiho, Iranistan or Mars. That is the Progressive way. The idea of Rahm 'Rod' examining anyone other than Bwany the Fwank or Massa 'the mass'a' scares the jebbies outa me.
Rahm Ram it through is key to fighting reichwingers and their lies, but we need all aliens to conceive the greatest collective.
Here are some of the charming illegals, desiring to be part of the Amerika healthcare and freebie reform of Obama. So cute; so in need of our jobs white Amerikans won't do.

As we can clearly see, one must be in need of medical attention (Rahm 'Rod' assisted?) and one is giving the Obama Salute! Glorious!!

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Comrade Nyet-eerie,

I find your pics very arousing (in a rabble rousing way). I'm so sorry that your tail has rotted off, probably the result of unequal distribution of health care during the Bushiter years. I also hope that Dr. Rahm warmed his hands before fingering your boyfriend's blueberries.

I second the Fraulein's comments. We must cover all aliens, Hindoolians, Hispaniels and even terrorists from Palestain.

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Fraulein Pulloskies wrote:
GAIA Minister Neytiri wrote: Now that Pelosi and Reid (and Rahm Rod) are poised for the "final thrust" to "ram though" the vital reforms of ObamaCare, all we need to do is sit back and watch the Right Wing squirm.

--GAIA Minister Neytiri reporting for The Peoples Cube.
The idea of Rahm 'Rod' examining anyone other than Bwany the Fwank or Massa 'the mass'a' scares the jebbies outa me.

My Dear Fraulein,

Having become suspicious that you might be an alien imposter for the svelt Fraulein we've all come to love and respect, I'm sending Rahm Rod to your office to probe your credentials (as soon as he finishes the appointment shown below).
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No, strike tha-- Since you've of the feminine gender, it would be wrong to send Rahm and thereby enable him to gaze upon your unadorned pulchritude. So, instead, I'm sending American's Primary Care Physician. He'll make a house call at your office as soon as he finishes the appointment shown immediately below. Please make yourself ready.
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Image I'll expect a full report from Dr. Dean.

--GAIA Minister Neytiri

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Comrade Whoopie wrote:Comrade Nyet-eerie,

I find your pics very arousing (in a rabble rousing way). I'm so sorry that your tail has rotted off, probably the result of unequal distribution of health care during the Bushiter years. I also hope that Dr. Rahm warmed his hands before fingering your boyfriend's blueberries.

I second the Fraulein's comments. We must cover all aliens, Hindoolians, Hispaniels and even terrorists from Palestain.

My Dear Comrade Whoopie,

It's not commonly known that not all Na'vis have tails. (Just as not all humans have brains-- especially those right-wingers and Sasquatches such as Sarah Palin.) However, the Na'vi females without tails are not without brains. We know that among humans, the term tail has a different meaning, but Na'vi females without tails are revered in our culture. We don't worship tail, but we do admire the physical beauty of tail. However, in a genuinely collectivist, progressive mindset, we welcome and honor the females not equipped for males interested in tail.

However, this is not to denigrate male Na'vis attracted to female Na'vis without tails.

It's also not uncommon for there to be a male Na'vi who never gets any tail. They are called "Na'vi Nerds" or "RepublicaNa'vis."

I hope this cultural edification has been helpful.

--GAIA Minister Neytiri

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GAIA Minister Neytiri wrote: My Dear Fraulein,

Having become suspicious that you might be an alien imposter for the svelt Fraulein we've all come to love and respect, I'm sending Rahm Rod to your office to probe your credentials (as soon as he finishes the appointment shown below).
. No, strike tha-- Since you've of the feminine gender, it would be wrong to send Rahm and thereby enable him to gaze upon your unadorned pulchritude. So, instead, I'm sending American's Primary Care Physician. He'll make a house call at your office as soon as he finishes the appointment shown immediately below. Please make yourself ready.

I'll expect a full report from Dr. Dean.

--GAIA Minister Neytiri

Dear Sir Comrade Neytiri ~ Nein, indeed! No gazing allowed in the gulag. Not by Rahm Rod, Dr. Dizzy Dean or Fraulein Nanski herself. Not unless their "blueberries" are to be carried home in a paper bag. Nein do we have alien imposters, illegal imposters or imposter imposters. Only future Jiffy-Lobo allegiance-tiers. No mountebanks in the Peoples Gulag!

