A lesson in instant gratification went bad when a New York high-school freshman's remark about assassinating President Bush earned him a visit from the Secret Service, prompting a loud outcry from the educational community. "I don't know where this President is taking our country if a student can no longer openly express his idealistic aspirations and make a difference," says English teacher who oversaw the publication of the student magazine that printed the boy's statement. The comment about shooting the president to become "a national hero" appeared under a section titled, "How long does it take to live?" in which students answered questions of how they would spend their last 24 hours alive before attempting to assassinate George Bush.
"Isn't killing Bush a good thing?" argue Irving's schoolmates in their friend's defense. "Isn't Bush a capitalist criminal that stole oil from the Middle East and unleashed global warming on Iraq, leaving the impoverished locals to blow themselves up from heat and exhaustion? Well, who would we rather believe - you or our professionally trained teachers?"
The consensus among the students and the faculty is that the "controversial" kill-Bush remark was "not a big deal" and that the simple-minded 14-year-old honestly and correctly reiterated the meaning of what they had learned in class: (1) this country is not worth living in or dying for, (2) Bush is the worst president, which is why (3) he must be killed, and (4) killing anyone is OK if it serves the Greater Good™.
Everybody wants to kill Bush! Don't you?
But the ACLU representative on campus sees it as a more complex issue. "On the one hand, we have a clear violation of every student's constitutional right to want to assassinate a Republican president. On the other hand, this student is a traitor and must be dealt with for disclosing the inner workings of the system, exposing it in a light that many still deem unfavorable. As the Party propaganda specialist, I can't say that his words were wrong - but they were certainly premature! This student double agent must become a non-student. Expel the saboteur!"
Randi Weingarten, president of the United Federation of Teachers, agrees: "While the end result of the progressive education is to make everyone want to kill George Bush, we haven't progressed enough to make it official yet."
Michael Moore: The problem here is America's upbeat, optimistic can-do attitude. That's what makes it stand apart from the rest of the world, and that's why it must be eliminated.
An Oscar-winning expert on public school violence Michael Moore told us this over the phone from his new office at Virginia Tech: "Progressive ideas of class struggle and changing the world for the Common Good™ came to America from Europe, a land inhabited by passive dreamers who fantasize about doing things but hardly ever put their money where the mouth is. Superimposed on American can-do culture through mass media and public education, our notion of progress created an explosive mix that makes me want to move to Europe. Because where Europeans only wallow in dreamy theories, Americans go ahead and do it. Therefore, to prevent any further acts of terror or school shootings, we must eliminate America's can-do attitude that has outlived its usefulness.
While all parties involved are positive that the issue will be dealt with in due time, one question on everybody's minds remains unanswered: "Who was the snitch that leaked the damn paper to the Secret Service?"
Premier BettyWow... in my progressive English class, we just turned in our essay's about what we would do if we only had 1 month left to live. The resemblance to this assignment is almost unbelievable. It's like the teachers are organizing cross-country these assignments to get everyone to try to kill Bush.
BranishThis thread topic reminds me of how much better we are than RepubliKKKans. We are peaceful (except when it comes to Bush). We are conscious of the value of life and human rights (except when it comes to Bush AND abortion). Finally, we are tolerant of everbody (again, except when it comes to Bush).
Commissar TheocritusABCdariusRex, why learn to spell? If you can spell you might read and if you can read then you might learn something. So much more fun to squint your eyes and scream without the need for thinking. Just a fish that have lived in caves for millennia no longer have eyes, soon our Socialist brothers will no longer have brains, only a throbbing lump at the base of the spine. But like a camel they'll be able to spit bile at everyone.
AbecedariusRexsurely have heard about Sheryl Crow's fatwa against bibs and napkins?
Comrade BranishI thought she had only issued a fatwa against toilet paper.
Commissar TheocritusThis takes some planning. On May Day I'm having a little fiesta on my rancho on the Rio Grande. Care to come? I have a senorita or two for you, and I'll keep the pool boys out of the way.
Quote:As we all know comrade Betty, academia is one of the last bastions of progressive Socialist thought here in "Imperialist Amerika"!!!
Commissar TheocritusMichael Moore could be served by parachute for a bib. Or perhaps he could lie on his back, his flippers in the air, and people could merely pour the swill into his gaping maw.
Quote:by EVELYN PRINGLE
Blue BellRethuglikan Kapitalism for Amerikka and Amerikkans !!
TrolletteRethuglikan Kapitalism for Amerikka and Amerikkans !!
Other theorists over time have also linked kitsch to totalitarianism. The Czech writer Milan Kundera, in his book The Unbearable Lightness of Being (1984), defined it as "the absolute denial of shit." His argument was that kitsch functions by excluding from view everything that humans find difficult to come to terms with, offering instead a sanitised view of the world in which "all answers are given in advance and preclude any questions."Once we are past the Rethuglikan Kapitalism then the heavens will be open and Order and Control will be ours because even the air under the Republicans, sorry, Rethuglikans, can't remember that clever bit, smells bad but under the Democrats a tannery will smell good. Under Rethuglikans the best health care on earth is bad because human institutions, no matter how good, are not perfect but under the Demokrats having the sign "Hospital" over an outhouse will give us the best health care on earth.
In its desire to paper over the complexities and contradictions of real life, kitsch, Kundera suggested, is intimately linked with totalitarianism. In a healthy democracy, diverse interest groups compete and negotiate with one another to produce a generally acceptable consensus; by contrast, "everything that infringes on kitsch," including individualism, doubt, and irony, "must be banished for life" in order for kitsch to survive. Therefore, Kundera wrote, "Whenever a single political movement corners power we find ourselves in the realm of totalitarian kitsch."
Commissar TheocritusABCDarian to the Trolls, Pedagogue to the Fuming and Scowling Classes, isn't it a wonder when one of your own rises to the point of...sarcasm? ...I hear that Home Depot has contractors to remodel your gulag, and you can pay over time. Little do they know that après le déluge, there will be no payment.
Comrade OtisMargaret is spot on. Blue Bell is a CIA agent troll trying to make us all look bad.
Comrade BellPut down your signs and bask in the shadows of the Crime Familes Bush-bin Laden !!
Commissar TheocritusChomsky actually did some good work--he definied something very useful and which makes the computer you use computationally tractable, an artifical grammar which can be parsed by a finite-state machine.
Commissar TheocritusIt is called a right-linear grammar.
Chairman M. S. Punchenko
Chairman M. S. Punchenko
Red SquareA set of pictures to illustrate this story comes from this pro-American blog whose author is currently in Iraq helping Bush to steal their oil:
gangkillerthis website is useless all of you are ranting on about shit
gangkiller....and by the U.S. opening still mills in the U.S.
gangkillerthis website is useless all of you are ranting on about shit
Private Pravdavery well said, comrade! you get "Beet of the Week"!
Chairman M. S. Punchenko"We're reading about the never ending struggle for the rights of the working class against the rigid class structure egineered by the Bush Plantation House! We're also getting an extra ration for distributing Choice buttons and other materials. Abort me, mister! Abort me now! Hehehehe! "
gangkiller....and by the U.S. opening still mills in the U.S.
gangkiller....and by the U.S. opening still mills in the U.S.
Red SquareHates Bush and The Cure. Sorry dude, Joe Strummer is dead. You can't go see The Clash. No Combat Rock for you.
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