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Help Kickstart World War III

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President Obama needs your help starting World War III! Find out how you can help!

This is not one of those “dumb” Republican wars, this is a truly “smart” progressive war. We will run it using organic ammo and lots of social media. It's going to be fun!



Created by The Second City Network.

Ushanka tip to WATCHDOGWIRE – FLORIDA.

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Will we be using those "safer bullets" recommended by former Clinton administration U.S. Surgeon General, Joycelyn Elders?

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Safer bullets? Are those the ones that have a condom over the pointy end? Sandra Fluke would approve!

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Komrade Katz wrote:Safer bullets? Are those the ones that have a condom over the pointy end? Sandra Fluke would approve!
Indeed Comrade. They also provide free healthcare for the target once they are hit.

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I was skeptical until hearing about the potential volume of cat videos, and I got that tingle up my leg when I heard that relocation camps will have wi-fi, it was like a hope-ium flashback! Where do I sign up?

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"Because Obama" is all I am needing to hear! I will immediately go extract funds from other people's pockets to assist the Cause.

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Joyous war will also save mother Gaia by aborting many post natal embryos and preventing their oppressive carbon footprints from marring her beauty!! When no one is left to appreciate her beauty it will indeed be a day to celebrate! Why weren't we pro WWIII sooner? Oracle Gore wants to know!


Why?

Because, Obama!

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We're sorry, but the war you've reached is no longer in service.

Please hang up and try again at a later time, with a different Al Qaeda.

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I AM PUTTING IN MY $25 TO RECEIVED COVETED ORNAMENTATION KISSED BY LINDSY GRAHAM! (swoon)
WAR IS GOOD. WAR IS PEACE!
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Free Wi-fi? Who could ask for more?

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Fraulein Frankenfeinstein wrote:I AM PUTTING IN MY $25 TO RECEIVED COVETED ORNAMENTATION KISSED BY LINDSY GRAHAM! (swoon)
WAR IS GOOD. WAR IS PEACE!
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Wait! There's more!! $30.00 gets your rubble an open mouth kiss and $40.00 gets you a personalized tile from a third world public urinal bathed by the tongue of Comrade Lindsay!! I just so happen to be remodeling my bathroom in a Mediterranean motif!

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Free Wi-fi? Most excellent!! Now I can log onto The Cube in between my shock treatments on my brand new, party approved, Obama Smart Phone!!!


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Capt. Commie,

That's a glorious device you have there! I bet its even got floating point decimal!! And an equals sign! Some progs have all the luck. Where do you get your shock treatments, anyway?

War armed conflict Heated argument Dialectic discussion will be fought conducted with glorious "small arms" automatic rifles supplied to foreign countries. Certainly not with evil "weapons of mass destruction" semi-automatic rifles possessed by wrong-thinking Americans.

Small arms never hurt anybody.

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Capt. Commie wrote:Free Wi-fi? Most excellent!! Now I can log onto The Cube in between my shock treatments on my brand new, party approved, Obama Smart Phone!!!

I am assuming you have the Official Obama phone, as I have, dear comrade, so I am wondering why mine is so much bigger? Maybe because I am a more important comrade?? ... (but I do like your model.)

I am not full of complaining!!! --- mine is glorious and works most of the time!!! but it is so hard to carry around...

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Captain Craptek wrote:Capt. Commie,

Where do you get your shock treatments, anyway?
They were part of the all inclusive Prole Vacation Package that I signed up for at the re-education camp.
Fraulein Frankenfeinstein wrote: I am assuming you have the Official Obama phone, as I have, dear comrade, so I am wondering why mine is so much bigger? Maybe because I am a more important comrade?? ... (but I do like your model.)

I am not full of complaining!!! --- mine is glorious and works most of the time!!! but it is so hard to carry around...

I like yours very much. I see it doubles as a bank to carry around some of the "Change" that Dear Leader has given us.


 
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