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This post greatly concerns me comrade, As a very ancient alien myself I must know how does an alien qualify for obamacare? Do I have to appear human? Or simple are fondleable parts like a human does? What if I don't technically have a corporal body to be fondled? Do I have to have been born in the United States to qualify? or what if i have simply lived here for the last 10,000 years?
Normally I would just set up an appointment to see Rahm but I am afraid that I may actually qualify for the public option and have suffer through all that govenrment bureaucracy just to get some cold medicine miss out on a chance to embark on this great collectivist experiment. Maybe I should just keep on using the emergency rooms for every sniffly nose I get like all the other aliens do.

Confusing health care qualifications, having to fist bills through congress, requiring science to validate your great leader: Good Father Below People! life on earth would so much easier if it was like the glorious People's Paradise of Pademonium in which all citizens recieve no healthcare what so ever a tottally equal and universally distributed supply of health care.

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commissar Cthulhu wrote:This post greatly concerns me comrade, As a very ancient alien myself I must know how does an alien qualify for obamacare? Do I have to appear human? Or simple are fondleable parts like a human does? What if I don't technically have a corporal body to be fondled? Do I have to have been born in the United States to qualify? or what if i have simply lived here for the last 10,000 years?
Normally I would just set up an appointment to see Rahm but I am afraid that I may actually qualify for the public option and have suffer through all that govenrment bureaucracy just to get some cold medicine miss out on a chance to embark on this great collectivist experiment. Maybe I should just keep on using the emergency rooms for every sniffly nose I get like all the other aliens do.

Confusing health care qualifications, having to fist bills through congress, requiring science to validate your great leader: Good Father Below People! life on earth would so much easier if it was like the glorious People's Paradise of Pademonium in which all citizens recieve no health care what so ever a tottally equal and universally distributed supply of health care.

Dear Commissar Cthulhu,

I'm embarrassed to admit you're one of the Progs I had not yet met. Indeed, from your self-description, you seem like a character that perhaps tangled with Seven of Nine-Twelve in the Gamma Quadrant. I have a score to settle with her. I was caught off-guard when she suddenly "beamed onto" my beloved Pandora to make right-wing accusations against me, against James Cameron and against the noble Gorbels Cube.
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An incorporeal alien? Hmmmmm. You have no pocket for a Green Card. No arm on which a number could be tatooed. No way for a DNA chip to be embedded into your non-body. No possibility of being photographed for a driver's license ID. Thus, your documentation will have to be a "spiritual" form of documentation. You may think that is new, but we've had incorporeal forms of documentation on Pandora for eons, and when I arrived on Earth and began studying the recent history, I learned that "spiritual documentation" began on Earth at a place/event called "Woodstock." Those spiritually documented earthlings (sometimes called "Hippies") have, thanks to our progressive movement, reached the highest places of government, culture and edication (k through PhD). They automatically know who is, and who isn't, "authentic," so all that will be necessary for you to receive services under ObamaCare is to be sure you seek such services from a ObamaCare Professional schooled in spiritual documentation. Many of them are kept busy by their active practice prescribing medical marijuana to needy comrades, many of whose regular suppliers may have, unfortunately, taken bullets in their heads in Mexico.

Since you are incorporeal, I assume you can easily transport yourself to San Francisco or Los Angeles, where spiritually enlightened practitioners of ObamaCare are located. Make sure to time your arrival around mid-morning when they are likely to have recovered from their previous-night high and thus less likely to think your presence is a hallucination rather than reality. Then, get their attention by whispering into their ears (I assume your incorporeal powers include the ability to vibrate their ear-drums in the appropriate rhythms to simimulate their hearing you speak to them) a current message to them from Jimmie Hendricks. Hearing an authentic message from the long-deceased Hendricks will enable them to spiritually validate you and know that you are an alien entitled to treatment under ObamaCare.
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If these suggestions don't work, you are -- as Earthlings are wont to say-- up a creek belonging to excrementory material without a broad tool useful for propulsion along such creek in order to arrive at a part not under such ownership.

I wish you the best of luck. By the way, when I next do battle with Seven of Nine-Twelve, who has that wierd ability to instantly materialize out of nowhere, I could use the assistance of an incorporeal alien loyal to the Greater Good.

--GAIA Minister Neytiri

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Neytiri,

Bravo on the
Bodacious
Big
Blue
Bare
Buttz and
Boobies!

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Czar Czar wrote:Neytiri,

Bravo on the
Bodacious
Big
Blue
Bare
Buttz and
Boobies!

