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Bloomberg Denounces 'Food Freedom' as Bourgeois Oppression

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Dear Comrades,

The Chief Commissar of Manhattangrad, Comrade Mikhail Bloomberg, has denounced the reactionary People's Court judge who recently overruled the Comrade's directive limiting the Peoples' Rations of sodas and other foods deemed ‘unhealthy' by the Party.

"I do think there are certain times we should infringe on your freedom," Comrade Mikhail stated during a broadcast of the American Media Collective.

He later went on to praise the work of his Department of Mandatory Health, which will continue to struggle for compulsory treatment of obesity and other destabilizing conditions that threaten the good order of Manhattangrad.

Citizens, we know that such Bourgeois concepts as ‘food freedom' often masquerade as desirable conditions. However, we also know that when people are permitted to set their own rations, they will often eat too much and not leave enough for the poor and disabled.

Comrade Mikhail is ensuring that the disadvantaged will be able to share in the prosperity of Manhattangrad, while also guaranteeing that all citizens will be healthy enough to complete their work quotas and not overburden the State's sick call facilities. This "food freedom" is nothing more than a clever disguise for Capitalist oppression!

Rationing a reasonable and fair. It is also healthy and compassionate. Reactionaries and counter-revolutionaries want you to eat too much so that you will not be able to work in our glorious progressive struggle for equality and fairness.

Down with anti-rationing non-conformists!
Support universal rationing and state-supervised portion controls!

Faithfully submitted to the Collective of the People's Cube,
Comrade Nomenklatura-climber
Dialectical Progressivism Translator

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Comrade;
Room 101 stands ready for the neo-kulak reprobates that dare question our superior moral relevance.

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Bloomberg, Soup Commie.

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Mikhail Vasiliovich knows that "food freedom" is really slavery. In food freedom we are slaves to decision-making, responsibility and consequences of our actions. Burst out of your chains, eaters of the world!


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Bloomberg thinks he and his like-minded totalitarian friends are a force of nature:

Business Insider wrote:New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg considers the domestic use of military-style drones “scary” but says that there is no way to stop it.
“Everybody wants their privacy, but I don't know how you're going to maintain it,” Bloomberg said on his weekly radio show. “It's just we're going into a different world, uncharted, and, like it or not, what people can do, what governments can do, is different … you can't keep the tides from coming in.

Simply to point out a purely historical fact and for no other reason: Back in the very civilized days of the American Revolution people much less statist than Bloomberg had their homes burned to the ground by the Sons of Liberty, everything they owned was destroyed and they had to flee the country with nothing but their lives, never return to the new United States. In hindsight and in a purely historical context that was a very good and necessary thing to do in order to preserve their freedom from tyranny and the kind of people that consider themselves to be, or are the representatives of people that consider themselves to be, a force of nature.

Comrades,

In a society of socialized medicine, the fiscal health (surplus taxes for redistribution) of the body state becomes more a function of the health and well being of each individual cell worker citizen. Mutated cells oppositionist are a direct threat to the health of thebody State and must be excised re-educated in healthy thought.Are you of the body?

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Don't you mean "Are you of the body party?" Comrade?

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$.$. Halliburton wrote: Simply to point out a purely historical fact and for no other reason: etc...
Comrade, I believe that the return of tarring and feathering is long overdue... figuratively speaking, of course. Ahumpf.

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Expel The Red States wrote:Comrades, etc, etc, etc

Damn Landruites are coming out of the woodwork.

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Ever hear of peak freedom? There's only a limited amount of freedom on this planet and, if we don't husband it properly, we could run out. Complete freedom is unsustainable, so we're instituting portion-control freedom, just the right amount of freedom we decide you need in any situation. We're also planning to ration freedom. People with last names that begin with letters A thru M will be free on even days and last names that begin with letters N thru Z will be free on odd days.

When is Commissar Bloomberg's new book, Mein Kapital coming out? Since the Kollective will not vote for what He wants, He will now expend the Wealth He has taken from the Kollective to impose His will. His pronouncements from the Ministry of Truth belie his intentions which are so redolent of "Le'tat says Moi." There are rumblings among the Proletariat about the formation of new Soda-viets.

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$.$. Halliburton wrote:people much less statist than Bloomberg had their homes burned to the ground by the Sons of Liberty
Are you implying that because The Right Honorable Mayor is a short little twerp (less statist) he should have is house burned to the ground? Or am I mistaken about "statist" meaning of diminutive stature and not worthy of note. Perhaps it means one who supports the state, which would be truly unfortunate to have such a short and inconsequential shrivel as support for our glorious state. I am not one to discriminate, mind you, because of anyone's size and will donate little bits of money to all midget and dwarf causes both tiny and small. And I stand ready, stool in hand, to assist our Right Honorable Mayor should he wish to view a passing Macy's Parade on Thanksgiving Day in the event that Thanksgiving Day (or turkey) will still be allowed in N.Y.

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An artistic bit of progressive prose indeed! The juxtaposition of the Royal "We" of Government looming over the peonal "your rights" succinctly conveys the world of Next Tuesday!™ If only the "We" had more such phrasemeisters!


 
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