Comrades, I know you have seen some of the ups and downs of getting your quota of contributions and appropriations that are so necesseary for us to achieve the final goal of the World of Next Tuesday. But have you ever considered the horrid scenes that the Chairman has witnessed? Sadly, due no doubt to the depression and starvation that has resulted from the war mongering Bush regime, there has been an upsurge in resistance to our efforts. I would like to show you just one recent scene the Chairman came across on one of his missions. It's not for the weak of heart,

"Them rats! Them dirty, cold-blooded, sore-headed, stinkin' Proles! Them ThoughtCrime™ Thinking, atrocity-committin' skunks ..."

Who could have done such a thing? I would normally accuse the Chairman of this, but seeing him with that reaction is quite perplexing. I have nothing to say....

There seems to be an underground movement that rather destroy their ill gotten gains rather than see the State get that which is properly ours. We will uproot them!

Hey Guys! I dropped in to see whats up and {gasp!} those self-centered do-or-die lunitics! Destroying THEIR property before the state can horde, er, redistribute it for the collective's good! Those whore mongers!

You can well imagine how this particular incident tore the Chairman up. What with the primaries and coming campaign against the rethuglicans, there is great need for spirits.

It is the Clinton (R - NY) supporters, Comrades. The Clinton (R - NY) supporters destroy their property everytime Obama wins another state. Why, in North Carolina alone we lost about 1.4 million in soon-to-be state property loses. I expect we will lose even more in the coming primaries to come all because of the Clinton (R - NY) supporters.

We be shakin' down the hood, my bloodhound bro and me...then we party for the Party!


Chairman, you can be assured you will get your full cut. And don't be dissin' our ride, it is fueled 100% by flatulence produced by our MTE.

it is an effective contribution combo. He plays the Good Cat, I the Bad Dog. And of course, the Chairman and Hillary will get their full cut. <Pssst>

Chairman, while I never doubt a word you say, why would the Clinton supporters have done such a thing after the huge victory yesterday in Obama's own backyard? N Carolina? Who cares?

(Pulls Commissar Pupovich aside) Pupovich, we all know where this is going. We all know the Obamessiah is unstoppable and we all know he has a hefty amount of cash on hand. I can't keep playing this game forever, Pup. I got Richmond Mayor Doug Wilder breathing down my neck and I also got that gnome Tim Kaine throwing bricks through my windows. The Party will ultimately go for Obama, Pup. And we for the moment have to appear somewhat supportive... that is until he is buried in the GE by the Republican Attack Machine and Clinton INC.

(Turning radio up louder) Just between us, yes Chairman, of course it will go this way. But isn't it wonderful? This competition between the two, not to mention the hundreds of thousands of rethuglicans who think we can't spot them, coming to the aide of the Empress, has certainly been a boon to our contribution collection! If only it could go on forever!