Czar Czar,

It seems I find you everywhere. Only a short while ago you were in Leninka's domain, and now you enter mine, but yet you surprise me. I would expect you greatest bravos would be for the Rahm Rod. I wonder if you suffer (enjoy?) a similar condition to that of some of the Na'vi females without tails.

Oops, I'm being interrupted. Gotta go.

--GAIA Minister Neytiri

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Once again, you are correct Neytiri. It's just like Rahm to Finger the true needs of the collective.

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GAIA Minister Neytiri wrote:
commissar Cthulhu wrote:This post greatly concerns me comrade, As a very ancient alien myself I must know how does an alien qualify for obamacare? Do I have to appear human? Or simple are fondleable parts like a human does? What if I don't technically have a corporal body to be fondled? Do I have to have been born in the United States to qualify? or what if i have simply lived here for the last 10,000 years?
Normally I would just set up an appointment to see Rahm but I am afraid that I may actually qualify for the public option and have suffer through all that govenrment bureaucracy just to get some cold medicine miss out on a chance to embark on this great collectivist experiment. Maybe I should just keep on using the emergency rooms for every sniffly nose I get like all the other aliens do.

Confusing health care qualifications, having to fist bills through congress, requiring science to validate your great leader: Good Father Below People! life on earth would so much easier if it was like the glorious People's Paradise of Pademonium in which all citizens recieve no health care what so ever a tottally equal and universally distributed supply of health care.

Dear Commissar Cthulhu,

I'm embarrassed to admit you're one of the Progs I had not yet met. Indeed, from your self-description, you seem like a character that perhaps tangled with Seven of Nine-Twelve in the Gamma Quadrant. I have a score to settle with her. I was caught off-guard when she suddenly "beamed onto" my beloved Pandora to make right-wing accusations against me, against James Cameron and against the noble Gorbels Cube.
.
An incorporeal alien? Hmmmmm. You have no pocket for a Green Card. No arm on which a number could be tatooed. No way for a DNA chip to be embedded into your non-body. No possibility of being photographed for a driver's license ID. Thus, your documentation will have to be a "spiritual" form of documentation. You may think that is new, but we've had incorporeal forms of documentation on Pandora for eons, and when I arrived on Earth and began studying the recent history, I learned that "spiritual documentation" began on Earth at a place/event called "Woodstock." Those spiritually documented earthlings (sometimes called "Hippies") have, thanks to our progressive movement, reached the highest places of government, culture and edication (k through PhD). They automatically know who is, and who isn't, "authentic," so all that will be necessary for you to receive services under ObamaCare is to be sure you seek such services from a ObamaCare Professional schooled in spiritual documentation. Many of them are kept busy by their active practice prescribing medical marijuana to needy comrades, many of whose regular suppliers may have, unfortunately, taken bullets in their heads in Mexico.

Since you are incorporeal, I assume you can easily transport yourself to San Francisco or Los Angeles, where spiritually enlightened practitioners of ObamaCare are located. Make sure to time your arrival around mid-morning when they are likely to have recovered from their previous-night high and thus less likely to think your presence is a hallucination rather than reality. Then, get their attention by whispering into their ears (I assume your incorporeal powers include the ability to vibrate their ear-drums in the appropriate rhythms to simimulate their hearing you speak to them) a current message to them from Jimmie Hendricks. Hearing an authentic message from the long-deceased Hendricks will enable them to spiritually validate you and know that you are an alien entitled to treatment under ObamaCare.
.
If these suggestions don't work, you are -- as Earthlings are wont to say-- up a creek belonging to excrementory material without a broad tool useful for propulsion along such creek in order to arrive at a part not under such ownership.

I wish you the best of luck. By the way, when I next do battle with Seven of Nine-Twelve, who has that wierd ability to instantly materialize out of nowhere, I could use the assistance of an incorporeal alien loyal to the Greater Good.

--GAIA Minister Neytiri

Comrade Cthulhu,

In the meantime, make sure you fill out the 2010 Census. Just write in Cthulhu in the box marked "Other." This will allow you to prove that you have lived here (at some point in the future). It will also give you instant minority status (anyone who is not a Caucasian non-hispanic (they now allow you to clarify whether or not you are a Caucasian hispanic or a non-Caucasian hispanic), is marked-branded-labeled a minority. That you do not have legs will enable you to qualify immediately for Social Security disability payments, and once you do that, I believe you will be eligible for Medicare (I think it works that way).


 
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